My Family Is Depending On Me To Break The Marital Curse-Pls Advise
I want to remain anonymous. I am struggling whether to write this or not but I am very tired and I don’t know what else to do. So, my name is Lydia. I am 38 years old, actually next week is my birthday and I turn 38 years old. I have am from a family of four: 3 girls and one boy of which I am the last.
The reason for writing this is because all my sisters and I are still single, only my brother is married. My sisters are 44 and 41 while my brother is 39 years old. I and my sisters have been very unlucky in relationships. To be honest, its not like men do not approach us but the ones that have come always have issues.
To be honest, let me speak for myself, I am not materialistic neither am I too picky …I just don’t know what is going on…its like someone placed a curse on us which we have looked for solution everywhere and prayed and fasted for many years. In fact, I fast every day for the last 4 years. I really do not know what is wrong. Who did we offend?
It is my desire to get married. I am beautiful, I have a steady job and I am a born again Christian. What else am I missing? I have been in 3 relationships since 2006 when I graduated from school yet, none of them worked out. I was a good girlfriend, their families loved me, I cooked and looked after the men yet, they still managed to dump me…one sha, I had to end it cos he just kept cheating no matter what I did to forgive him.
Now, I am in a relationship which started last year December. We were introduced by a mutual friend. When I met him, he had just come out of a four year relationship with a woman who had a child for him. They could not get married according to him because his family and the girl never agrees. That the girl is hot tempered and always fighting with his family, so he decided to end it even though they have a child together.
As a responsible father, he sends regular upkeep money to the baby mama which I am aware of. Now, I just found out that the baby mama is four months pregnant for him. It was actually the baby mama who sent me a message to inform me to leave her man so they can work out their issues. She said if not for me, they would have been married…that she is pregnant for him. My boyfriend did not deny the pregnancy. He said it was a mistake and that he is willing to prove that its me he wants and not her.
A family meeting was called, both family sent representatives. At the meeting, my man told everyone, that to prove that he wants me, he wants us to get married by court next week or month…anytime I want. Everyone is saying I should forgive and do not allow an outsider come and scatter what we are building together.
I have really thought long and hard about this matter. My parents are happy that there is a man coming to marry me…but how do I marry a man who slept with his ex even while we are together? What if he still has feelings for her and continues to sneak behind my back to see her? His actions though show how remorseful he is but what if he is deceiving me?
My elder sister said I should go ahead and marry him so that we can at least break whatever curse has been preventing us from getting married. You see, its not easy being almost 40 and over 40 and not married or have a serious guy in relationship. The rumors and gossip about me and my sisters not being married has made my parents stop going to social events or travel home for any occasion to avoid the stares and gossips.
Everyone in my family is looking up to me to get married since there is a man coming for me…my two sisters have not been with a man for almost 5 years now…my only issues is this baby mama issue…from experience, it appears no man can be faithful to one woman…maybe I would have been married now if I was not looking for a man who does not make mistakes.
Apart from this one matter, this man is a good man, cares and supports me. He is very hardworking too, my parents like him alot. I am sorry if I appear undecided…my mind is very confused…one mind wants to break up but another wants to marry…I have been praying to God for guidance.
I do not want to loose another opportunity…my man has really begged me and I feel he is actually remorseful. He thinks the baby mama may have jazzed him cos he said he slept with her only once…I do not know how true that is but I know his family does not like his baby mama at all…its me they prefer…his siblings tell me that all the time.
Yesterday, I woke up having a bad dream….the dream was that another woman got pregnant for my man again. Is this a sign or is this my fear projecting unto me? Or is this some spiritual attack on me, to miss another marriage opportunity? Please what should I do?
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