HomeAdviceMy Feelings Are Stuck With Two Men -Please Help My Confusion

My Feelings Are Stuck With Two Men -Please Help My Confusion


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My Feelings Are Stuck With Two Men -Please Help My Confusion 

My name is Angela (not real name) I am 28 year old, I am a civil servant here in Asaba (not real location). I am in a relationship with a guy in my place before I got work here. The guy really love me show all manner of care for me.

This same guy is a believer,all the moment we spent together ,the guy didn’t touch me. The problem though is that I do not have feelings for him. No matter how much I try to show him the same feelings he has for me . I have always found it difficult to love him like he loves me.

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Recently, I met a another guy. He is ok. He works in the Bank. The problem with this guy is that he does not care like the first guy.He has never invited me to his house. So I can know where he lives. He says he is staying wit his uncle.

He said that  his uncle wife may not allow him to bring a woman come to their house because of her ex girlfriend that travelled out the country. That the Uncle’s wife really love the ex girlfriend. That they were always gisting with her anything dat happened in their family.

However this  guy told me that,he cannot marry his ex because he does not want any woman that would be controlling him. He said he wants me to be patient with him to get his own apartment. And that is the excuse he has been giving me for the past one years now. That is his only excuse.

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Ma, He always come to my place anytime that we want to see, and he goes back. Most times,his phone is always on silent when he is with me. We have fought about this attitude of his many times. He said he is used to keeping his phone on silent.

The first guy,despite my attitude towards him (showing him I don’t love him as much as he does) he didn’t change. He still shows care to me. Now I am confused ma. He just got a job in March this year. And he is asking me to come down to his place so dat we can put things in other.

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He is the only one dat use to tell me about  marriage. The second guy has not said anything about marriage since we been together. I need your advise. Though first time i went to pray about d first guy,they said he is ok for me. I also went to pray about the second guy,they also Said he was ok. I do not know what to do ma.

Anonymous Lively Stones WhatsApp Member

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My Feelings Are Stuck With Two Men -Please Help My Confusion
A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J


  1. Let me first say you are totally not serious, you have a man that is taking care of you and you’re complaining… well the moment you lose him forget it, it will take like forever before you can get such a man…. I’m not saying you should marry someone you don’t love but please stop wasting his time…
    For the second guy he’s into a serious relationship and he’s just keeping u for fun.. cos he doesn’t want his family to know about you cos u are just a side chick….
    My advice go for the man that can take good care of you.. marriage is beyond love, care is alsoan essential ingredients.. but then the second guy can never marry cos he’s cooling off with u. You are the one taking it serious…. but please don’t deceive the first guy by leading him on ooo that will be pure wickedness

  2. Please please and please, follow your heart…You ain’t stuck between the two guys,you don’t just know what to do….I will advice you go for the first one because the other guy is nothing but a player…

    • Please go for the first guy,that other guy I a scam oo,just forget the bank guy n focus on the other guy,that loves u more, it’s beta that way,let the love frm the guy be more than ur own,becos with time u will learn to love him

  3. Why do people ask questions they already know the answers too?Bia nne ,you better marry the one that cares and loves you,he is even talking about marriage and you are there talking about somebody who is not serious,wait ooooo,is it because he works In bank,bia nne who bank help? You better learn to love him too,try as much as you can to love that innocent young man oooo,and don’t disappoint him.If you know you would waste his time,tell him on time oooo,so that he can move on.

  4. Hello,

    Its obvious man no 2 is not being totally honest with you.

    That excuse of not being able to introduce you to his family is a scam. He is hiding his family from you for a reason: possibly he is married or has a fiancée that the family is aware of.

    And then arguing with him about his phone is a redflag. Someone with no skeletons will not have any problem when his phone rings out.

    If you want a man who will respect you…man no 1 is your guy. Love is a choice…if you begin to give him a chance,you will find yourself falling in love with him

    Stop comparing other men with him. He is a good man for even asking you to come fix his new apartment with him. That is a sign that he wants to build a future home with you.

    Choose wisely….all that glitters is not good.

  5. Open your eyes wella before you enter gutter. Go for a guy that loves you more which is the first guy. The second guy is a player run for your life


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