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Why Am I So Unlucky In Love And Relationships-Please Advise


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Why Am I So Unlucky In Love And Relationships-Please Advise

Dear Jzhane,

My name is Tanya Kelly (not real name). I have an issue about relationship at hands now which is making me to sad and frustrated but I will like to counsel me on what to do ma.

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Unfortunately I stayed almost 8 years without having any man in my life just turn to God totally because of the situation I am passing through then. But this year I meet a guy that’s really care for me on calls even when we see he’s still doing the same but there’s an issue that’s btw us and this issue makes me feel betrayed and unhappy by him

Since I knew this guy I don’t know the actual place he was staying except his brothers house the I know when I come to the city he was in.

What happen is that I told him that I wanted to relocate which we agreed to come to his city that he was living which he help me also to stay with his brothers and his girlfriend for some time to get a house and work but I don’t feel comfortable there because of some characters the people there are doing in my present.

Then l later get my new place after a month during the time we quarrelling seriously because he always lied to me:

1) He go away with his brothers girlfriend every Sunday both of them take travel to another city for work which I asked him but told me that she’s working at the next city near his ace

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2) This guy did not take me to where he was staying in his next city that he always told me that he is working and live near there only him come to my house

3) He does not one day help me financial immediately he collect his salary he send it home still borrowing money from me but refused to give me back

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4) I always suspect that he was staying with a woman because each time we are in video call he’s not stable and can’t chat with me freely off phone and telling me that the battery is low

I angry with him always never trust him but he will be saying he loves me he can’t do without me monitoring me up and down controlling my phone not giving me breathing space

But the most sad things now is how foolish I let this guy have s8x with me after good 8years of my waiting with marriage and now I am PREGNANT for him which I told him yesterday when he called me

My problem now is that 8years ago I do an abortion for my ex which nearly cause me my life and I have promise God that I will never do any abortion again in my life but with this situation that’s on ground now am so confused.

Why only me is taking care of baby ? I have 2 growing up baby which I am the only one take their responsibility when their father have another wife with 5children waiting for many 20years after I still enter mess again 😭😭😭😭 why God is forsaken me makes me to do another mistakes after more years of waiting

Yes I have growing up children’s bf when I was very young but they are growing up boys now so I wanted to re- marry again because the father of my 2children have remarried 18years ago with his wife and 5children but I stay alone to send my children’s to school till they finish university so I can’t remain single for my whole life at 40plus I need a man to remarry but I think I am not patience enough that’s why I enter this mess again

This guy is just my boyfriend ma. I have decided to send the guy away from my house anytime he came so I can end the relationship. Please ma what can I do ? Now I am one plus now on my pregnancy can I do the abortion and beg God for forgiveness or I leave the pregnancy?



Photo Credit:seasonspsychotherapy


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Why Am I So Unlucky In Love And Relationships-Please Advise
A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J


  1. Huh,keeping a pregnancy for an unserious person is not worth it,having an abortion is also not a good idea. You are still a very young woman who can still remarry if she wants but would have been patient to make the right choice afterall you already have grown up children,and that should also make you happy than any other thing. If you have the resources to take care of the unborn baby please keep the pregnancy and move on,it is well with your soul.

  2. Keep the pregnancy. Discard the unserious man and focus on your children. Most importantly,follow and stick to God. He has the power to reorder your destiny to the right path. God bless you

  3. Please keep the pregnancy, “abortion” or taking the life of an innocent child is not the way. You just need to forget about the guy and focus on yourself and the children and also be closer to God. I pray and know he’ll get you through these trying times


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