Yesterday, I read about the lady who cheated on her man and is asking for forgiveness. (Click here to read the story). This story made me want to share mine. I can say that this lady really f*cked up and its best she moves away because even if the man forgives her and marries her,their marriage will never be a happy one.
Here is my story:
7 Years ago,I married my husband after dating for 3 years. At the time we got married,things were tight for us financially. I got pregnant immediately and I could not work cos I was very sick. In that time,my husband had to take a contract in Benue state.
We needed the money so he had to go even though I was heavily pregnant and sickly. Then,mobile phones were not so reliable. I missed my husband so much. Even when I had my baby,he was not around. He came once in a month but I felt really lonely.
After that contract,more contracts came for him successively in Benue and Abuja. He was travelling alot. Our kid practically grew up seeing dad once on a month or two. My needs too suffered. I thought if I went back to work,I would focus on the job and not miss him so much.
I got a job as a PA. And everything was cool but my boss was having issues with his wife who was a career woman. Before you could say jack:we bonded over the absence of our spouses at the time and we started having an affair. It killed me to betray my husband but I couldn’t understand how he would stay without s*x for months …I low key suspected he was cheating but I never had proof.
Eventually, my husband found out I was cheating cos one day he came into town when I was not expecting him. He came to pick me up from work to surprise me and got there only to find out that I was not at work. He was told by security that I had closed and gone home.
He got home and waited outside for me to return:only for him to see me being dropped off by my boss around 11pm,after giving me a kiss. My husband went livid and I thought our marriage was over. I tried to lie but he swore that it was truly over except I told the truth. I wanted to save my marriage so I told him everything.
I told him how I was lonely and its been more than 3 years since he lived with us. I told him I was sorry…there was no excuse but I was emotionally deprived. It took us a while but my husband eventually forgave me.
He started taking only contracts that would enable him spend more time with his family. I thought things would go back to normal but they never really did. My husband and I grew apart more and more. I realized that he was always trying to forget me sleeping with another man.
For 6 months we didn’t have s*x. And when we did,he cried after. I felt so worthless and regretted my actions. I even started thinking of divorce. My friends blamed me for owning up to my indiscretions. They said I should have denied it to the later cos my husband would never forgive me as men do not truly forgive cheating by their wives.
That was about five years after our marriage. It was a truly difficult time for all of us. Until one day, I noticed that our new neighbor that is a single mother who happens to be from the same town was becoming close. The woman has two teenage children but every time she needs something she calls my husband.
Calls my husband to buy fuel,to help her when her car has issues. They call each other sister and brother but I see the woman seriously flirting with my husband. When I complained to my husband: his answer was: not everyone cheats on their spouses.
That statement broke me. But I have to swallow it. I caused it. So I watch that woman all over my husband. Sometimes she cooks and sends to us. Knowing its actually for my husband. I want to warn her but I know it would upset my husband. But what can I do? How do I stop this insult?
Its only a matter of time before this woman sleeps with my husband. That is if they have not already done so. So,because I cheated…I cannot complain when my husband is flirting with another woman. I wished I never crossed that line. It feels like my indiscretions gave him licence to misbehave.
That is why that lady from yesterday’s story should just walk away quietly. Its for better.
Now,I am wondering: is this what I am going to bear for the rest of my life? Should I walk away? Should I confront the woman? Their behavior is making me a laughing stock in our compound yet my husband sees nothing wrong with it.
My marriage is not a happy one…please advise me…
Anonymous Lively Stones Facebook Member