HomeAdviceNaomi's Story: My Client Called Off Her Wedding Because Of Addiction

Naomi’s Story: My Client Called Off Her Wedding Because Of Addiction

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Naomi’s Story: My Client Called Off Her Wedding Because Of Addiction

Hi Lively Stones,

Happy New Year. Anyone miss me yet? Well, I have been doing some work outside of Lively Stones but I have been following up on some of the happenings on the blog. Some of these happenings have been nothing short of gbas gbos …as in…did you read the man who’s brother’s wife has been plotting to seduce him? And in the end….found out his wife was knacking his late brother? Omo….that story shook me.

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Not only shaking me, it made me want to share one of my client’s stories. I think alot of people have been s3xualized too much during their growing up stage. The rate at which s3x is destroying relationships is worse than any pandemic disease. Some people were s3xually abused …some were just introduced to s3x too early by perverts that as adults, they can’t do with s3x and even go to the length of doing crazy things just for s3x.

My Client is a 33 year old young lady. She is very fine, as in very beautiful. When she walked into my office for her appointment, even me, I was like, what a beauty. Yes, many people package beauty but they are suffering serious emotional stuff within. This lady, let’s call her Sherry sat down and told me that she is in a relationship, that the guy is everything she desires but she cannot marry him.

So what happened: Sherry got exposed to S3x quite early from boarding school. She got involved such that she and her friends would even sneak out of boarding house to got to parties and have s3x with older men for money. Eventually, that was the life she knew. She equated s3x with enjoyment and love. So, her love language is plenty s3x.  Sherry would dump any boyfriend that could not go several rounds of s3x with her.

And that is how she married Harry (not real name) at age 23 in her 200 level of university. It was young and stupid love. S3x everyday even when it was clear both of them were immature. I mean, Sherry cheated on her young husband who was 25 himself with several guys. This is after he even agreed for her to have some crazy s3x like threesome cos he thought he was making her happy.

Harry could not take it anymore…by the time they were graduating from school, Sherry was known by everyone in the school to be the biggest big girl on campus. I mean, polititians, rich men came and dropped her off  in big rolls Royce, BMWs, Mercedes, etc. It was clear her husband could not please her. It was after they were posted to service that Harry decided to file for divorce. He could no longer cope.

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By age 26, Sherry was divorced. Sherry decided to stay single. Living her life they way she liked it. Without committing to any man. She liked her freedom of sleeping with any man without being tired down at her own will. Sherry has done well for herself. She has grown her career and she is a CFO in her company. The first and youngest female CFO in her company. Everyone admired her so much but they also gossiped about her philandering lifestyle. Sherry did not care.

ALSO READ: Naomi’s Dairy: How I Slept With My Therapist

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And then last year, Sherry met Tom. Tom for some reason was not like any other guy she has been with. Tom was different. He did not want s3x from her. And when Sherry pressured him for s3x….he spoke to her and told her that for the first time, that he was in love with her mind and not her body. Sherry dumped him immediately but Tom did not give up. He saw in her what no one else saw…he saw that she was beautiful and smart but really lacked serious self awareness.

As much as she did not want Tim, they were in many circles together….so they kept bumping into each other. They also became good platonic friends. Best friends. Everyone thought they were a perfect fit. That was when Sherry decided to try and change her lifestyle. Harry too was excited to see Sherry making a change. And then, on valentine’s day, he asked her to be his fiancée.

Sherry was elated….she finally thought she had her life back on track…she loved Harry with all her life. He was a good man. Sherry suppressed her s3xual desires with masturbation and toys which Harry was aware but he never knew it was an addict…Harry was an open minded guy and saw no harm in masturbation. Well, Sherry would have won the fight but just this Christmas, she went for an event….and ran into one of her former ‘friends with benefits’.

As much as she wanted to avoid any stories that touched…this guy was one of her best s3x she ever had….she wanted him badly and ended up with him in a hotel….she not only had the guy….the guy invited one of his buddies and they had a threesome. Sherry had a wild night. Sherry got broken again. After the whole situation ended….Sherry could not face herself or Harry. She broke up with him when she even realized that one of the guys works in the same company as Harry.

Harry does not want to accept the breakup….he still wants to marry her….he suspects that she cheated but he has no idea that she cheated with two men and one of them is a coworker. Sherry is devastated….she told me that she just realized that she is a s3x addict and if she marries Harry…she would break his heart. Sherry is now suicidal and going through therapy with me. Its going to be a long journey.

If you were in Sherry’s shoes…what will you do? If you were the therapist….what advice or what help can you offer Sherry? Maybe someone else is in this situation, how can we help?

Love,

Naomi.

If you want to share your story, send me an email: missnaomionome@gmail.com.

 

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4 COMMENTS

  1. My advice is Sherry needs spiritual help, she needs to give her life to Christ, she needs fellowship to grow in Christ and therapy.

    First deliverance from the spirit behind this insatiable desire for s.x that makes her loose her guard something she opened herself to through one of her encounters. This deliverance has to be from the right source not a ‘Prayer House’ that will take one demonic spirit away and add ten.

    For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war after the flesh, there is something more ‘waring’ in her trying to destroy the beautiful destiny God has for her.

    • To add, if the lady has already given her life to Christ but still finds herself in this situation then the below scripture can help.

      It was written to the *Brethren i.e. saved people to present their bodies holy to God by renewing their mind to align with their saved experience. This is where daily intake of the word in increasing measure … walking in the spirit ( walk in the spirit and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh) and therapy will help

      ‘I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service and be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God’. Rom 12: 1,2

  2. If I was in Sherry’s shoes,I would give my life to Christ, submit to God totally,desist from friends with benefits,leave my exes alone and surrender my life to God.

    If I was the therapist,I would suggest she avoids masturbation,get herself busy,get her a good friend that will always be around her,get her books to read, inspirational books,listen to inspirational fm ,they also discuss issues pertaining to her on radio. She needs to start living in the present and leave her past.

    It is well with her

  3. I was smiling while reading this. I have met guys that tell me they struggle with pornogragy and masturbation, guess what I tell them, I tell them to fast, and it has helped many guys I tell.

    Tell her to fast for a month, I can assure you she will drop this habit, fasting kills cravings of sex, food and other pleasures, I wish you will tell her.

    I wish people know how powerful fasting is, it weakens sinful cravings in the body, also tell her she won’t die while fasting, she should break by 6pm for 31 days, she should sincerely ask GOD for forgiveness using praying with Psalms 51.

    I hope you tell her, this works because it has helped many people I told in the past.

    Fasting kills sexual cravings.

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