Home Advice Our Relationship Is Threatened By Insecurity & Double Standards:Pls Advise

Our Relationship Is Threatened By Insecurity & Double Standards:Pls Advise

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Hello ma’am,

Great job you are doing with Lively Stones. I need your advise. You can post it but hide my ID. My boyfriend and I have been together for almost a year. He is a nice guy and kind. Things are pretty serious with us,I see marriage in the picture but for one challenge.

Both of us are in the entertainment industry. He moves around and has alot of fans. Same as me.Because of the kind of industry we are,its easy to get alot of attention from the opposite s*x.

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Personally, I am not the jealous type. I don’t care about his many female fans. But he gets constantly insecure about my male fans. So, my ex is also in the entertainment space.Because of how my boyfriend is,I completely cut off all communication my ex.

But recently,my ex got a gig and contacted me to take the gig cos he wont be available. He is already booked on another gig. My boyfriend refused,saying I cannot take the gig cos it came from my ex.I was not happy. I called him insecure,we quarreled. In the end,I had to forget the gig just for peace sake.

Now, I just found out that he got a business proposal from one of his female fans that has been hitting on him and he is already doing business with this girl. For me,that is double standards and very selfish of him.

Also Read >>  Lock-Down: My Fiancee Won't Listen To Me-Says I Am Over Reacting
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Just yesterday,I mistakenly opened a chat from my Facebook messenger from my ex. He was just saying hi. Like generally checking on me cos of the lock down,etc. I read the chat but did not respond.

Later,I noticed my boyfriend was just being moody and all. So I asked him what was it. Do you know he saw the chat from my ex. The one I did not even respond to and he asked why am I still chatting with my ex.

Like seriously…what kind of jealousy abi insecurity is this? Do I have to explain every move about me? What about him that is doing business with a female that is waiting to pounce on his pants?

Honestly speaking,much as I like my boyfriend,I feel like this is a no no for me. Double standards and insecurity,I cant deal. Please advise me on what to do? I am tired of explaining myself to him.

Please advise.

 

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Our Relationship Is Threatened By Insecurity & Double Standards:Pls Advise
Jzhane
A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J

2 COMMENTS

  1. It appears your boyfriend needs to grow up in the are of trusting you.

    You trust him but he may not trust you. And no relationship can work without trust.

    So,have a conversation about this with him. Give him some time to work on his trust levels. If this does not improve after a couple of months,then your relationship may not work out.

    And maybe you should let him go. Make sure though,that there is really nothing for him to worry about when you relate with other men.

    This is just a relationship..if this continues into marriage,it could get worse and then you might get really frustrated. He might become possessive and over protective or even restrict your relationship with others.

    He needs to show that he can be comfortable with you dealing with anyone of the opposite s*x without getting insecure

    Choose now:either he works on his trust levels….or you bounce!

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