My Fiancée Kept Secrets Some Dangerous Secrets From Me-Please Advise
I need your counsel. I have been in a relationship with my girlfriend for two and a half years. I love her to death and will do anything for her. She started dating me when I had nothing. We helped me get a job and by God’s grace, a doing very fine.
I proposed to her early this year and all ever think of is when we eventually get married. Five months ago, she travelled to New York for her best friend’s wedding. Most of her school alumni were in attendance.
When she returned, all was fine. She gisted me about all that happened and showed me pictures of places they visited. Like 3 weeks later after she returned, she was ill and I came to see her.
Her fever was becoming too high, so I took her to the hospital. I was scared cos I hoped it was not covid-19 cos she just returned from US and she really toured many places.
On getting to the hospital, she was admitted cos her fever was just too high. I left her that night and came the very next morning to see her. It was then that she started to cry on seeing me.
I was worried…I feared the worst had happened. All she said was she was very sorry but she refused to say. The doctor cam e and asked if I was her husband, i said…no, her fiancé…he looked at both of u and told my girl to talk to me
I feared it was a terminal disease or something horrible. I kept begging her to tell me but she said when we get home. She was discharged that day.
On getting home, I begged her to tell me. And she said…she was pregnant. I was like
…oh…I thought we were using protection…and then she said …she made a mistake and slept with someone, a former classmate in New York.
I looked at her in disbelief. My girlfriend is the only person I trust with my life in the whole world. I couldn’t recognize what she told me she did.
It was an emotional couple of days for me. I was disappointed and in complete disbelief. But a week later, I called her and told her I forgive her…that she should do a D and C…and we can move on.
That was when my girlfriend….the love of my life told me she has no plans of taking out the pregnancy. That she wants me to move on. In shock…I asked her her why…she says she and her former classmate spoke and he asked her to keep the baby.
That he’s been married for 3 years without a child. And he feels God gave him a blessing through her. So what about me? She said she’s sorry but I have to move on.
Believe it or not…till today… I don’t know why my girlfriend did this or refused to choose us. So I have been so heart broken until last week. My girl reached out to me…and said she has removed the pregnancy and she wants me to consider forgiving her and taking her back.
I swear to God… I wanted to jump for joy but then…I have questions….I asked her to tell me what happened and she said…its too painful to talk about…that she believed a lie and she just wants to move on.
Well…I told her that for us to move on…she has to come completely clean…or nothing…she says she does not know i will still want her if I know the real truth of what really happened.
And then, I told her that no matter what happened, I will forgive her. After crying and begging. She made me swear to forgive her after she tells me…and I swore that I will forgive her no matter what…in my heart…I was wondering what could be worse than getting pregnant for another man?
When she then told me that she slept with her best friend’s husband whom she attended their wedding…who she was maid of honor for…I wish didn’t promise to forgive her.
All the stories she told me about how it happened did not make any sense to me…bottom line is…she slept with her best friend’s husband few days before their wedding…she cheated on her fiancé and got pregnant in the process.
Now…for me…this is not the same girl 8 fell on love with.. she is displaying a character O never knew she had…she is a cheat ,a liar and a backstabbing woman. She went on to explain how that she had a secret crush on the guy and that she knew the guy liked her but chose her friend but while in New York, the guy came to her hotel room…talking regrets that he wish he expressed himself to her…it was supposed to be a crush but she made a mistake and took it further.
To God who made me…I feel like we are done…how do we ever build trust again? I love her but I don’t trust her…she said it was an error on her side…bla bla bla…if I was the one who committed such a huge error…Will she consider forgiving me? She said yes but its easier said than done…right???
I am broken…sad and I don’t know what to do…should I move on? Can we ever make it if we try? Has anyone been in similar situation before? Were you able to completely forgive and move on? Its hard to move on I must admit …this lady was there for me in so many ways…I still cant get over how she let this happen…what should I do?
Please advise me
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