Home Relationships I Am Ready To Get Married But What Do Ladies Really Want?

I Am Ready To Get Married But What Do Ladies Really Want?

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I Am Ready To Get Married But What Do Ladies Really Want?

Hello ma,

The young man’s story of dating a single mother is what motivated me to send my story. (Read yesterday’s story here). This young man’s story is similar to mine. I am 33 years old and I dated a single mother of 35 years for a year.

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When I met her, I never knew she was married and divorced because she looks so hot and pretty. We met during a trip from Lagos to Abuja. Since then, we became very close. We became even best friends. We would chat and talk to each other every day and I knew she was the one for me.

As soon as I started talking about marriage to her, she became different. I was surprised. She started to complain that I am trying to be controlling cos I am younger than her. My family which she never met,she all of a sudden started saying they will not accept her cos she is divorced and have a baby.

I told her several times that my family will accept anyone I choose. She refused to meet my family. She said I was being pushy cos I wanted her to give my family a chance to meet her before she draws her conclusion. She became withdrawn and when I chat with her, she would not have anything to say.

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Overall, I believe she had a complex cos she was divorced and with a kid. I eventually got tired of waiting and toasting and I left her. Right now, I am dating someone younger than me but this lady is not ready for marriage. She feels she is 23 and wants us to wait another 3 years which is fine by me but I think she is saying that also because she does not want to be tied down.

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Like I said, I am 33. I feel this is a good age to get married as a man. I am mentally and financially ready but I feel my girl asking me to wait for 3 years is just an excuse. After 5 months of broking up with the single mother, she is now texting me and trying to come back.

So my question now is: this single mother whom I love, how do I know that her complex will not be an issue for us if we get married? Just see like my brother’s story from yesterday…I feel ladies sometimes dont know what they want. They want men who will deceive them.

I have bared my heart to two different women…one older than me…another younger but you see the issues they both have…one is not ready cos she feels she is young and there is time…while the other feels she is older than me and that I will be controlling her or my family will not fully accept her cos she has a kid.

If you were in my shoes…what will you do? I need advise…ladies…what do you really want?

 

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I Am Ready To Get Married But What Do Ladies Really Want?
Jzhane
A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J

4 COMMENTS

  1. For the single woman, BE CAREUL, she may have issues but may be a really good person, ask her you want to meet her ex husband, but tell her physically and see her reaction, tell her you also have a child and look serious about it…watch her reaction closely, trust me single mothers can be very manipulating, many of them are most times self centered, after five months she came back, my man she may have been sleeping with her ex husband or some other man or men, you know how sex is the order of the day in this generation, so WATCH IT bro….for the 23 years old lady, she is still young, respect her stand and make sure you also watch it, cos many of these ladies, when they see you are well to do, have a car, good job, can pay there bills, trust me they will run after you cos they have this gentle looking gesture that can deceive a man, but meanwhile its just your money they ate after. So my man, pls BE CAREFUL with both ladies. I wish you the best

    • I will tell u this as young female that is In that kind of shoe that you are right she isnt ready to be tied down by you maybe becuse she isnt sure about you yet..she might like you enough to date you but not enough to marry you and she might like you enough to marry you it a two way thing ..for the single mother if you think you can cope with her then go for her

  2. Reading your story it shows you are ready for marriage and looking at things you are a good man who want a good woman beside you with love and care.most times we ladies don’t really know what we want we feel the man who truely love us are the wrong once’s which we are wrong in my own point of view I feel you should talk to the single mother and let him know how serious you are and you also ready to take care of her kid also tell her to talk to you about her relationship with her ex husband,from their you can know the next step to take.in the other side you waiting for another three years for the other lady is not a good idea I will not advice you to wait ladies ways are not totally prue if you is not possible for you to wait for her let her know and walk away.

  3. Hello,

    You need to understand that women who are single or divorced or widowed have tasted marriage and sometimes have had bad experiences which makes them have trust issues.

    Do not be too hard on her….she appears to be a nice person…you just need to talk to her. I think with reassurances…she will come around just like she is trying to come around now.

    As for the lady who is younger…it appears she is told you her truth…she is not ready. Let her go except you just want to while away time.

    So man…ladies can be complicated but with lots of love and attention and patience…they blossom like flowers and become very loving and giving in return.

    For you to get pure gold…you need to dig deeper….go through some fire…and then, you will be happier with the end result.

    I ‘d say……work on your first woman…you will be happier.

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