I just want to say thank you for all your counsel and to everyone that has spoken on my issue. I know they are all good counsel and well meaning. And I have been thinking about everything everyone has said.
I just need your prayers more. Please because my heart is torn. My heart is torn because even with all the counsel,I still don’t know what to do. So, I told my Aunt and my mother what really happened between me and Gbenro (not real name,but call my neighbor that).
They were shocked so a family meeting was called. They also called Gbenro and Gbenro did not deny anything. He said he was sorry and he knows he was wrong but that he was afraid that I would not agree to marry him because he was older than me or a divorcee.
Gbenro is 39 years old. I do not see him as very old,before the incident,we get along very fine. We gist and I really like him.I just never imagined that he would drug me to forcefully make love to me. He said he has been asking God for forgiveness,that he has never done anything like that before. That it was loneliness that made him think of such an evil thing,that is why he wants to marry me.
My family asked me if I love him and I said yes but I feel hurt that he had to rape me. And I also told them my fear of him doing it again if we get married. Gbenro has promised to swear by anything my family wants,that he will never do it again. My family is now begging me to consider him.
My mother thinks no one might even marry me if they find out that I was raped. And in all these,I did not even think what will happen to me,what if I get pregnant because I never thought of this before. I did not go to the hospital or anything. Will I abort if I get pregnant?
My Auntie in particular is of the opinion that good always comes out of a challenge. She says that this happened for a reason. At least,I will get married to someone who care for me and will provide for me for the remaining part of my education. She said things are tough because she is the one running her home,the lock down has affected her husband’s business badly.
So now,my family is asking Gbenro to swear not to ever hurt me again and he is willing to. I have tried to pray to God to guide me. Left for me,I would rather walk away but circumstances are beyond my control. I also think maybe its God’s will for things to work out this way…what if Gbenro is truly my destiny?
Life is not perfect …do you still feel I should walk away after this? I know if I refuse,my Auntie may not be happy because she has really tried for me. She says I have nothing to fear,that God has a plan for me in all these.
Gbenro is really showing remorse. His elder sister too has been coming to beg me. That his brother is not a rapist . That his divorce made him really sad and he actually has not been able to love anyone again. That she feels I am the one that will help him if I agree to marry him.
Like I said, I could walk away as the most advise I have see here have said …I just want to update you all and still know what you think…please advise me again…its not easy…my heart is really confused…marry Gbenro and hope everything will go fine (everyone is sure will) or walk away and miss my destiny or face my family that is struggling financially.
Can any good thing come out of this situation? What if Gbenro really made a mistake…Thank you all so much. I really cherish your advise on the journey so far. God bless you.
Anonymous Lively Stones Facebook Fan