HomeAdviceWhy Am I Having Nightmares About My Upcoming Wedding?

Why Am I Having Nightmares About My Upcoming Wedding?

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Why Am I Having Nightmares About My Upcoming Wedding?

Four years ago, I was involved with a man. He told me he was getting a divorce, that he was unhappy in his marriage, that him and his wife are trying to kill each other. He made me feel like I was his peace of mind …that I brought him peace. He spent most of his time with me, got me an apartment. I was so much in love that I got careless and got pregnant.

Pregnancy changed everything. His wife who they have 2 children together began to beg him to come back to him. Their family members who were even in support of their brother getting a divorce suddenly came after me and called me all kinds of names: homewrecker, etc.

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The wife even tried her best to convince him to make me get an abortion but the pregnancy was already four months plus. We ended the affair but I had my baby boy who looks exactly like his father. I was really hurt but I blamed myself for trusting a man who was not fully divorced before getting involved with him.

Anyways, those days were very dark for me but my son gave me the strength to move on. With the small money I had, I started my catering business and worked really hard to make a business for myself. Indeed, it was tough but I became very popular in a short time through instagram, I displayed my food and did delivery services.

In one year, I was having big clients to cater for. That was how I met Kelvin at a high level wedding I catered for. To be honest, I still get alot of attention from men but once bitten twice shy right? I choose very carefully…and I am sure I want to marry right the next time.

Kelvin got my card cos as usual, my food was so good and my services are out of this world. Kelvin wanted me to cater for his elder sister’s birthday party. Kelvin flew in from London to attend to his friend’s wedding and his elder sister’s birthday. I gladly took up the offer and planned a state of the art surprise party for Kelvin’s elder sister.

That is how we started to talk. He went back to London but stayed in touch. We would call each other everyday…London looked like next door. We spoke and face timed everyday. Our friendship grew so fast. He started coming to Naija every two months just to see me.

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My son, now three years loved him so much. I met his sister in Nigeria and his other siblings in London spoke to me almost every week. His parents, lovely people, who live in Canada spoke to me and loved me for real. Since this year, everyone has been asking when are we getting married. Kelvin proposed last June. Our introduction was in August this year and that was when all hell let loose.

At our introduction, Kelvin’s elder sister came with her husband and Kelvin. Their parents and siblings couldn’t make it. It was just a few days to the introduction that Kelvin’s elder sister told their Aunty who lives in PH about me. That was when we discovered, that Kelvin is my baby daddy’s cousin. Kelvin’s aunty in PH is my baby daddy’s mother.

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That family is evil. They quickly rallied around and started raising alarm. That Kelvin must not go ahead with the introduction cos I was a hoe wrecker to their son’s marriage. Well, thank God I told Kelvin all that happened between me and my ex and Kelvin refused to listen to all the pressure to back down with our marriage plans.

It was a big matter. Even my family did not want to go through but Kelvin and I were determined. Since August, we have been trying to calm both sides of the family to let bygones be bygones cos me and my ex are done and no need to bring up the past.

Kelvin’s family finally agreed. Mine too agreed. Only my ex’s family refused. We eventually had the introduction in October. Before that introduction, I was having really and dreams. I was afraid but I got my aunty, her pastor and my mom to fast and pray. On their way back from the introductions, Kelvin’s car had an accident and Kelvin’s driver died in the accident. His elder sister fractured one of her legs. Kelvin got a few bruises but he is fine.

The accident triggered alot of reaction from Kelvin’s family. They are now believing what my ex family said: that I am bad luck. The fact that Kelvin’s elder sister is even still in the hospital since is making everyone feel like our marriage is going to be one terrible mistake.

kelvin does not believe in superstition but since that day, the bad dreams have not stopped. We are still praying and going ahead with the wedding which is in December , we pray Kelvin’s elder sister will be discharged before then but the tension in their family is bothering me. The bad dreams too.

Two weeks ago, I sat Kelvin down and told him that I am really worried cos I do not feel we should go ahead with the wedding. Kelvin said its only God that can decide if we will marry or not. That if its not God’s  will, then thins will happen naturally. That has not stopped the fear I have or the fact that I still have night mares. My Aunty’ s pastor said someone in my ex’s family is trying to scatter our marriage but that we will prevail through prayers.

Two days ago, I had another bad dream and this time, someone was trying to take my son away from me, I was crying and begging them to leave my son, that I will leave Kelvin alone for them. I woke up crying. Now, is this the sign to end this now or what? I am willing to marry Kelvin even if the whole world is against it as long as Kelvin is in agreement with me.

My only issue now is: what if this could harm my child…what if I loose my son in the process? Or why did the dream show me that someone was trying to take my son and I was begging  them not to, that I would leave Kelvin for them.

I don’t know if I am overly paranoid but I am now scared. What is the meaning of my latest dream, is this a threat to my son’s life? Or will the prayers enough to continue to protect us? What should I do please?

Anonymous

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Jzhane
A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J

3 COMMENTS

  1. Are you even sure your Aunty’s Pastor is s genuine pastor, too many fake pastors are out there. The choice is yours to make If you want to continue with the wedding or stop. I wish you the best sister. Peace

  2. I think you need to pray yourself and find the peace you need to go ahead with the wedding. Nobody really knows n understand what you are going through. Thank God Kelvin is a Christian too. You both are directly involved, so you need to both step up your faith level and send that evil back to whoever and wherever. Keep declaring over your son, life and marriage what you want to see. Allow this situation draw you so close to God so that anyone that wants to try you, would know that you are not someone to be joked with. Please don’t give in to the devil

  3. Ayayaya!!! This is the time to tie your wrapper very tightly and take all yourself to God in prayer. This is a battle between you and the evil doers. You need to fast and pray more. Also continue to involve some of your own family members and relative pastors.

    That dream means another loss will come soon. It could be your son or anybody else, but something will be lost and it will make you cry in the future if you don’t fight this battle successfully with your faith and prayer.

    Things that you need to recheck again to make sure you win this battle successfully includes:

    (A) Are you sure the guy you want to marry now is God’s will for you? Hope it is not you or the guy that is putting up the conviction inside your mind that you must marry him no matter what? Cos if you are not sure he is God’s will for you, then that’s where you should first trace your step back to and know what God is saying about the guy, to be sure you will overcome the problem.

    (B) Also, are you (or have you become) a truly righteous person? If you are still living a life of sin or a lukewarm (or irregular) life of being spiritual today and carnal tomorrow, then you need to do better. Yes, if your pastors and family members are also praying for you, your prayer might get answered as the prayer of a righteous person is powerful and produces great result (James 5:16). But you can’t be so sure those people are actually righteous and truly Godly, so it is better for you to become fully righteous yourself and fight this battle with your own faith and prayer as long as you have a right standing with God.

    So basically, seek to be righteous, that is, fully give your life to Jesus Christ and let him seal you with the Holy Spirit. With the help of the Spirit, you will know if Kelvin is right for you to marry or not, and then the Spirit will also let you know whether you should continue to press on to marry him or not in all these circumstances. The more you walk in the Light and knowledge of truth, the more you see things according to the Light.

    Thus, in all these things, never lose your faith, long-suffering (patience) and lastly never relax on your prayers. I pray the Lord fights your battle for you successfully without no loss of lives again.

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