True Life Story: How My Wife’s Secret Past Life Is Now Affecting Me
Dear Lively Stones,
I am a happily married man, at least for the last four years. Never had any reason to doubt my wife’s sincerity. I met my wife six years ago. She is a hard working woman, she is into buying and selling of food items in wholesale. She has a shop in a big market in one of Lagos’s big markets.
As someone who is also hardworking, I always provided for my wife from when we were dating till date. I am a traditional man, I believe a man should provide for his family. Never for once have I ever asked my wife for financial help, even when business was not good for sometime. I do not even know her ATM pin or her account balance. We have two children and so far, we are doing very good.
Last year, I lost some businesses investments, this affected me in a way that I have never expected. I explained everything to my wife and told her we will have to manage. My wife accepted and I felt bad but I could not provide as much as I could for a while. My wife also did not complain of anything. So, you can imagine my surprise when my wife’s elder brother invited us for his house warming in Lekki. We went there to celebrate with him. Me, my wife and kids.
So, as we were there, I casually told her brother, to show me the way now…like…cut soap foe me, so me too I can be a landlord like him. The guy was like, how do you mean, that I am the one to cut soap for him. We joked but later, I cornered him and asked him about the house cos I was hoping to start investing in our property next year. My wife’s brother looked at me and said….but your wife is the one that bought the property for me now….
My wife…like how? My wife’s brother told me that the big house he was celebrating was bought for him by my wife but my wife told him not to tell anyone that is not family member…but he sees me as family member…he was shocked I knew nothing of it. He also told me my wife has two houses in Lagos, one in her village and she built a house for their parents too in Kwara, where my wife is from.
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By the time this my wife’s brother was done….I was thinking I was in dream land. It was as he was talking, the guy realized I knew nothing about my wife’s properties, he begged me not to tell my wife he was the one that told me. Going home that day….I was speechless….wife kept asking me what was wrong. When we got home, I could not hold it in anymore….I asked her to confirm or deny that she has properties in Lagos and Kwara. My wife did not deny it at all.
Infact, she said…I do…I have alot of money….even before I met you…alot of these money, I got when I was dating high profile politicians. But I retired from being a high class olosho, invested in business and I am doing well for myself. That night, my wife and I talked till day break….I was in shock…I realized I knew nothing about my wife’s past….I did not ask …she said…I asked her why she did not tell me…she said she is not proud of her past…besides….she felt I might judge her knowing what she used to be.
I then asked her….how much she has in her account….she said almost 150M. Since that day….I have not recovered from the shock of it all. I have serious trust issues with her. I am married to a millionaire….for four years…and I knew not. She never behaved like she was rich….she acted very humble but knowing how loaded she is….I am finding it difficult to come to terms with it. She apologized to me but also said…I never asked and she never bothered to tell me.
In my account, all I have is about 550k. That is making me really inferior to my wife. I know she never has been rude to me, but I can’t accept that my wife is way richer than me and that she got her wealth from doing side chick runs for years. This thoughts make me angry and upset with my wife every time even though she has not done anything to me. The only thing I fear is…how she can keep all these secrets for so long…only God knows what else she is hiding from me.
Now, I am beginning to suspect her every move…she said she started olosho at age 18 till she was 25 years old. We got married when she was 29 years….I am so scared…what if she is still seeing any of those men…before, I never questioned any man she was doing business with….now, I am scrutinizing her business calls especially to some Alhajis…I feel terrible but this is how scared I am….I am always angry…asking her…who is she talking to….and she will say that is why she never told me cos I would see her differently.
I must admit….I see my wife differently now….Am I safe in this marriage? How do I continue in this marriage pretending that my wife’s wealth is not making me feel so insecure? And if she hid this from me….doesn’t that mean she does not trust me? Doesn’t that mean….that she is not the woman I thought I was married to and so…we are not compatible? How is my wife a millionaire and I am not? See finish will set in in future….how do provide for a woman who has everything…..yet she has not even contributed one kobo in this marriage?
I am feeling really worried about this…I need your advice…if you were in my shoes…as her husband…what will you do please?
Anonymous
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Your wife is still seeing some Alhajis if not politicians and she has more than that amount in her bank account. You mean she hid all these from you,huh! Obinrin
If you love her,please bear with her because of the kids,thank God she is cool, respectful and loyal.
Just endure and make your marriage work, don’t feel insecure, don’t feel bad about this revelation biko,don’t make her regret revealing this to you.
Thanks,but be careful sha oooo,me no trust that your wife ooo at all.
Try to understand her own point of view.you never asked from onset and she’s not proud of her past. What she’s scared would happen is eventually happening now. I believe if she’s still seeing those politicians you would have seen traces no matter what. It’s because you just found out that’s the reason your mind is playing tricks on you and assumption keeps coming in. Please let it slide. Try to trust her and let things go back as it use to. There’s no big deal she’s richer than you. Your wife wants to stay married do not destroy what you both have because of her past. Try to forget it. Remember it’s not that you asked about her past and she lied about it. She was honest about it. She could have as well told you she dated a billionaire and not olosho You still won’t have known. Please accept her and forget it all. Please let peace reign love her back.you said she has never been rude to you
Hello Sir,
Your wife never loved you. She settled for you because she saw you as the nice boring guy. I have dated lots of women and I can tell you for a FACT that women spend money on men they love and the S.e.x is amazing. Your wife does not love you and she never did. Please find a woman that loves you and is crazy about you. Don’t listen to liars telling you to forgive because they are siding with the woman here. Think about it for a minute, if she loves you and your family, why will you not enjoy the money? She does not love you and she is still sleeping with politicians hoping that one day, they will marry her. When that day comes, she will frame up one excuse to leave the marriage. THIS IS THE TRUTH, PLEASE OPEN YOUR EYES. All the women that ever loved me always spend on me. Seeing me happy makes their day. If that is not the case with your wife, please find another woman because life is too short.
Oga ur brain empty ooo so you can give dis kind of advice to someone chaiii ur brain is very very empty
You are even proud to say women who loved you in d past spend on you dat. Makes you less of a man but a gigolo
Your very funny. The fact that my comment is making you react like this shows that I struck a nerve and I am right. Men like me can do not have the SIMP mindset. I was earning 5 times her salary and she still spends on me because if two people earn money, I see no reason why only my own money must be spent. I don’t need parasites in my life. Good luck being a real man
Chaii.. this isn’t the kind of advice we should be seeing here, it is people like you that will lead people astray and let them make bad decision and at the end you will say what is your own, if you know you can’t give good advise abeg shout up.
When we tell fellow men about female nature, these men call us women haters and accuse us of not wanting our wives to succeed because we are afraid of so called successful women, lol. Men like you make me laugh, when I read the part you said, you took care of her while dating, I just knew you are a simp, a man that puts women on a pedestal.
Men like you have the “women can do no evil” mindset about women. I hope you bounce back, read books on masculinity and female nature like; the manipulated man by Esther Vilar, get it from pdfdrive.com.
I wish you well brother.