My marriage is falling apart, please help me. I been a silent follower for some months now. I like the way you give advise. Please share my story but hide my identity. I have been married for four years to a very good man but my husband does not love me. In fact he is in love with someone else.
I met my husband five years ago. He was in a relationship at that time. But his family did not like the lady he was with. And his family are very religious people. They actually told him that there were several visions that lady was not his wife.
So,there were having several issues,the family too did not support their union. When I met him,he told me he was trying to forget her and we started seeing each other. When she found out about us,the lady broke up with him. That cleared the way for us.
We are from the same place. The family welcomed me with open arms. I got pregnant 6 months later and we quickly arranged for our wedding. We were happy and moving on with our lives. Everything was good. I had my second child last year. That was when I started noticing the distance between me and my husband.
I thought it was because of the pregnancy. He refused to make love to me most times. So,I thought it was because of my big stomach. But it did not change after I put to bed last October. Since then,our marriage just became more and more distant. He would not touch me and when I make advances,he would reject me.
I would cry and ask him what I did to him. He would say nothing. This continued for 3 months. I had to call my pastor’s wife. She spoke to him and he told her that his heart is no longer in the marriage. That he is not attracted to me anymore. Just like that?
They started to counsel us but he never showed any interest. I have been praying and fasting for months about this matter. His family also became involved. Everyone asked me to be patient and prayerful.
When I prayed,God opened my eyes that my husband is still in love with that his ex. So,I discreetly checked his phone which I have never done before. And there is was,he was chatting with her. Obviously,he and her have been talking for a long time and possibly sleeping together.
He apologized to her several times for not standing by and listening to his family break them apart. They have daily chats. Some very sexual daily chats. He is begging her to accept him back because he is not happy in his marriage to me. I could not read further. I was heartbroken.
I told my sister what I discovered and she warned me not to say anything. That if my husband find out that I went through his phone,I will only push him further to that lady. Everyone is asking me to be calm. But my heart is bursting every day. I cannot take it anymore.
I did not force myself into this marriage. My husband was the one who came to me that he wanted to forget about his ex. I did not force him. Why is he trying to humiliate me now? I feel so bad. Sometimes,I feel like confronting that lady to leave us alone. We have 2 children and we were happy until 8 months ago.
A friend of mine has asked me to go use Kayanmata (special oil to attract men) to get my husband back. She advised me to use traditional means to get my husband back. I don’t know if I can use it as a Christian but people say its good and after all, its for my man…
Every day,I see I am loosing my husband. What do I do? He will not listen to counselling. I have prayed and prayed. I feel like he wants me to be fed up and leave. He might even leave me…I am so scared. He does not care about anything …even the children, he does not play with them anymore.
I love my husband and I never planned on divorcing. Not so young with two young children. What can I do? Is the Kayanmata my only hope?Will there be any repercussions? Please I will be waiting for your views and advise.
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