True Life Story: I Lied To My Boyfriend The First Time- Should I Confess?
Hi Lively Stones,
Please don’t judge me. I did something wrong, but I want to make things right. I just don’t want to loose my man in the process. About 4 months ago, I met someone through my friend. It was a fun hangout and we hooked up after all. Ade (not real name) is into exports, a well to do guy and he was also looking for some fun.
After our first meeting, he invited me over to his house for a night over. During my stay, I noticed he kept alot of hard currency around. He also gave me 500 dollars. I do not know what moved me, but I took some dollars from his wardrobe. I picked up pick pocket habits from a young age, you would never catch me but I have not done so in many years until now.
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The next day, Ade called me and asked if I took money from his house when I came over. I pretended to be angry and shouted at him. Told him off. Telling him that I can return the 500 dollars he gave me if he thinks I am that cheap to steal from him. Ade apologized and the conversation ended that way.
Like two weeks later, he started chatting me again, asking for us to hang out. He also kept apologizing for suspecting me. That he had to sack his house boy cos he is the only one that cleans his room. I felt horrible that someone else was sacked for my fault.
Truly, because of that, I did not want to have anything to do with Ade anymore. But the more I played hard to get, the harder he tried. On valentine’s day, he surprised me with so many gifts. My friends called me a fool for not wanting to date him. They even threatened to take him if I do not want him.
So since Valentine, we have been dating and its looking like its getting very serious. Ade spends alot on me. He spoils me every time. He already is talking about meeting my family. He told me he had fallen in love with me on the first of this month. Now, I think I love him as well but my conscience is pricking me so bad for stealing from him the first time I spent the night in his apartment.
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Please I need your help. Before this relationship goes any further: do you think I should continue to keep quiet about the incident or should I tell him? Maybe he can forgive me if I am honest but what if he dumps me after or even arrests me? What I stole that night was almost 300 dollars and some pounds.
One time, he talked about the house boy he sacked for stealing He said he regrets sacking the boy but since he could not find anyone else to blame, he could not continue to let the boy work because he values loyalty most importantly in life.
Ade is stinking rich. With a good heart. Maybe he does not even miss the money so why bother tell him right? I don’t know why I am still nervous and sometimes, it makes me shaky when am around him. I do not like lies in relationship if I am serious with the person. I can even tolerate cheating but not lying. Or maybe I should wait a little more…to see where the relationship is truly heading before I say anything?
Please help me decide : to either keep quiet or tell Ade and beg his forgiveness? I may be a thief but I have a good heart. Few days ago, I asked him if I did something wrong and I confess to him, that will he forgive me…he said yes…as long as I did not intentionally mean to hurt him. He thinks maybe I cheated on him…do you think its a sign that he can forgive me on this because, I did not hurt him anyway from stealing his dollars right?
I need to make things right, I do not want him to think I am a crazy thief, or maybe I am with him for his money…please advice me how to go about it without loosing my man.
Anonymous
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Beautiful woman I love you because you have conscience,you don’t have a bad mind and God will continue to bless and keep your relationship with Ade.
Now,free yourself like a bird,all you need is to love Ade just like the way he loves you and promise yourself and God that you will never ever steal or do pick pocket again. If you have decided in your heart never to do it again,then you are forgiven.
But wait ooo,did i hear you say you preferred cheating to lying. Nne you can’t be serious,both are dangerous,a cheat will also lie because when they are caught,they will deny,so don’t wish for things you cannot handle biko.
Ade loves you right,he is planning on coming to see your family,then treat him as a king and always make him happy.
God bless your relationship and don’t steal again my love
Someone lost his job about the matter and everyone is saying don’t confess, how would u feel if u were purnished for something u didn’t do ? Pls confess and have a clean conscience.Pls get this, not all relationship will lead to marriage so if after the confession he his no longer interested so be it ,at least u have a good conscience.pls repent and allow God help with this addiction becos he is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all we can think or ask.
Sin thrives in secrecy therefore confession is the first step to freedom.
When confessing pls show that u are indeed sorry and remorseful for the act and u are doing everything to ensure that u are free from the addiction.
Thanks
You should confess and let him know your predicament. He deserves to know. Besides what you confess has no power over you anymore. Confess and let him know that you love him from the depths of your heart. And then avoid him. (Give him space). Whether or not he will forgive and help you and remain in the relationship is his prerogative also, it will be his own test of will. Give him space afterwards, and if he loves you truly, he will come looking for you. Bottom line, you need to take care of your situation. Find help!!!
You need to come clean to Ade, tell him the truth and help the house boy get his job. But what are you doing about this habit? You need to be able to show Ade that you are working on that habit. You can’t continue to steal and make it feel like it is normal. What if you do it in a place where they will mob you? Get to work my dear, you moving on in this relationship depends entirely on your willingness to change.
Every sin affects us or someone else.
The act of picking pockets is still in you and you can’t keep ignoring the fact that you haven’t dealt with it.
For you to steal after many years shows you haven’t overcome that urge.
Come clean to Ade. Request he brings the houseboy back if he is still available. If not available, request for an apology to be done on your behalf and extend a hand. You don’t know what pains he went through due to your action and lies.
Someone said if you release a bird and it returns to you then, it is yours to keep.
If Ade learns of your action, which you should inform you with a sense of repentance, showing remorse and readiness to turn a new leaf. He will forgive you.
If he refuses to continue the relationship, then you have conquered lies and stealing and ensure you don’t return to the act anymore.
Sometimes,we do certain things as needful to win in life on the long run.
All the best.