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True Life Story: I Want To Settle Down With Wife Material Or Marriage Desire

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True Life Story: I Want To Settle Down With Wife Material Or Marriage Desire

Hi Lively Stones,

It is not my intention to be in this situation but it so happened that is how I have found myself. That is the reason I want to make the right choice now and chose what is best for me. So, there are two ladies that I am in a relationship with. They both do not know about each other. I love both of them very well. I first met Gina (not real name) two years ago. She is my type of woman.

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I love slim and very sexy women. Gina is beauty and brains. She has a good job and good character. If I did not meet Bekky, I would have married her by now without thinking. But I met Bekky last year. On my way to Abuja. Bekky is a big curvy girl, not my type of girl. But she was very friendly throughout the flight to Abuja. We exchanged number and she promised to host me if I come visit her.

Mennn…Bekky is a wife material all round. She is from Cross River, she made some ekpan kukwo and pounded yam when I came to visit her. A fantastic cook and we f*cked till day break when I came to see her. I was hooked on Bekky. So, that is how, she became my Abuja girlfriend while Gina is my Lagos girlfriend. I am not on social media, only Gina is on facebook but I told both ladies that I do not like to show off my relationship on social media so both ladies can never know about each other.

ALSO READ: Love Triangle: Is This B*tch Trying To Steal My Man With A Trap?

They both just know that I travel every 2 weeks between Lagos and Abuja. The day Bekky wanted to visit me in Lagos, I rented a shortlet apartment, I told her my place was being renovated. I love both ladies I wont lie. I have introduced both to my brother and mother. My family loves Gina because of her looks but what Gina does not have is: Bekky can cook and f*ck better.

However, my folks think Bekky is not fine enough for me. They are saying because she is fat, when she starts giving birth, she will be shapeless. I know I like slim women but Bekky excites me. There is no form of intimacy that she is not down for. And she is always in touch with my folks. Calling and checking on them. My people are already telling me to break up with Bekky cos she is acting like my fiancé already.

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Its not like my family do not like her, she is not just fine like facially compared to Gina. And her size too. But Gina, is a city career girl. She is not as humble as Bekky. Not as freaky too. I can go on and on to describe the differences between both women but I see myself leaning more towards Bekky.

My worry is that, I have always said I must marry a fine woman. But I see myself turning towards a woman that is not that fine physically but internally. The only question I have is: I hope I do not regret it later in life. I have cheated because I am single, I do not want to cheat as a married man. So, who do I chose between both ladies?

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ALSO READ: The Man I Love Is Afraid Of Wasting My Time – What Does That Mean?

If I choose Gina, I fear I cannot stop thinking about Bekky. If I chose Bekky, I fear I do not hate her body later in life. I know she excites me now, but her physic has never been my type. She even seen my exs from past and she sees that they are slim girls. Bekky oh Bekky…I am crazy for her…but confused if what I want is in Gina…but what I love more now is Bekky…they beauty is not what will sustain a marriage but it can make you happy…so also, ….s3x is not what keeps a marriage but its important.

Please advise me.

Anonymous

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Jzhane
Jzhane
A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J

7 COMMENTS

  1. Nna you have the answers in your palm already,you be real Oliver twist ooooo.

    Becky is your wife,I rest my case. When time comes you will understand that there is more to marriage than beauty or shape.

    You better marry Becky,she can cook,she is humble,she is good in the Oza room,wetin again you dey find? Becky can always hit the gym if you want,you better follow who know road ooooo.

    Peace

  2. You put yourself in this situation by double dating.
    You seems to be more connected bro Belly than Gina, for you to be traveling every 2 weeks to meet a woman means there is something worth it. Bekky is seeing you has a husband already.
    Why don’t you talk to me and get her opinion. Marriage is a compromise, focus on the key elements.
    However if you can’t overlook her size, please let her go, don’t key her as side chic. You should also let Gina go, you obviously don’t like her

  3. You are dating two women and fornicating. I will advise you to stop this nonsense you are doing.

    How will you feel if you find out a lady you are dating has you as an option. I will call out your double standard bro.

    Stop fornicating man. Stop the whole nonsense. I’m less concerned whether you choose Gina or Bekky.

    Be the change in the world.

    ✌️

  4. Talk to bekky about your concerns of her weight and observe how she would react… I am not of the school of thought that wouldnot be so self centered to make my woman adjust her life into what I think I want…but you have complicated issues now

    Tell bekky to hit the gym, support her financially and mentally..after a month check to see if there was a significant changes in the weight loss…There you would know if she takes your concerns seriously or not…Don’t push or stress her,only support an see (Don’t expect her to be as tiny as Gina, people are created differently..don’t be more Oliver twist than you are right now)..if she can loose weight now, then she can loose weight after child birth

    Gina is a cool lady and I like her already, because she is career focused and not likely to be dependent on her husband,this I can’t say for bukky…Also talk to Gina about your concerns of her not being wiffy enough to cook delicacies for you…

    Gina is less likely to wanna please you or wanting to devote time to learn to cook for you, but brother if she indeed gets better at cooking then she loves you alot even though you are cheating.

    Sex with bekky is better, and you experienced it after Gina… Forget you don’t intend to cheat after marriage but I tell you brother,the body wants what he wants…. Getting married to Gina might not stop u from going to have explosive sex with bekky

    Plus you cheated for bekky and might still cheat on her with someone else you meet on your way…You complicated things, try to be better when you get married eventually

    Follow this and your decision would be clearer

  5. i hope you will not like it, if a man do the same act or way to your sister, well i rest my case period, men are very very and very wicked

  6. Hello Poster,

    You seem not to have fully understood what marriage is all about. Marriage is a commitment with someone that you have seen a future with. Someone who will compliment you. Someone who will be your friend even when you are not feeling the love. Someone who will let you down sometimes and you will also let that person down but during difficult times, you will remember why you first chose them and remain committed to that journey.

    Someone who will hold you down when you are at your worst. Someone who will pray with you and pray for you. A true life partner. Someone who you can laugh with no matter what.

    Marriage is beyond physical looks. Looks are great but it does not guarantee a happy marriage. Character…kindness…beauty of the mind and soul.

    I have seen most fine boys I know marry ladies who one one thought they would marry…some of these ladies are chubby…some not facially attractive but these so called fine boys chose them because they wanted a woman who’s character assures them of peace and happiness. They still seem happy even today.

    So brother, which of the above ladies has more of the qualities that are above? Make sure you too have those qualities…and then make your choice.

    By the way…stop sleeping with both women….sex has a way of clouding your judgment. So, stop the sex for like a while….see who your soul still yearns for….and then make your choice and end the relationship with the one you did not choose.

    Best Wishes,

    Jzhane

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