HomeAdviceShould I Confess To My Wife And Kids Because I Feel Dirty

Should I Confess To My Wife And Kids Because I Feel Dirty


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Should I Confess To My Wife And Kids Because I Feel Dirty

I met a man here on nairaland that nearly or should I say took advantage of me and made me nearly commit an abomination which I nearly did. I wanted to keep this to my self till he sent me a message this last night again

I would keep this brief and I hope I find closure with this as I have been so sad since Wednesday and I couldn’t sleep

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I had to create a New moniker to post this because this is shameful

I’m 29 and a very handsome man. I have a young family with a beautiful wife that I don’t even think I deserve because she is an Angel and I have 2 beautiful girls that means everything to me.

I lost my Job during the pandemic last year and it has been hard getting another Job and it’s even harder watching my kids starve and my beautiful wife cry at night

I know my responsibility as a man and top most is me providing for my girl’s and their Mom.

My wife have been shouldering the feeding responsibility at home since March because after i paid my girls school fee in February my account became empty

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Even though my wife does everything she has never been rude to me or shown me the normal “Nigerian” women attitude

She has never denied me sex or spoke to me rudely since August of last year. She meets men, richer men that wants a relationship with her but this lovely woman tells me all, she even gives me her phone to chat with them

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In all of this I kept on looking for a job because I feel like I’m failing my girls

On Monday I was in a thread here on nairaland and I made a post that I needed a job so badly and I got an email from here and I replied the email and I and the person started talking and he invited me to his office in the island

I was excited, baby was excited and the girl’s were excited as well and I got to his office the next day which was on Tuesday and I submitted my CV to him and he went through it and was impressed and we spoke even more and he said something to me ‘what can you do to get this job’ and I said anything because I need to start providing for my wife and the girl’s as I was feeling the pressure from home and he said something again. ‘You are very handsome and I would want us to be closer and if you agree to this you would get even more than a job

Then he told me his office would get back to me and he gave me #15k as transportation and while I was heading home he texted me and said if I’m free tomorrow he would like to see me

My mind told me something was off , I knew but I just couldn’t imagine or believe something of that nature could happen to me, I replied his text and told him I would be free and he told me he would get back to me and Wednesday morning he sent me a text that we should meet in one of the biggest hotels in lekki

I asked him why an hotel and he said he has an appointment with a client and he would want me to see the client with him so he accesses my ability In convincing a client to partner with us

Then I got to the hotel by 10am and I called him I was there and he invited me to his room and when I got in it seemed odd

There were 2 glass and a bottle of wine and we started talking and we spoke a lot while we drank and I actually felt comfortable around him and we started talking family and he told me his wife and kids are in America

Then when it got to my turn I told him about Nike and my girls and I got very emotional and started shedding some tears because I’m failing my family even tho it’s not my fault, even though I look for job everywhere and every day both on jobberman and LinkedIn and Twitter and Facebook

Then he told me how much I want the job and I said so badly and he said what can I do to get the job I said anything and he said what can I do to get a job of #150k per month gosh that broke me and I said anything at all and right there he called his personal assistant to draft an employment letter in my name and add a salary of #150k

We continued talking and he told me how much I had left in my account I told him just 3k because I gave wifey the rest of the money he gave to me to prepare something for the kids

Some few minutes later he brought out a bundle of cash and told me it’s mine and the employment letter in his email which he showed me if only he has sex with me


I was stunned and astonished and didn’t no what to do

I needed a job so badly, my kids needed the money so badly, Nikky has carried the family enough and I needed to do something and there was an opportunity

If it was you what would you do?

I have never thought I would be in such a situation in all my life but I asked him if it would be painful and he Said no

I’m so sorry for even considering it

Then he showed me a video of how easy it would be


May God forgive me

I agreed guys

I agreed I’m so sorry babe

I agreed because I have been so broken and empty emotionally and mentally

He told me to pull of my dress and I did and he did as well and I don’t know what he rubbed in my ass , maybe a cream he said for easy penetration

Then he kissed me and I kissed him back and in all of this I was just mute, confused, not knowing what to do

I knew I hated what I was doing but I needed a job for my girl’s and wifey

Then he told me to give him a Mouth Gig and immediately I held his penis in my hands I remembered how Nike would always say no to other men And the Love we shared and I came back to my senses

And I respectfully told him I can’t and he was angry and DISAPPOINTED as I could tell from his look but he told me to leave and I asked him about the job and he told me he would get back to me

I left and immediately went to the church to pray and when I got home babe asked me about it and I said I didn’t get the job and at night she wanted us to make Love but I felt too dirty to do that

yesterday morning she wanted to kiss me I felt too dirty to do that also

My kids noticed I was different and asked what’s wrong and I told them daddy was sick

I’m confused, I don’t know if I should tell her and I don’t know how she would feel or if she would even forgive me

My kid’s are on midterm and I should take them out today but no money, I can’t remember when last we had a family time together in an eatry

I feel so sad right now

I feel so broken right now

God forgive me

Please let’s not take advantage of people in their down moment. I nearly fell for this and would have regretted it forever

God help me

Good morning



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Should I Confess To My Wife And Kids Because I Feel Dirty
A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J


  1. Thank God for your boldness to stop that sort of immorality. Please just forgive yourself and move on,there is nothing to be worried about biko. Don’t think you need to tell your wife about your experience now,wait until you get a job,take them out and tell her your experience, and you guys should just laugh over it. It is one of those things ooo my brother. Calm down, pray and see how God will give you a good job for what God cannot do does not exist. God will provide a good job inugo,sorry for everything.

  2. Hmmmm, Mr poster this is so emotional but am very happy that you God helped you to come back to your senses and you refused him. The truth is sin thrive in secrecy, if you think you don’t want to encounter your wife’s anger and you keep mute she will continue to ask why the change in your behaviour and you will keep lying to her and as this man keeps pressuring you because he will you might want to give inn cos of the money and job involve but once you tell your wife together both of you can fight it and come out victorious. God grant you wisdom to handle this in Jesus name. Amen pls let your wife be in the know/picture it will make your life and decision easy.

  3. Tell your wife just as she do tell you her own. Since you didn’t do it no big deal she will appreciate you abs it will help you to free your mind.

  4. Thanks for sharing. Please share your experience with your wife. That’s one of the ways to ensure that your heart is free and to foreclose ever going back to the man. For your information the man will be expecting you to crawl back to him.


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