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True Life Story: Money Or Love-Help My Friend Make A Difficult Decision


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True Life Story: Money Or Love-Help My Friend Make A Difficult Decision

Hi Lively Stones,

Please share my friend’s story. My friend came over to my house on Sunday cos he ran away from his house where there is trouble in his marriage. I have advised him on what to do but this is his story: I am hoping to get some advise please. My name is Bob (not real name). I am 34 years old, a young entrepreneur. My business deals with contracts from government and rich politicians. As with business like mine, sometimes, there is alot of liquidity, sometimes, things maybe a little scares. But so far, I can say I am doing well for myself.

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That is how I met Ehi (not real name). Ehi’s mother is a woman leader in one of the political parties. I met her and she introduced me to one of the Governor’s S.A who helped me secure a contract that I had been pursuing for months. I settled Ehi’s mother from the contract as usual. Later, this woman introduced me to her daughter, Ehi. Ehi is a very beautiful slay queen. You can see that her mother’s connection in politics is how she hustles too.

Ehi was all over me, she was of course tripped by the money around me, she also helped me get some more connections in politics. I don’t recall ever telling her we were dating, she just assumed she was my girlfriend cos I was even single at the time. After a year of hooking up, she started pressuring me for marriage. Well, I liked her enough, not like I was smitten in love like that…she was a good cook and a good f*ck…who marries for love…and the money was there…so we got married the second year. We have been married for three years now.

What I never bargained was that Ehi’s mother would be controlling Ehi in the marriage. Ehi and her mother are so money conscious. No matter how much I gave them which include cars, luxury gifts, etc, there were never satisfied. Ehi’s mother was always introducing Ehi to big men who were always flirting with her for money. Ehi was hardly at home as a married woman. She made up excuses of attending meetings or travelling on behalf on her mother who is a big woman party leader.

The marriage was like a marriage of convenience. Ehi only remembered she was married when she was broke or needed money from me. In a month, I can count how many times Ehi was around for us to have S**. Yes, when she is around, we have S**….she cooks but before three days, she is gone again. I tried to explain to her that she needs to slow down and take care of her home but she said, she is a hustler and I know she is a hustler before I married her. Well, she is right, I did not marry her for her to become a full time house wife so I allowed her live her hustle.

The only problem was I was exposed to alot of attractive ladies too …when they sense my wife is not around, they throw themselves at me and I tried to keep them at bay but in my mind, I cannot swear that Ehi was not sleeping with other men, so I had my own game and kept myself getting laid. Last year, I completed my twin duplex and moved into my first big house. The house is so big that we always had friends and family over. So, Obehi, Ehi’s younger sister that just finished NYSC also moved into our house.

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Throughout the election campaigning, I hardly saw my wide Ehi. She was going everywhere with her mother doing campaign. Ehi completely abandoned her wifely duties. It was her sister that was cooking and taking care of the house which I did not mind. She is family after all. The period was a very busy period for us. So, after the elections were over, I was expecting wifey to return home but she did not return. After the gubernatorial elections, Ehi sent me a message that I should forget about us, that our marriage was a mistake.

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I guessed that Ehi has met a bigger fish on the campaign train and maybe she now carried away with the mugu sponsoring her parole. I called and called Ehi….she refused to pick up. I called the mother, the mother said she would talk to Ehi. All through March, I kept calling my wife until she blocked me. By this time, the mother was like, if the daughter says she is done with the marriage, then I should forget and move on.

Rumor had it that Ehi was dating a house of rep that won the elections. I nor blame her. She has always had her money on money. I then sent a message to Ehi through her mother that she should please file for divorce so we can both move on. I decided to live my life now as a single guy. One day, Obehi (Ehi’s junior sister living with us) came to me, and told me to stop bringing different girls into the house cos even though her sister abandoned the marriage, that its not good for me to be bringing girls home for good time.

I agreed with her but I told her that I am a man and I have needs…I do not want a girlfriend now. I am not ready to settle down now….so I better enjoy myself the way I like. She was like, Uncle, you are a nice guy… that she wants me to find a good woman to settle down with. I told her ok…I will think about it. The next day, Obehi cooked me some nice Isi Ewu and peppered snails. She knows its my favorite…with some chilled beer. She said she will take care of me until I find a good woman to marry.

Me, I though she meant, she will be cooking for me to eat well until I decided to marry but ol boy….Obehi came to my room….dressed in a S.e.xy lingerie….she took off the lingerie before I could say stop it…her b00bs and her cuchy in my full glare….she was like, I have always loved you….since my sister met you but she married you and I tried to forget but since she has left now…that God has given her a second chance.

I don’t think I can begin to say the things Obehi said to convince me to sleep with her….Obehi started doing something to my system. She is young and energic…I enjoyed f*cking her….she matched my desire…and she was always ready for me….I never loved Ehi…I liked her but I have fallen in love with her younger sister Obehi. Obehi is a S.e.xy woman who knows how to take care of a man. I think I married the wrong sister.

Last week, Obehi missed her period and she told me….she was very excited….she wants to have a baby for me…I love her as well and want to have a baby with her but I am not ready for marriage….plus…I have not even divorced the sister formally. I told her to abort it…lets wait a little bit….at least, get to know each other….finalize the divorce with her sister, so I can be free. Obehi was not happy. In anger, she called her sister to come and get her things from my house and serve me divorce papers so she can clear the way for her to marry me.

Ehi called her mother. Both of them called me and started abusing me of taking advantage of Obehi. Ehi quickly travelled down on Saturday to the house….saying she is no longer divorcing…she wants Obehi out of the house and the pregnancy terminated. I told Ehi that I am no longer getting married….Ehi then threatened to take away all my contract connections and business deals of I don’t send Obehi away.

I know Ehi….she can destroy my business connections and make sure I don’t have access to business in this government. Especially now that the party won the elections. I am confused. I begged Obehi to abort and wait until coast is clear before we make plans for the future. Obehi refused o. Infact, Obehi refused to move out of the master bedroom when ehi came in on Saturday. Both sisters are fighting over me. I had to leave my house on Sunday to my friend’s place to cool my head before they kill themselves over me.

Truth is, I love Obehi…she is young, sweet and innocent. Obehi has shown me more love that her sister…Ehi does not love me…she loves my money….but I think she is filled with jealousy that I moved on to her younger sister but you see this life….its survival of the fittest. I need Ehi and her connections for my business. And her mother is on Ehi’s side. How do I convince Obehi to sort this pregnancy matter? Obehi wont even allow her sister inside our bedroom….I heard they fought yesterday…..I am really frustrated….what do I do?

I am still in my friend’s place, afraid to go back to my own house cos of two sisters. Please advise me…what do I do? Should I choose love (Obehi) and loose my business connections (Ehi)…..or forcefully send Obehi away….let her deal with her pregnancy alone….I love her but I did not force her to get pregnant…even though I would have loved to have a child cos my mother has been on my matter to have a grandchild for her….

I over confuse…abeg make una help me with better advise….wetin I go do with these babes…two sisters…..one is after love (I was told Obehi took after their dad who is a gentle man, the man left their mother after she got into polictics and started chasing men and money)…..Ehi took after her mother….she too like money….love and money….which one will pay me better? Please help me look all these things wella….help me decide.

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A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J


  1. Don’t marry any of them,let them go please.

    God will always help you with your contracts with or without Ehi. Divorce Ehi,she is not ready to settle down,ask Obehi to keep or terminate it,it depends on your arrangement,she might agree to terminate or may want to keep it,she might not want to keep the pregnancy knowing that you are not gonna marry her and she might not want to be a baby mama to her sister’s ex husband.

    It is well with you

  2. Explain well to the sister, let her pack out,and find a different place for her to stay, pending the time Ehi will give the divorce papers

  3. Hello,

    Marriage is a sacred union. You played along so Ehi is your wife. Since you are still married to her and she has resolved not to divorce, ask her if she is willing to make your marriage work? STOP sleeping with other people and take care of each others needs. If she says yes, arrange to attend marriage counselling on your road to healing

    ‘Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery’. Heb 13:4

    Both of you should discuss and not allow 3rd parties control your marriage, ‘a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one’. Gen 2:24. Stay united.

    As for Ehi’s Sisters, she should not be forced to abort, that is killing. Let her have her child but you both can get a nice place for her and send her an allowance monthly, stop sleeping with her you are still married. Speak gently to her mum as a mother to both of them to intervene and get both Sisters to stop fighting.

    If Ehi is not willing to make the marriage work but wants to tie you down on paper, give it some time and pray then speak with your lawyers.

    By now, you should have built some relationships in business that would work for you, plan now to set up other things so that if those business relationships are taken away from you , you can still flourish.

    Remember AIDS is real, protection can break and there are agents of the devil in sweet human form willing to destroy a man’s destiny through s.x, both of you should stay faithful and understand the purpose of marriage.

    Take care


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