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My Boyfriend Is Giving Me Mixed Messages: Why Is He ghosting Me?


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My Boyfriend Is Giving Me Mixed Messages: Why Is He ghosting Me?

Its almost a year since we dated. I met my boyfriend through a friend and he taught me how to love . I’ve never been into a relationship before and this is my first.  Everything was ok and perfect until 3 months ago.

We had a quarrel and over one month no one was talking to each other. I felt uneasy and I wasn’t at fault too so I messaged him and told him he doesn’t care about me. He later called and said he’s sick and had been thinking a lot and that he’s not after our arguments.

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So I thought he needed time on his own so I will just message to see how he is doing and go my way . This thing continued and on my birthday, he didn’t even pay a visit or anything, he just posted one ugly picture of me and that’s all. I was very sad and waited patiently for him because the day wasn’t over yet.

I sent a message after my birthday how I felt and a whole lot. He then replied we should have a break and he’s not okay so we will decide later. I couldn’t bare it so I blocked him but later unblocked. I forgot about everything and posted something which he reacted.

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We then got back to normal but he was ignoring me. The moment I sends him a message,he leaves online.  He sometimes choose not to reply my messages. I was still there until one Sunday,I messaged him and after a reply he left online.

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I left 2 messages but he never read until when he was ok and he asked me how I was doing. I was very busy and just when I was replying, I had a call and forget. I remembered but I think if he loves me he could have at least asked why I have him blue ticks but he hasn’t till yet.

All my other friends I didn’t mind because I was busy did messaged or call to find out. I think am worrying him and this was  just a test to know how he loves me but i haven’t heard from him still.

He has once told me that I shouldn’t let him go and a time will come That there will be less communication and one may think the love is gone. Reading old chats gets me confuse everyday.  Am confused and I don’t know if he loves me. I need advice

Please keep me anonymous
Photo Credit:thetimes
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My Boyfriend Is Giving Me Mixed Messages: Why Is He ghosting Me?
A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J


  1. You see my dear I didn’t bother reading till the end because it wasn’t worth it..
    A man that cannot treat you right in a relationship won’t do that when you’re together on marriage.. I’ll advice you leave him alone.. forget him..he might be seeing someone else and he is not worth the trouble.
    I want you to concentrate on your work and move on someday very soon someone who deserves you will come around and you will know him when you eventually meet him.. good luck

  2. From what I read. You are just playing mind games to see if he loves you. Everyone is trying to protect his or her heart which is understandable. But these mind games in a relationship often leads to more problems. You are ghosting him also by ignoring his message and not reaching out to him and waiting for him to contact you. The same thing you are accusing him of.

  3. Sister, calm down and stop stressing over nothing. If he said he needs a break give him a break. Stop over thinking. Be busy about your life. You can check up on him to see if he is fine but stop pressuring for a relationship. Nobody likes to be choked. Focus on yourself and the right person will show up.

  4. Lov yourself sister. Make sure you are not the one at fault while you complain of him. Love yourself, trust me it’s solves many problems even when the one you love leaves you. Love you sister. I am Akin.

  5. Dearie move on with your life. If he said he needs space give him space. In your mind you know the relationship is broken you are just in denial to see it. It’s as hurtful and painful as they get. Just leave him and make be on with your life.
    Hope his change in behaviour not start when you probably had sex with him since you said he’s your first.
    Move on sister.
    I wish you the very best.
    God bless!

  6. Sister a so visible and written on the wall that he is personally not ready to be serious with you if he is serious you will know and feel it…when relationship is swt and rosy they always say dont leave me dobt let that little talk hold you down forget him and move on you might think it not easy but once you try harder and focus on something else you will see it very easy to let goso dont break yourself in the process of keeping a forced relatuonship

  7. Sis…
    You do not have a boyfriend…I am so sorry but that boy or man is not your friend…he does not want you and you have to be careful before you begin to seem desperate and you become a victim.

    He is toying with your heart…he sees you are being naive and he has no problems playing with you and leaving you in the end…

    A more deserving man will find you…but you have to carry yourself with self dignity…do not fall for mixed messages…if they want you…they should be decent enough to woo you and respect you and never give mixed messages.

    No time to cry over a little boy…no mature man treats a lady like this…

    Mature men…not necessarily in age respect and take care of women they love…

    This one is not a boyfriend material and cannot be a husband material at all…

    Thank God…learn the lesson and move on…


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