Home Relationships Our Friendship Situation Is Not Working Any Longer-Pls Advise

Our Friendship Situation Is Not Working Any Longer-Pls Advise

Our Friendship Situation Is Not Working Any Longer-Pls Advise

Good morning ma,

Kindly post my story hide my ID. I am a lady age 26 working for a certain logistics company l need advise on how to handle this situation l have found myself in. I got this job through a friend she is more than a friend to me more like a sister, we were at the same college when we finished our course she found a job years later there was a vacancy in her place of work that’s how she helped got a job before l could settle down.

l stay with her for 2months eating her food and staying in her house. When l started getting paid we started sharing the house rentals and groceries. At first l thought it was ok but my friend would suggest whatever we make we share, it all started from overtime the rules of the company requires that the manager should not get overtime which she is a manager and a clerk, but she suggest whatever overtime l make when l work we share.

At first l thought it was ok but as time goes by l wasn’t comfortable with this arrangement l didn’t speak out cause l thought l would look bad knowing fully well that it’s because of her that l got the job. The sharing of the monies of the overtime continued until l was transferred, when the transfer came l was transferred to another city and she remained at the same station.

l found her when l was employed, after months of been away, more business opportunities started opening up and my former station was doing well. My friend was having difficulties to cope with the situation as she was enrolled in school, doing distance learning. She had to go on leave that’s how l was requested to go and work from my former station to sit in for her as she goes on leave.

l was given lodge allowances and transport l knew my friend was there so l went to stay with her but like always l should give her half the amount l make, l was a bit reluctant but to avoid talking we shared the money, this continued for 3months l was getting l tires of this cause even when she is on leave l would report to her and whatever l make we share.

l think l became her puppet she is good l won’t lie and she has helped me alot but is this how will continue living l give her half the amount l make,l think she is now taking advantage of me because she has helped me alot but indirectly using me.

Right now am at the same station cause she has gone on leave but still wants me to give her half the amount of the allowances, l refused to give her that amount cause l also want to invest in something, yes l had agreed that we will share the amount in half but am tired of this.

We are both Christians and l don’t want the issue of money to separate us. After l told her that am not giving half the amount she got upset and said l should stick to the agreement or else she will return the money in my account. l don’t know what to do anymore how do people help is this how it should when someone helps you then you should always do like they want if you refuse then you become ungrateful or look selfish.

Help me out on what to do cause am confused . Am l bad, am l selfish? Is this how people who help act? is she taking advantage of me ? please house advise me am just tired of been her puppet l always do whatever she wants if l refuse then it will bring arguments.

l want to earn to stand on my own and say no to things l don’t want but l don’t want to hurt anyone. Advise are welcome.

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  1. You are not bad or selfish my dear,the only mistake you did was to agree to the initial plan. You have to talk things out with her,I’m sure she earns more since she is the manager and also clerk. Remember it was an agreement you accepted in the first place and you still stay in her house pending on when you will go back to your location. You said she is a nice person and also a christian,settle it amicably, tell her how much you can afford, also mind the things you use in the house. God bless you

  2. Definitely she is taking advantage of you and you don’t have much cards to play as it is her house, her rules and you have to follow it or move out & get your own place. You only have two options. (A) Try to discuss this with her and tell her you won’t continue with the arrangement, if she is a good friend as you described her, maybe she will agree, and if not, you are left with option (B) which is your only choice left. (B) move out, get your own place and live & spend your money and life the way you want to spend them.



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