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My Ex Is Everything I Want In A Husband & I Am Confused About My Boyfriend-Pls Advise


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My Ex Is Everything I Want In A Husband & I Am Confused About My Boyfriend-Pls Advise

Please make my email anonymous and post. I just recently came across you on FB and I would need your Godly advice and that of your followers.

Last year, I broke things with my ex because he was going through a rough path. I tried my best to support him but I couldn’t any longer because it was telling on my mental health.

While dating my ex, I was introduced to a guy  who is based oversees and wanted a wife. We got chatty for a day and It seems to me he was kinda proud maybe because I loved my bf then. I didn’t continue the chat with him.

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Now the main issue. My ex wants me back. To be truthful, I want him too cos I still love him. He’s someone who wants the best for me. Advises me when I need it. He supports me in the little way he can and offer prayers to God on my behalf.

Like he’s the man I wish for. I don’t feel judged when with him. I can definitely be myself. We are like best of friends. The only problem stopping us from getting married is his inability to have a job. He’s job hunting.

Also, this New guy is back. He has the means to start a family. He’s is godly, quotes the bible and fears God. I think he’s a good man but my heart is hesitant. I don’t know if he’s someone who would support me in my career as I’m a career person.

He had this expectations of me because of what they told him about me. I’m scared because what about if I’m not what he envisage? My mum feels I should give him a chance because to her you never can know.

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My spiritual mother says so too because the new guy comes from a good family and would help my family financially. I’m confused here. I do not want to follow their advice because it seems to me it’s just the money.

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My ex even though he’s scared to loose me, is saying I should go be with him if it’s the will of God. Prior to the time both men started seeking me out, I had a dream where I was told to be patient. That the right man will stay.

I want to be happy and also enjoy my marriage. But will I be with this new guy? I have started fasting and prayer for confirmation from God but I still need your advice. Help a confused lady.

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Photo Credit:popsugar



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My Ex Is Everything I Want In A Husband & I Am Confused About My Boyfriend-Pls Advise
A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J


  1. Hello Sister. Your spiritual mother said you should marry the other guy cos he will assist your family financially..some people are really wicked. I don’t know what to tell you who to choose. But don’t ever marry a man cos of money, many ladies do this which is WICKEDNESS. Marry the person you love and you know you love the person genuinely, I’m not saying someone that gives you good sex cos sex before marriage is a SIN, even though a lot of people do it doesn’t make it right, and many ladies who think they are in love are actually not in love but in lust. I pray GOD leads you. GOD bless you.

  2. Prayer is the key
    Also write out what you want in a marriage. Don’t let money be your judge because life is more than money, however, financial stability is necessary in any marriage.
    Don’t marry someone when you heart is with someone else. To some people, marriage is just something you do when you get to certain age, which is very wrong. Don’t just marry, marry purposefully, marry someone you can grow old with and enjoy each other, marry someone that will support and compliment.
    I won’t support you marrying a man that doesn’t have a source of livelihood because you will drain each other. So if you want to stay with your ex, then you have to wait till he is financial stable. But if you want to follow the overseas guy, then get to know him first, don’t rush or commit yourself into marriage. Do your independent research, don’t depend on your mum or spiritual mother because they won’t live in the marriage with you.
    Ask questions from this overseas guy, like what kind of wife he wants and what his plans are. Don’t tell this guy your own plan first because you will be leading the guy to tell you what you want to hear.
    In all of these let God lead you, be open minded


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