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My Girlfriend Is My Dream Wife But She May Not Be A Life Partner -Please Advise


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My Girlfriend Is My Dream Wife But She May Not Be A Life Partner -Please Advise

I need your advise. My name is Andy (not real name). I am a 35 years old man. I run a profitable IT business and all I wish for,is to get married to someone who can be a very good partner to me.

You see, I grew up having nothing. I struggled to be where I am today and I thank God for his blessings. While I have seen my struggle pay off in my business,I have not been so lucky in love. My longest relationship was four years. But we broke up because she was getting impatient.

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She could not see the potential in me and was always demanding and complaining. Even though we loved each other,I was not happy,she could not wait for me. At the time,my business was having a slow run. Things were difficult. She felt I was not going to provide well for her,so she moved on.

Ever since,I have been very careful with who I date. Meeting girls is never a problem. They all flock around me. Its just that I am yet to find someone with the same beauty and brains that I desire.

I have always known I do not want to work for someone in my life. So I need a partner that can also be my business partner. The ladies I come across,its either they are too materialistic or gold diggers or just lazy mentally. So,I dated just for fun (s*x) until I met my current girlfriend.

We met at function a year ago. She is smart and intelligent and very beautiful. She is not into business but she is a top advertising executive in the business. We clicked fast. The chemistry is great and I wish she could be the one.

I said,wish because even though she is smart at what she does,she does not seem interested in my business. I have tried to make her realize that I would like for her to take interest but she said she has her own goals and that my goal in career is not her goal.

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Like I said,my dream is to build a family business empire. My girl,whom I love so much,has said she wants to also build her empire in advertising for herself. I thought I would have to let her go since she is more focused on her goals instead of building mine with me. But to be honest,I am stuck in love with her and cannot get her out of my mind………..

Maybe I should give up the idea of the woman I marry must be my business partner? What do you think?

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Another thing is, because of her industry,she to stay abreast in a lot of things like entertainment and celebrity. I see that as unserious kind of lifestyle. I mean,you need to see how she stays glued to the TV or her phone watching celebrity gossip or BBNaija (Big Brother Naija) or some stupid reality shows.

Like I said, I love her. She is sexy,and intelligent …I just wish she was more into my line of business more. But she is not business minded. She is entertainment freak. She does not like to be serious in things like business finances…she is more like into creativity and stuff.

My friends feel that she might change when we get married. Maybe later in life,she might pick up interest. That I may not find the exact kind of person I want but they may grow to like what I like in future.

Do you think that is possible? Or should I let her go and continue to find a woman that will love my business as passionately as I do?


Anonymous Lively Stones Facebook Fan


Photo Credit:Best Life Online


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My Girlfriend Is My Dream Wife But She May Not Be A Life Partner -Please Advise
A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J


  1. I think you are being selfish here..if you really want this lady let her fly because she wasn’t wired the way you think she should be wired.do your thing and let her do her thing if you really want to be with her and don’t allow your desires to destroy what is supposed to give you fulfilment..best of luck.

  2. It won’t be easy to find a woman who will leave her profession or career in pursuit of your own business,you have to erase the impression of my woman must build my business with me.Women of this present day wants to also have their companies and empires.Pls continue to love your girl and maybe she might decide to build with you,no one knows what the future holds.

  3. I think you are expecting too much. She grew up having her own ambitions and source of inspiration doesn’t make her unserious. Count how many years she grew up without you and your business ideas.
    I think you should let her be. like your friends said,she may grow interest sometime later. But even if she doesn’t, it is still ok. Two sources of income in a family is not a disaster.
    I beg, let her be.

  4. We all have our ideas of a life partner/marriage which is necessary.
    Maybe you really need to weigh your options and prioritize the most valuable. She may not be everything you desire but do you see her as a wife?
    Also consider that you may also not be all that she want.
    If you decide to go ahead, you must be willing to support her dreams and she must be willing to support your dreams too ( support doesn’t mean business partner, but believing in each other and bring out the best in each other). If you can’t support each other, then don’t go into marriage.

  5. What really off me was the longest he has dated is four years.. Brother how many years do you intend dating another man’s child.. 10 year I presume?? All I see is selfish and self centred interest.. U meet a woman who is a top adversting executive, a woman in top if her career and you intend her to drop hers and carry ur business on her head.. Brother can you do that for her after all everybody wNts a supportive boyfriend

  6. Hello sir,
    I congratulate you for God’s multiple blessings…. including this beautiful lady.

    If you really love this lady as you claim, don’t trouble her to help you build your business empire.

    Just let her be for now ! Go ahead with your plans to marry her if there’s No other reason beside this point.

    She’s ambitious, she has visions…..give her full support to attain her goals….it’s to your credit. Somewhere in the nearest future, she may come around to your business and help you build your “Family Business Empire”.

    Be patient and allow things to work out naturally.

    You may not have everything you desire, or aim at in this life but God will make sure you have the best of it all.


  7. Everyone has spoken well. Its now left for you to decide on whether to go ahead with her or not. The way God wired her is different from the way God wired you. Leave her to fulfil her destiny while you fulfil yours.

  8. I see a bit of selfishness on your part bros. Career or business shouldn’t be the criteria for choosing a life partner at all.
    You enjoy what you do, fine, she enjoys hers as well, why shouldn’t that be fine?
    You said she is everything you wish for in a woman and you love her which is reciprocal on her part, what else do you want?
    If your heart is not with the marriage thing BECAUSE of BUSINESS PARTNERSHIP, I think you better let her go

  9. Hello Sir,

    Do I detect a slight display of ego in you?

    I think you have set your priorities right.

    Yes…some people…well,some ladies are not that entrepreneurial but they are smart in other areas and not yours specifically…

    If you find a good woman who is smart and ambitious and independent and makes you happy…all you need to do is support her dreams.

    Be her biggest supporter and she will be yours without you asking.

    Who says you cant help her build her advertising empire and later in life,…she supports you to build yours so you both are great in 2 sectors?

    Do not loose a good woman by painting an unrealistic picture.

    Well, if you want ….you can be patient…maybe a woman who can be your perfect fit….that is…if you want to keep waiting. I do not know how long but God is with you.

    So in the meantime…either you appreciate the great gift you have now or you let her go and blossom with someone more deserving.

    All the best.


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