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She Wants To Forgive Her Fiancé Who Cheated With A Married Woman -Pls Advise


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She Wants To Forgive Her Fiancé Who Cheated With A Married Woman -Pls Advise

My phones were blazing off the hook. I was seeing it ring on silent mode but I could not pick it up cos I was in a zoom meeting with my boss and other team members. Finally after like 30minutes of meeting, I was able to pick up my phone and return my friend’s call.

First thing Tayo (my friend) asked was: are you sitting down…I asked what for? And she goes, I am in VVV hotel and guess who just came out from a hotel room? I was like: which kind of gist is this…its about to be juicy.

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And my friend goes: I just saw my fiancé come out of hotel room with his friend’s pregnant wife and they are both looking as guilty as can be. Before now, my friend has been telling me that she is not comfortable with her fiancé’s friendliness with his friend wife.

She stated dating her fiancé two years ago and she became friends with his friend and his wife too. They hung out a lot and she noticed that they were all very cool with each other. They accepted her too and she loved their company.

Her fiancé jokingly called his friend’s wife: our wife. They eat from the same plate and that was the first time she found it a bit uncomfortable and she mentioned it to her fiancé but he said there are like brother and sister…and his friend would do the same too.

When his friend was out of town, this lady would come to Tayo’s fiancé’s house and stay till late cos she said she did not like being in the house alone. Lets call Tayo’s fiance Bayo. So Bayo is a cool guy. I like him. He is kind to my girl Tayo. But Tayo always says she just has this weird feelig about Bayo’s friend’s wife.

Tayo is sure this woman has a crush on Bayo but she cannot provide any evidence. So she got the courage and cloned Bayo’s phone. She did not see any explicit chat between them but she saw that she asked him to meet her in a particular hotel on a regular basis. My friend saw when their next meeting is and she planned to follow them.

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Tayo trailed them to a hotel and when they lodged in,Tayo paid off the receptionist and she got their room no. She knocked on their hotel room and she walked into her Fiancé in a bathrobe and his friend’s wife already in her under wear.

At that point,she called me and I didn’t pick up so she started raising hell and everyone came out and she embarrassed the living daylight out of her fiancé and his friend’s wife. Tayo got livid and called this woman’s husband.

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Long story short, Tayo broke up with Bayo but Bayo has been begging Tayo to return to him. That he never meant to hurt her but that his friend and his wife are in an Open marriage meaning, both husband and wife can see other people secretly and they do not mind.

And its true, the friend and his wife are still together. So even though Bayo cheated on her…he didn’t cheat on his friend cos they are a free couple. Bayo has said he  has cut off his friend and his wife to focus solely on Tayo. Tayo is thinking of taking him back and that is where I have a serious problem.

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Like how do you take back a man who cheats on you with his friend’s wife who practice open marriage? Will he not one day ask Tayo for an open marriage? What is to say he is not still seeing this woman in secret.

Tayo said the lady has apologized and promised not to have anything to do with Bayo anymore…..should that be enough? What is going on here? I have told Tayo that she is making a mistake but she thinks I do not understand and that she wants to give him one more chance…that if he does it again…then she will leave him.

That is…if she ever catches him doing it…please advise my friend…cos I already told her that she is being fooled and brainwashed. My friend reads your blog…she will be reading your comments.


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She Wants To Forgive Her Fiancé Who Cheated With A Married Woman -Pls Advise
A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J


  1. There is nothing like open marriage…what we have is adultery. Pls break up with him FAST, this generation we are so all about sex. Pls tell your friend to break off from her fiancee. All those nonsense we call open marriage is ADULTERY, and it takes people to hell fire. I’m sorry for all those who sleep with other people’s wives and husbands and those who commit adultery. When they die they will know the GRAVITY of their sin. Flee sexual immorality

  2. Hello,

    Sometimes it takes some people much longer time to learn from their mistakes.

    Your friend is a grown woman…you have advise…family and friends have too…

    All you can do is pray for her….until she eventually learns.

    Just pray its not too late before she learns from her mistakes…and hope the mistakes dont become so grave that she regrets for a long time.

    Keep praying for her…you said your bit….hold your peace.



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