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I’m loosing my mind and l don’t know what to do again, I’m 25yrs old now.

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I’m loosing my mind and l don’t know what to do again, I’m 25yrs old now.

 

Admin pls kindly post and hide my identity.
I’m loosing my mind and l don’t know what to do again, I’m 25yrs old now.
it happened that when l was around 14yrs my dad wanted me to study Law , l got admission into a private university to study Law knowing fully well that Law isn’t accredited in the school yet but the school authority said it will be accredited before we complete our program.
l told my dad then that it’s a big risk oooo , that what if they didn’t accredit the course before we finish but my dad abused me and said if l had performed well in my Jamb that private uni wouldn’t have been an option for him.
l kept quiet and enrolled for the program then when l got to 200L it was obvious that they might not accredit the course anytime soon.

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My dad called me and said he can’t be wasting money again that millions is wasting that what if they didn’t accredit the course till l finish, l told him that was the same thing l told him from the onset but he asked me to keep quiet that l should take Jamb again and enroll in a federal uni which l did, l wrote Jamb and l was given admission in a Federal Uni to study Linguistics not Law.
My dad wasn’t happy with it but he said l should enroll that when l finish studying Linguistics l will go back to study Law.
l said Okay but deep down l was angry because l Knew it can’t be easy plus he wasted 2yrs of my life
l agreed with him because l don’t have a choice , l studied Linguistics and l graduated.
He told me I’m still young that l still have time that l should go back to study Law, l agreed with him.

One of my uncle’s abroad called my dad and spoke with everyone in the family
He asked me about my education and l told him I’m going back to study Law .
My uncle wasn’t cool with the idea and he spoke to my dad that it’s better l travel out of the country, he said that’s the best but my dad wasn’t cool with student visa
My dad said after studying , l will still end up coming back home , l tried to convince him that most people travel through student visa and they find their way when they get there but he didn’t agree with me .
My uncle spoke to him about how he became a citizen through visiting visa but my dad still didn’t agree
l was already angry with the whole thing so l told him okay it’s fine lemme enroll for the Law already
I guess he spoke with his friend who told him l can always find my way to be a citizen when l get there through any type of visa
So my dad told me go for my NYSC already that l should forget about Law
while l was serving l applied for a US visiting Visa but l was denied.

My dad wasn’t happy, l was not happy too but it is what it is life goes on
So my dad traveled to US around that time and when he came back he said marriage visa is the best that it will be easy for me to become a US citizen
He said that’s the only type of Visa that can make him have rest of mind,
l told him student visa is the best if you ask me but he insisted .
l already completed my NYSC. l told my dad what next because l find it hard to think straight whatever l say is irrelevant to him.
He said it’s the marriage visa hmmmmm l said okay.
They already arrange with the guy to come to Nigeria to get married to me
He told me the whole package is 12M because they will pay the guy and pay for his flight to Nigeria and so on
l was like it’s too much, but he said that’s how they do it
ok l agreed.

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The guy came to Nigeria in 2019 , we went to court did the whole thing took pictures , after that we went to South Africa for honeymoon thou my dad followed us, the whole thing was packaged well because my dad is a law
The guy started the filing when he got back to US . he submitted the necessary documents and he said he was sent a mail from the embassy around December 2019 that they’ve seen all the document submitted since 2019 till now we haven’t heard anything from the embassy, my dad wasn’t happy which l understand because I’m also not happy. I’m stock here, l can’t apply to US for any type of Visa for now since l have a pending visa already.

My dad lied to me that’s he’s helping me secure a job somewhere in Abuja because l told him I’m tired of staying at home since 2018
when l noticed the Job isn’t forth coming l told him to allow me go to the neighboring state since l served there and l didn’t pack my things from my apartment, l kept on paying for rent while l was with my parents.
He didn’t agreed at first but my mum spoke to him and he agreed.
l moved out of the house and l got a job through a friend but my dad wasn’t happy, he insisted that l must come home when l told him my salary, he abused me saying l should come home till the job he’s helping me to secure work out. l told him l will come home when he secure the job.
Yesterday my dad called me saying he thought about everything that l should apply for Jamb and study Law , l told him l will call him back since l was at work, l called my mum immediately my mum said never . when l got home

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When l got home my mum called me and said dad already discus it with her but she said no that it’s not the best decision , that I’m 25 now going to 26 , she said she told him I’m a lady and not a man
and she said the reply my dad gave her is that there’s no age one can’t study

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so my dad called me and said l should obtain the Jamb form , l told him no sir that I’m not interested in studying Law again that all l want now is to travel out or do my masters here.
My dad said you want to do masters with that nonsense course you studied , l told him it’s not about the course that l can always do a diploma course and from there l can do my masters in a related course but he insisted saying No
that l.must study Law.
l told him it’s not compulsory l go to US that l can try Canada and he said he doesn’t know anyone in Canada that he can’t allow me go to countries he doesn’t know anyone .
l told him life is beyond looking for a close person in a country before going, since l will be staying with the person for a short period of time that it doesn’t matter, He got angry saying I’m ungrateful that he’s looking for ways to better my life and I’m insisting, he got angry and said l should not call him again till l die if l don’t want him to cause me , l cried because that’s the first time my dad will say that to me . l told my mum what he said and she said l should let him be that going back to study Law isn’t the best option and that most lawyers are even looking for ways to travel out.

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I’m sorry for the long story.
Pls what can l do to make my dad forgive and see reasons with me or should l agree with him , Law is for 5yrs if l will be going through direct entry and l will be 30+ by then
pls what can l do ?
Thanks
Kindly notify me when posted

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4 COMMENTS

  1. Concentrate on yourself and job,don’t study any law rather look for ways to do your masters. Law ko law ni,who law help? He is just stressing you for nothing, most people that read law are not even practicing, they are doing a different thing entirely just to make ends meet. God bless you

  2. Please have a mind of your own
    What do you really want who are you confirm this within yourself
    Your dad has lived his life if u keep following his every saying i dont know how u do it
    Times has changed sister wake up When u become successful in being yourself and doing what you u want to do
    He will come around

  3. Don’t allow even your parents control you that emotional abusive highly demonic and manipulative try to evaluate what you want and know your priorities then be focused and u will be fine

  4. Honestly, your father is a very greedy and self centered man, I can’t believe a father is like this. So you think choosing your own course of study is disrespect to your father right, I’m sorry for you, your father will waste your life for you and later say he is sorry, he has wasted some years for you already, he is a greedy man to the point that he planned an arranged marriage for you , mhrennnnnn some parents are really terrible. PLEASE follow you choice, no parent has the right to choose what you should study in school, pls do your thing abeg. Some parents are not fit to be called parents Honestly. GOD BLESS YOU SISTER

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