HomeAdviceMy Neighbor Is Cheating On Her Husband- Should I Tell Her Husband?

My Neighbor Is Cheating On Her Husband- Should I Tell Her Husband?

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My Neighbor Is Cheating On Her Husband- Should I Tell Her Husband?

Good evening house,

Please I need your advise. We live in the same compound with this woman who has three children. There are 3 other families all living together with us. Since we moved into this compound, a year ago, I and my family have been living fine, mind our business.

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This my neighbor is a full time house wife. The husband works in Port Harcourt, as an Oil worker, I am told. So, she stay at home and takes care of the children. Something happened last week. The children of this my neighbor got back from school and were all sitting outside.

I came in around 6pm and met them outside. I asked where their mother was and they didn’t know. So, I asked them to come into our house. I got their mother’s no from the eldest, a boy of like 8 years. I called and the mother said she was stuck in traffic.

Long story short,she came back around 9.30pm that day. She came in and thanked me profusely for looking after the kids. The next day, she came to me and begged me to allow her children stay in my place till after school. She explained that she got a supply business with a company on the island and that she might be coming back late again.

That day,she came by 10.30pm. My husband did not like the idea. So, I told her,I cannot keep her children anymore. Next day, her children were outside. I ignored them until it began to rain. I had to bring them inside my place. I called this woman for hours…she did not pick up.

When she did, around 7pm,she said she was in traffic…I angrily told her to return before 8pm or I will send her children back to her door. She said ok. She thought she ended the call but she did not know the line was still on. That was how, I heard her talking to a man.

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Before God who made me…I wish what I heard was a lie but she was talking to a man like she was in the middle of having s*x. She was moaning and laughing and saying…hurry up and kiss me, make me c*m…harder baby…yes baby…

I stared at the phone in disbelief. I cut it and called back again…several times…she did not pick up. She returned by 10.56pm that day. My husband was livid when I told him what happened. He banned me from taking in those children.

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Since that day,these children have been staying outside while their mother is doing whatever she is doing. I feel so upset at her…for abandoning her children and cheating on her husband. I feel like talking to her and telling her I know what she has been doing.

I also feel like telling her husband…cos not only is she cheating….she is doing it at her children’s’ expense…and making me feel bad for not taking them in. My children see them outside and always feel sorry for them. My other neighbors are hardly around. So ,its just them outside until late at night when their mother comes back from her contract or affair.

Please what do I do? How can a mother be so heartless…how do I help the children without disobeying my husband and aiding the woman to cheat more. Cos, if I take the children in, she will feel more comfortable to do her evils.

If you were in my shoes…what will you do?

 

Anonymous

 

Photo Credit: womenshealth

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My Neighbor Is Cheating On Her Husband- Should I Tell Her Husband?
Jzhane
A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J

9 COMMENTS

  1. Please call her to order,if she refuses please find a way to get her husband’s number and tell him how his children have been staying outside each time they come back from school, just start with that, don’t tell him any other thing oooo,he will find out himself with time so that dem no go say na you scatter person marriage.Yeye dey smell,nonsense and ingredients

  2. The husband if an oil worker probably spends up to 3 weeks or months on the rig or so. But that doesn’t bring the excuse to cheat.
    You and your husband should sit the woman down and talk sense into her. Probably that’s what she needs. Then keep trying your best for her children.

    If she wants to continue, it’s her choice. But one day everything would come in the open. Even the children would report her when their daddy comes home. So just talk to her, and keep doing what you can for the children.
    She maybe feeling lonely and needs attention probably that’s why she’s cheating. But not at the expense of your kids. Cheating is totally wrong. Some women jus want to be free. Motherhood and marriage is just a formality for them.

  3. For me I will talk to both man and woman after I must have spoken to the woman telling her am aware she isn’t doing any supplies rather she’s cheating on her husband… taking her back to the conversation we had on phone and what I heard her tell a man when she thought she had put off the phone..

    I will tell her the negative impact it has on her children..I will tell her if she is planning to pack out of the place I will tell her husband what I know…( Because if she knows I already know she might plan to move and the children will be exposed to more danger…since she doesn’t even care about the kids)

    And when she doesn’t change I will tell her husband in front of her to look for a business nearby instead of having the wife go to the island to be doing business and leaving the kids outside till late in the night..I won’t say what I know she should tell her husband the kind of supplies she’s being doing because I know her husband is not aware his wife is going out and leaving his kids outside till late in the evening..

  4. Talk to the woman and let her know you are aware of her infidelity but her children should be of utmost priority to her. If she is not willing to change then tell her she will be reported to child welfare for negligence and she will face the law.

  5. One thing people don’t know is you can’t change an adulterer, you cannot, sex is so sweet, sebi you said you abandons her children till late night all because of sex, so you see you can’t talk her to change, even if she appears to stop trust me she will only be smarter in hiding it. I strongly advise you to tell her husband, I mean when he comes back tell him but make sure the woman is not at home, PLS TELL THE HUSBAND, its so painful for a man to go working so hard and his wife is sleeping around and I’m sure she spend money on that stupid man she is having sex with, if the man doesn’t believe tell him to find ways to check her phone, I’m saying so cos I can’t imagine children staying out late cos an adulterous woman is cheating, imagine if one of these kids were kidnapped, you will feel guilty. Make sure you don’t tell the woman to stop, trust me you can’t change an adulterer, when the husband comes tell him don’t let your husband know that you told the man, if he insists tell him to pretend he is traveling to work and see how his kids are always outiside to late night and let him check his wife’ phone. WE MUST NOT GIVE ADULTERY A BREATHING SPACE. PLS TELL THE MAN, save him from the WICKED WOMAN, have you also thought that those kids may not be his own or one of the kids may not be his own. Tell the man. I am Akin.

  6. It’s kind of risky telling her husband cause you might be perceived as a home breaker…. Will have said you talked to the lady about her extra martial affair and the danger she is exposing her kids to but from experience cause same happened to me, I will just say you mind your business and do the little you can for the kids as regards their safety…..

  7. […] My neighbor came to me crying two days ago. She is a young mother with two sets of twins. Meaning, she had a set of twins two years ago and this year, she had another set. So, at age 28, she has 4 young children under the ages of 2. But that is not the issue. The issue is that, because of the pressure of taking care of these children especially getting pregnant so close after the first set, she had to get a house help to assist. […]

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