Home Advice My Relationship With My Half Sister Wants To Destroy My Life-Pt 2

My Relationship With My Half Sister Wants To Destroy My Life-Pt 2

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Click here to read part 1

Part 2

She was a virgin.

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I asked her why didn’t she tell me, she kept mute. I told her to keep it for her husband cos there is a blessing attached to it. I advised her as a big brother bit she refused. She stood she loved me and pleaded I break her.

So it happened after three attempts. We were doing this. Please don’t judge me, this is a girl I don’t know when they gave birth to her, we never stayed together before and I am 9 years older than her.

Soon she missed her period. Although she always complain of late period, we waited and there was nothing I could do. No money on me, I was just caged in that village. Not even a network signal. I can’t make calls. I managed to find network in a nearby bush and made a call to a Friend to borrow me some money.

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She said we should abort it because of my mum. So she took pills and it went out. I knelt down with tear in my eyes and apologize to her and begged her that we should stop this. She said ok.

One night she started and I said to her, we have agreed not to do this again, she said she has fallen in love with me and wishes to marry me. I resisted but she threatened to tell mum all we have been doing, so I obliged. My regret grew bigger.

Thank God, by November I left that village and went to Abuja for a movie shoot. After the movie I swore not to go back to that village. I begged for money and headed to Lagos. Mind you, ileft some of my clothes, shoes and laptop I use in writing scripts because I am a script writer.

I got to Lagos with nothing on me and nowhere to stay. I slept in a site they are building for days and managed to follow them to do painting work I never did in my life and saved up money and got a small room for 35k and agent and agreement for 30k totalling 65k.

I moved in. Trouble started again, she kept calling that she wants to join me else she tell mum and her dad everything. I begged her that I don’t have a job and there is no means of income here. She should wait till I get a job she refused, I was forced to send 10k to her to come with agreement that we will stop and she will look for a job while I look for too.

Before she came I met my ex, we never broke up, we only lost contact. So we met and she was not in any relationship but she has had 6 relationships after we lost contact. My ex came to spend time with me. She came on Saturday and my sister came in on Monday and met her, you needed to see her face and reaction. I introduced them.

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My sister refused to eat or talk. My girl was very uncomfortable and decided to leave the next day. My sister began to display. Why would I bring another woman after I deflowered her and all that. She picked a knife to stab herself, she stopped on the condition that I say I don’t love my girl that it’s her I love.

I Said all that because I don’t want her to hurt herself. Welles agmfter she came. She started touching me and I resisted, she picked a knife, she said it’s because of my girl, she wants to die. I was so scared, this is how I have been living with her.

My girl in the other end is saying I brought in my wife claiming she’s my sister, that if I want to prove it that she is not my wife I should let her come again. I said ok, I begged my sister that my girl is come she should please behave well, she said ok. My girl came and reverse was the case. My sister even hid her phone in the room and left it to camera me and my girl.

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That day, it was war and my girl left. Mind you I have not told my girl anything. She left in anger. Now last week i opened a book and saw that my sister has written all what happened between us and what didn’t happen.

The one that vexed me was that she put it that I raped her, I cried and confronted her. I rather die than to rape a girl, I could put my life on the line for any girl who was raped to get justice. Because of this, I left home and go stay in a friend’s place.

My girl called that very day I left home that she’s in my house, I was like but you didn’t tell me, she said mush she tell me before she can visit? I said ok, I will come back on Monday. This past Monday I was on my way, I didn’t see motor because of the lockdown and i didn’t have money for bike, I trekked from festac to jakande before I see bus that took me half way and I used lag to complete my journey home.

Guess what, I didn’t meet my girl at home. She left that even. I got home exactly 8pm and I called her she was on her way home, I became angry that why did she leave. Around 11pm she called me to log on and broke the news.

She said she wanted to collect some music on my sister’s phone and she mistakenly sent a recorded voice she saw there and it played and what was there was my conversation with my sister, that I promised to marry her, that I don’t love my girl that she is the one forcing herself on me.

That we have been sleeping together for a year now and she has aborted for me. All what happened I the village my girl vomited it. And called it a quit. The only thing I told her was, that she liked about the recording because my sister never had a phone then, so how did it record it? And all what she said I never said that.

I know I was going to tell her but I wanted to get something doing first. Now my sister has ruined my relationship and has turned me into something else in my house. She shouts at me anyhow, abuses me, she has slapped me twice in from of people. Even people are doubting I I’m her elder brother.

All this I endure because I don’t want people to know the atrocity we committed. Please don’t judge me too much because I have already judged myself. All that is in my head now is suicide. I have lost everything, I don’t know what I am living for. I never enjoyed it one bit cos it’s a taboo.

I never had it in mind that I was going to the village to sleep with my half sister. I regret ever being born and I cursed the day I stepped my foot into that village. I regret having her as a sister and i regret everything we did.

Did I tell you she went to my phone to collect my girl’s number and called her. She questions every chat I do on Facebook or Whatsapp, she questions me anytime I change password and force me to tell her my password else she kills herself or tell everybody what is going on.

Sorry for the long story. (But I dont know what else to do,I need your advise)

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My Relationship With My Half Sister Wants To Destroy My Life-Pt 2
Jzhane
A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J

37 COMMENTS

  1. This is sad I feel your pain, your sister has a problem and needs psychiatric help u have to tell your mum it’s going to be very difficult to do considering the guilt u feel but that’s the only way out pray for forgiveness don’t beat yourself up we all make mistakes it just comes in different shades so don’t hurt yourself try n talk to ur mum first then other things will follow so sorry for your pain.it is well

  2. Brother, call a family meeting and explain all that you two have been doing together. Also explain to your ex too and ask for her forgiveness.
    Then ask God for forgiveness and start a knew chapter. Cut all ties with your step sister and move on with your life. You don’t need any relationship for now.

  3. Hmmmmmm.
    My brother , you need to man up and travel to the village to inform your parents. After which make a police statement that she has been threatening to kill herself and get ready for burial incase she goes ahead to kill herself. It may sound difficult but the truth is ,you cant continue to live like this.

    • Hmm.. Dear poster!! Its better to confess than to be pushed around like this. Call a meeting and tell everyone everything that has transpired between the two of you and make up your mind to face the consequence of your action even if it takes walking away so as to have peace of mind.

  4. I said in part one that I smell a set up.your sister did set you up because she saw your weakness for her and she made you sleep with her to use that to torment and manipulate you to doing her evil bidding.
    I will advise you to call you mum and confess to her because your sister will continue to use that against you and you will keep sleeping with her.

    Ask your mom to come take her back or you leave that house to another place without her knowing because she will either kill you or kill herself.

    • U need to confess to the family all u did, including ur gf. And ur sis really needs help psychologically. Ask for forgiveness from God cos without this, it will be difficult to move on with ur life. Wish u well

  5. It is a sick and sad state you got yourself into there. The way it is, you have to tell your mum. Doing this helps you achieve three things;
    1. You get to give the true story first before your sister tells her distorted story.
    2. Then she will not have anything to blackmail you with. You can get to do the right thing.
    3. Your sister needs help and you people can help her get help.
    Please stop having s*x with her. You’re only digging a deeper pit for yourself.
    God bless you.

  6. The girl probably have this thing called Borderline Personality Disorder. She seriously needs help. The brother needs to let the family know what has been going on, he should confess in order to move on with his life, if not the girl will keep making him a victim

  7. Hmmm…

    Trying to conceal the bad deed is leading to blackmail and abuse from your half sister, why don’t you let your parents know, go to the village with your half sister and explain the whole thing to them. It going to be messy, your parents will be disappointed, it’s better to face that consequences than to live with the threat from your half sister. Then forgive yourself, since you’ve admitted that you did wrong and stay away from your half sister, if you must relate with her, there should be strong boundaries and have some respect for yourself too.

    I think you don’t need to be in a relationship now, because you have a lot of self discovery to do, you need to find who you really are so that people won’t manipulate you with ease.

    • I see that girl as an agent of Satan. Call your mother and open up to her though it is not easy. Once you tell her, the next thing is send the girl out of your house.

  8. Just call your mum or whoever that u can explain all to in the family. Let them knw everything without hiding anything.

    Peace is better than regret.

    God will help you

  9. He that covereth his sins will not proper but he that confesseth and forsake his sin shall Obtain mercy says the word.
    Brother the only way out now is to tell your parents what Happened between you both before she did.
    Killing your self isn’t the way out of this mess. Sucide is never an option. Please let your parents know every details of what happened between you both and seek for forgiveness. God will help you.

  10. The mistake is already done now they way forward.
    Going to the village will cost him money of which we don’t know if he had enough to come back.
    Call them on phone, (mum and step dad I guess) tell them, apologize then work and save money. Please leave both your girl and step sister.
    You are a man and need a clear mind to figure out what you want to do with your life. These ladies won’t help you because you are always trying to do good by them both.
    Disappear and start afresh. Get your life straight and move on. Going to the village should be a no no for now until everything is settle with you.
    Change your number so aunty step sister won’t get to contact you. Forgive yourself and move on so you don’t die young.
    You are already somewhat experiencing polygamy and it’s never peaceful.

  11. This is a messy situation and I believe God will bring you out.
    The girl just played a smart one on you and you need a bit of intelligence work to do so as to wriggle out of her trap.
    First, ask God for mercy. Pray sincerely and ask for God’s forgiveness. This will bring peace and sanity back to your being.
    Then, you need to do some voice recording of your conversation with her without her knowledge. Make her threaten you with suicide if you don’t sleep with her. Bring out words from her.
    Then, either you invite your mum or you tell the girl you want both of you to visit the village. Anyone that is possible. When in the presence of your mum, (if your step dad can be present, good), confess ALL you have done with her from the beginning. Tearfully ask for forgiveness from them and tell them you don’t want her to live with you again.
    I know she will deny, that is when your recorded conversation will pay off.
    I believe God will help and bring you out. Amen

  12. Haba…. The solution is to start talking, Ur silence encouraged the whole thing…. U really didn’t have to send transport money to her when Ur trying to stay away…. Don’t fall for her minds games, and her threats.

  13. The mistake you made was bringing her back to your house, pls send her back to the village and then make peace with your girl friend. Send her back pls and if possible change your address so she doesn’t come back on her own to look for you.

  14. This is really serious than I predicted from the first part. You have entered a deep pit. The only way for you to get back up is to rise up after cleaning up your shit.

    To avoid this taboo from happening again, you need to stay away from your half sister. Since she’s always threatening you with suicide (don’t take that as an empty threat, suicide thoughts & intentions are real), you need to take her back to the village with intention of abandoning her there. So that after cutting ties with her, she could be monitored at home from committing suicide. Before I talk about that fully, let me quickly digress into the issue of you needing to come clean.

    First of all, you need to let your mom know the truth. When you take your sister back to the village, you can tell your mom the truth before leaving but depending on how comfortable you are in telling her face to face or your level of relationship with your mom, you can also tell her on the phone after leaving if you would be uncomfortable in telling her directly.

    If necessary, you can also do a voice record of your deeds on the phone and send it to her. Also secretly record the part where your sister mentioned that she would commit suicide over the matter (by questioning her about it while recording).

    You made so many mistakes to let it get to this stage. One of the big mistakes you later made was that, u still let her traveled to Lagos to stay with u when u were trying to avoid her. You shouldn’t have allowed her to come and join you in Lagos knowing how possessive she is. That should have even been the time you will let her expose you since you didn’t even had the intention of going back to the village again. If she had the boldness to expose you then, she would have carried the whole cross alone.

    It’s never too late to correct that wrong. Now, you just have to take her back to the village (if you don’t have cash to travel to and fro, to avoid getting stranded again, then you might need to borrow it from your friends)
    Do it in such a way that it will be as if you guys want to spend holiday in the village for some weeks. So both of you will need to pack many clothes and other useful things. Then after some days, travel back to Lagos without informing anybody. That’s maybe after informing your mom the shameful truth of what you did. If it is the phone option you want to do, you can tell her when you get to Lagos. Then in Lagos, throw away your sim card to lose touch with anyone from your village (after telling your mom and asking for forgiveness).

    You have done a shameful thing, it is advisable you stay away from your family until you heal up. Also don’t go back home, stay with your friend for the meantime. Then never give up on your hustling. Save up cash & rent another place. So that means you have covered your track and nobody in your family, not even your sister, will be able to locate you easily again. When you have healed up, to continue keeping up with your family, you can be calling your mom only. May God help you. These decisions are not easy to take but be courageous to go through it. Suicide is never a solution to any problem.

    It is well with you !!!!

  15. Tell your mom what is happening,after that you confess your sin,when she treaten you again you tell her that you told your mom everything

  16. U have done so many mistakes from the beginning of the whole thing,,by first of all allowing her in to u,u also allowed her to start blackmailing u for what she started in the first place,n u are Still allowing her have her way with u ,n mind u ,if u don’t open up she will keep blackmailing u into doing more evil,just take her quitely to the village,n don’t tell her y u are taking her there, before she creates more scenes,wen u get there,call ur mother n tell her everything from the beginning,n leave her there n return to Lagos n face ur life,if possible tell ur Mom that she did something to u that made u gave in. After all just to go Church n pray n ask God for Mercies n forgiveness so that ur life can bounce back,do everything possible to avoid that girl, avoid that girl like a plauge,stay away from that girl,she will ruin u more,of u don’t something right now.That girl is pure evil

  17. Pls tell your parents about it so that you can be free from this bondage.Tell your mum and her father

  18. Hello,

    I hope you have read most of the advise here…I need not say much cos you have received so many sound advise. I would only summarize by saying a few things:
    1. You need help with your sister because she has a psychological problem
    2. You need to come clean with your mother before it gets worse. She might actually go ahead with her threat if you do not do something fast
    3. You also need help. Therapy because,incest is not normal. Yes,she came for you but you crossed a line…she is your little sister. You were supposed to be protecting her.

    You need to ask God for forgiveness and renew your mind with God’s word. I would recommend you take this seriously.

    So,go ahead and call your mother right away..ask them to come pick her up now. And they should arrange for her to get psychiatric help.

    Even if she was not your sister…any woman who claims a man as hers and wants to kill herself when another woman is around him definitely needs to get checked for mental illness.

    I pray you do the right thing. Ask God for forgiveness and start your life all over.

    Suicide is NOT an answer. It only makes things worse. You will got to hell for that.And you out your family in grief. That is not worth it.

    But if you ask God for forgiveness,He will forgive you and you will have another chance to live right and better this time.

    I wish you all the best.

  19. Tell the truth to ur mom now I no is not easy but u have to tell her before is too late because one-day the truth will surely come out

  20. You heard it all, best advise you can get from anywhere in the world. Firstly, ask God for forgiveness,then talk to your parent about it and take her home to your parents. Do not contemplate suicide my brother, its a one way ticket to hell and the devil will be glad to recieve you. Yes you have made a mistake, you it can still be corrected. It’s not the end of the world.Jesus still loves you more than you love yourself. God be will you and guide your decision

  21. Hello,
    Firstly, you have to seek God for forgiveness and pray seriously to God to order your steps in the journey of life.
    Call your mum and your step dad and give them the details.
    I’m sure they will help you guys out…your sis needs serious attention.

    Regards

  22. Hummmmm. Suicide is not the solution. Please try to forgive yourself first. Then go ahead and tell your parent all that has happened so they can advice you on what to do.

  23. […] read a story similar to my situation here a few days ago. (Click here for that story). I am actually in a dilemma and I need advise. I am a Nigerian living in Ghana. […]

  24. You need to first repent, confess to your parents and girlfriend. Ensure your half sister get help and you two have to stop seeing each other.

  25. You are very weak. Get angry and take charge of your situation. Why think of suicide…
    You have to first open the secret and let family know what exactly happened before she gives her own fake story. Then open up to your girlfriend and ask for her forgiveness… Then get that girl out of your house…

    Your weakness made lead you to this stage. Do you really think she would have killed herself. Even if she does. If you have open up the secret. Her bloods won’t be on your hands. She needs help from a psychiatrist not you

  26. In all you’ve said so said your fear is the shame of people knowing what you did with your sister but I will advise you face your fears come out clean tell your family and ask God for forgivness me suicide isn’t going to love the problem.

  27. This is a very overwhelming story. I can imagine your frustration but the only way out of this is to tell the truth. It will definitely be hard to bear but embrace the consequences of your actions or else you will have to live in this guilt and bondage for the rest of your life at least if it doesn’t drive you to commit suicide as you have already mentioned. Take your sister to the village with you, spill the truth, embrace the outcome, return back to the city, pray for forgiveness and start a new life…..my opinion.

  28. Hmm your story is not good at all… What you should do now is to look for a way to tell your mum in a peaceful way she will understand and if he did not do anything better go to police station and make a statement cos of the way she is treating you and find your girl and explain everything to her
    Or better find a place to go that she will never see you and change your contact
    Also pray to God for help
    Be very careful

  29. It’s so unfortunate that what started as a good gesture to protect a sister turned to be a worst night mare of your life. Am not judging cause am aren’t better than you physically but than God am righteous in him not by my own works. My brother the damage has been made but you can’t keep doing the wrong things and expect a positive results, run for your life and your only escape is telling your mum the truth and repent man may judge or condemn you but you will break free from the torture of the cell you are in. Your sister will keep manipulating you as long as you don’t speak the truth suicide is not a solution it’s only a free passport to hell, man up brother man and face your fears. This time do the right thing praying for you.

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