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True Story: My Marriage Is Struggling With Temptations-Pls Advice

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True Story: My Marriage Is Struggling With Temptations-Pls Advice

Hi Lively Stones,

I need honest and objective advice from your readers. I hope I will not be judged for the things I am about to reveal about myself here. This is difficult for me to open up but I need help with making a decision, I think its better to try than not to try. It is a crazy story but here is it…

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It was the year 2015 I met Chike at a friend’s wedding. He could not take his eyes off me. He pressured me to go out with him for three weeks before I agreed. We got married exactly nine months later. That was a huge mistake. I was 23 years old. Chike was 27. We were both young and stupid.

What we thought was love was not enough to sustain the marriage. Chike was cheating and having baby mamas everywhere. The beating he also gave me made matters worse. He beat me until I lost my pregnancy. The marriage lasted only seventeen months. I was bruised and traumatized.

My elder sister invited me to spend some time with her family in the UK. I took that opportunity to do my masters, to get my mind off my pain and depression. I met Lisa, she was also doing her masters. We became very good friends and I truly opened up tp her. We became lovers actually.

ALSO READ:Men Would Never Be Cheats Without Women-How My Wife Pushed Me

In my life, I have never had feelings for another girl before. It was a taboo as far as I am concerned. But Lisa opened my eyes to a kind of love that I never knew existed. We had a relationship for three years. She helped me really find my self esteem again. But I kept our s3xual relationship a secret because, my family would never agree to it. Lisa eventually got tired of me keeping us a secret, she broke up with me.

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I came back home two years ago to start afresh. And truly hoping that I could forget about that time of my life as a lesbian. I met Yomi last year and we have been dating. Yomi is a great guy, I was able to open up to him about my abusive past marriage and my experience with another woman. Yomi didn’t judge me. He said maybe my trauma with my ex led me to think I was lesbian. We got married a year later. Life has been pretty normal. I work with an Advertising company and my job is pretty exciting.

We had a company retreat in December and something happened. We had a little too much to drink during the last night of the retreat, everyone was having fun. A female colleague of mine of mine had a truth or dare game to kiss a girl. She picked me and when she did, my entire body became very horny.

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I ended up knocking on her door that night, I asked her if I could kiss her back. She was like sure. We ended up making love that night. I couldn’t be my self after that. I struggled with s3xual feelings for my colleague everyday. I had to tell my husband what was going on. He was very chill about the whole thing. He said maybe I am bi-sexual and he is ok with that.

My husband now told me that he has always had a s3xual fantasy of having a threesome or watching two females make love. He then suggested I invite my colleague over so he can watch us make love. I was shocked because I never expected him to say such. But it sounded very exciting. I asked my colleague and she agreed. I was very nervous but we met up and while we were doing our stuff, my husband joined us and before I could control anything, we were having a threesome.

My husband was beyond thrilled. I didn’t like it one bit. The idea of sharing my man did not sit well with me. I was filed with jealousy all through. I told my husband we would not do that again. He agreed but I later found out that my husband and my colleague met after our threesome and had s3x. I was so upset. I felt betrayed by my husband and colleague.

My husband and I had a long conversation few days later. He apologized profusely and promised not to contact my colleague again. We decided to stop bringing anyone into our s3x life. I still have s3xual feelings for that girl but the colleague stopped talking to me at work. I understand, I do not expect her to be friends with me after what happened.

My husband called me few days ago and said my colleague called him and told him that we used her and dumped her. That she would expose us to the blogs like Linda Ikeji and Instablog, that we are swingers.

I thought husband was joking so I confronted my colleague. To my shock, she denied it. She said, she never said anything to my husband, that its my husband that is asking her for s3x and she says she cannot continue if I am not down for it anymore.

When I asked my husband, he denied everything my colleague said. When I asked him if he is willing to confront my colleague in front of me, he accused me of not trusting him. I am now confused. I do not know who is lying. Is my husband lying so he can make me continue the threesome relationship ? Or is this girl lying?

ALSO READ:How I Let The Devil Into My Home-Will My Marriage Survive This?

I decided to share my story on this relationship blog incase, this girl actually goes to social media. I really love my husband, I just pray I did not use my own hands to introduce him to s3xual temptation from other women. It is clear we both have some wild s3xual imaginations, the problem is, I cannot share.

And if you are wondering why I have decided to stay in my marriage after the suspicion that my husband may be lying? Well, I found out that I am pregnant. I cannot think of anything else for now. I just want to be focused on my baby for now even though I am still battling with trust issues with my husband.

I still wonder who is telling a lie? My husband or my colleague? By the way, I am quitting my job at the end of the month, I cannot be in the same space with this girl. So, there you have it, my story. What do your readers think? My husband or my colleague, who is lying?

Is my husband still interested in  my colleague? Do you think they could be hooking up behind my back? What can I do to stop them if they are both still hooking up?

Anonymous

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Jzhane
Jzhane
A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J

3 COMMENTS

  1. Quitting your job is fine, concentrate on your beautiful baby for now. Don’t allow anything bother you,your husband is lieing ,yes he is,he obviously enjoyed the threesome,that’s why.

    Please forget about them and think of something meaningful to do with your time,biko. Give your husband peace,don’t stress or monitor him,afterall you brought this upon yourself.
    Just leave him to God,it is well with you.

  2. i will try not to judge you here. But youre majoring in the minor. if your husband is a cheat, he ll surely find a way around it with your colleague or whoever..
    Focus on yourself and the child youre carrying . stop chasing to catch a thief, both of you are. Youre into wild lives, save yourself first before you can help another. Your colleague and your Husband may be playing on you right now. she wont do her threat, shes just out to put you in the begging position.

    But i sincerely wish to appeal to you to determine to lead a more straight life, considering youre bringing a child into the world now. Youre a Nurturer as a woman, youre going to be a role Model to that young one. you cant continue living wild. Ask God to help you daily and if you go back, dont give up on yourself, keep asking for help .
    Peace.

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