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True Life Story: How I Only Wanted To Have Fun But I Fell In Love With A Complicated Man


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True Life Story: How I Only Wanted To Have Fun But I Fell In Love With A Complicated Man

Merry Christmas Lively Stones,

Please I need your help and advice. I am very happy in my relationship which started four months ago but my boyfriend just revealed something to me and I am quite confused. Sometime last year, I broke up from my 2 years relationship. I was very hurt and I did not want to date anymore. My friends encouraged me to just have fun instead, so I got on a dating site and my this guy.

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We chatted for one week and we decided to hangout cos we were really attracted to each other, great personality, etc. So we met up, and I could not believe how handsome and S.e.xy this guy was. I was blown away….swept off my feet soon as I set eyes on him. But I told I was not looking for a serious relationship, just looking for fun and it was really fun. I mean this guy went all out on our first hangout, lodged us in a five star hotel and we really had a great time.

From then on, we met in different exotic places…it became impossible not to see each other everyday…I mean , the chemistry was something else. The S** was out of this world…never met a man that knew how to please a woman like him…He knew I was single, he told me he is in a situationship, in a relationship but things are no longer working out, they are no longer in love but they agreed to stay together but they can both see other people as long as they are discreet about it.

Well, I did not really understand it but I did not care too much cos I was not looking for a permanent thing at the time. I was caught up in the excitement. But as time went on, we both started catching feelings. It was not in our plans, so we decided to give ourselves a break cos it was beginning to get serious. But we could barely stay one week apart from each other. I wanted him badly and so did he too. He told me he was in love with me.

We had to address the elephant in the room….I told him I was in love with him too but I need to know about his other relationship….he told me not to bother but I kept insisting and that was when he revealed he was married. I almost fell off the bed when he told me he was married. If there is one thing I do not do, I do not date or sleep with married men. I began to get up and react so bad but he calmed me down to say that his wife is a lesbian.

Les what? Well, long story short is, he met and married his wife 3 years ago. Everything was cool until he caught his wife with her so called best friend in bed having lesbian S**….he was so mad that he wanted a divorce but she attempted suicide….she begged him not to leave her. Told him that she is biS.e.xual and loves having S** with both male and female…She told him he can have a side chic if he likes.

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ALSO READ: My Girlfriend Is Very Attractive But I Suspect That She Is BiS.e.xual

According to him, he really wanted to leave her but when she attempted suicide, they also found out she was pregnant, So he decided to stay because of their baby. However, since he found out what she did, he stopped loving her. To revenge against his wife….he started going on dating sites for hook ups. The wife is aware and she does not say anything to him and he does not speak to her except its about their baby.

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According to the wife, she wants them to be together so their baby can grow up with two parents but they can do whatever each person liked with lovers. This kind of arrangement is so very strange to me cos I realized now, I am dating a married man with a kid, who says he is not in love with his wife but in love with me. I found that very hard to understand so I told him to give me sometime to think about it.

That is what I need help for. I love this man…he loves me….we both cant be without each other for long. He even screenshot his chat with the wife where he told her he is in love with someone but since he told me about their situation, that I don’t believe him. The wife responded that he if he really loves me, then he should invite me to see her so that she can explain things to me.

So, the wife wants to explain their relationship with me. Now, this drama is getting too complicated, I told him I do not ever want to meet the wife…so I spent one week crying cos I am confused and do not know what to do. I already got heartbroken in my last relationship….I did not plan to go through heart break a second time. But I cannot get this man out of my mind.

Eventually I agreed to speak to the wife on phone cos I cannot bear to meet her. And she called me and told me to feel relaxed, that me being with her husband is actually doing her a favor cos she is in love with her partner but she cannot break her marriage cos she wants to avoid anyone knowing about her secrets. So the marriage is like a cover for her. That she grew up in a broken home and she does not want her children to experience the same pain she grew up in….so despite her love for men and women, she wants a marriage as a cover.

I asked the wife if she still loves him, she said no but she will not lie to me, she still desires S** with him. She even laughed and said we can all have a threesome if I like. I could see this woman is wild and weird. So, after speaking with her, I told her I will think about the matter more…I went to check this woman’s IG….she is like a goddess…tall and so beautiful….I felt so jealous of her. To even think that she might still want to f*ck my man made me feel so jealous…..

My man suggested we can get married if that will put my mind at ease but I don’t think people will understand…they might think I am a home wrecker since his wife is still there…second wives are seen as home wreckers. Plus, how can I be a second wife to such a woman that oozes such S.e.xiness? Both of them look like the perfect couple on social media.

My man asked me to come spend Christmas day with him at a shortlet he got. I got there and received the most romantic surprise….I was weak in my knees…I just wanted to be in his arms and I forgot about every problems I had….I forgot about his wife and their silly arrangements.. We just made love all morning. I know I am lost in love with this man and I have lost my ability to be sensible or use my head.

Please advice me….please don’t say leave him…I have tried…my heart keeps betraying me…. we are both in love…he even showed me a ring he wants to propose with…he said if I am ready….he is ready…we have been together for 9 months now…is it better to remain a side chic or become a second wife?


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A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J


  1. Marriage is a lifetime commitment, it is more than all this sweet feelings and romance. It comes with a lot of maturity and dedication. All you have made known is that you are S.e.xually attracted bro this man, what about other aspects? You need to understand what you want to step into.
    It was all fun, fun until you both wanted to make it official. So start discussing things that matter.
    How will you deal with the situationship and co sharing of husband? Do you mind being tagged second wife?
    If you are not sure, do not rush into marriage. Marriage is for the brave and strong. You can’t be crying everyday when you are hurt. You must be able to deal with your emotional more maturedly.

  2. The issue I have with you is that you have refused to stick to the initial agreement of no falling in love and catching feelings for anyone.

    You just wanted to have fun, hangout,hook up and enjoy,and now you’re doing the opposite.

    Marry him,you heard me, marry him because you already said we shouldn’t ask you to leave him,so be his second wife,don’t be a side chick oooo, please marry him and be happy.

    Good luck to you my darling, don’t listen to anyone who will tell you otherwise afterall his wife is in the know of all these, using marriage to cover her immortality and waywardness.

  3. Reading this story almost gave me headache , like what is marriage turning into ? a man married a lesbian and the woman loves her lesbian partner but she is biS.e.xual , what kind of demonic manipulation is this , the enemy has made many confused , and u said u want help , u sincerely need help if I were u I would have nothing to do with the man and his lesbian wife , yes i have met people who told me they were gay straightup and this guys do not desire S.e.xual relation with ladies no matter how i try to convince them what I did I gave them space we might be friends but I would never stay too close to them to even take the same drink they take , which one is biS.e.xual, aunty run for ur life , if not u might be a lesbian too , or what business has the wife got to do with u . She want to nack u too ? What today marriage is turning into I don’t even understand


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