True Life Story: My Fiancé & His Family Are Hiding A Secret From Me
Hi Lively Stones,
Please advice me. I am 25 years old, I have been engaged for one year now but I have an issue. The issue is, I found out my boyfriend is keeping a big secret from me. Before my engagement, I dated my boyfriend for three years. Jacob my boyfriend is five years older than me, we were going to get married this year when he turned 30 in August is acting strange. By strange, I mean, for someone who said we are getting married in August which is just about three months from now, he has not shown any serious commitment.
Well, I don’t blame him much because he lost his job in March but he has gotten another one in May, though the salary is not as much as the former job. When I asked him when we will start marriage introductions and preparing for wedding, he said he is not sure if it can happen this year because he is not financially ready. But sometimes, he will say, lets trust God and see how things will go.
Dating someone for four years is a long time…I know we are both young and maybe we don’t have all the money we need but I don’t need much to get married. I told him, lets do introduction and court wedding. Because we are staying together, I feel he is not seeing the urgency for marriage after all, I am already in his house. This thing, I have thought about it long and I feel like moving out of his house but he says if I move out, then the relationship is over.
More from Lively Stones
- True Life Story: My Husband Wants To Sell All We Have To Japa- Pls Advise
- True Life Story: My Wife’s Ambition To ‘Japa’ Is Destroying Our Marriage
My boyfriend has a jealous streak…he does not want me to stay anywhere apart from his house or my parents house. My parents are not in Lagos, they are in Jos. I only have few friends here in Lagos and staying alone is not an option for Jacob. And I cannot go back to my parents cos of my job here…I am a nurse. I am also afraid of getting pregnant even though I have been on contraceptive. My parents are catholic, they will not support any abortion, I was not raised that way.
Then, to make matters worse, Jacob’s half sister came to stay with us for a few weeks. This girl was very nice to me but one day, she told me that she likes me too much, that I am too pretty and from what she is seeing, she does not think Jacob is going to marry me. I asked her why…she said because Jacob is planning to travel abroad for his masters. That was where all his money savings are going into, as he is saving to travel. That even the family is contributing for him to japa. That they feel it would be better for the family, for him to japa first before getting married.
Jacob’s sister begged me not to say anything cos its a family secret. You know, people don’t talk about their abroad travel plans because of superstition. That Jacob has said he will tell me when everything is set. So, I told her to help me stylishly ask Jacob what his plans is for me. She said she cant ask him cos he will suspect her. So she asked another family member, that one said, Jacob said, marrying me is if it is God’s will cos right now, his focus is how to japa. What does that mean?
Never miss a story — subscribe to Lively Stones Relationship Blog PUSH NOTIFICATION for daily Post to stay up-to-date on the best of what LIVELY STONES has to offer, from juicy celebrity relationship news, romantic articles to compelling true life stories.
I am shocked, my own boyfriend did not tell me anything. And because this his half sister told me not to say anything, I am wondering how then will I confront him with this information. Should I wait until he tells me himself? Or should I confront him? And do you think he truly is not planning to marry me before he travels? What does he mean by saying marrying me is if it is God’s will? I have so many questions to ask but I cant because if I do, that means I will betray the person who told me in confidence. But should I continue to sit and wait until Jacob is ready to break the news to me?
Is this news really true? Is Jacob planning to travel and leave me here? Or is he taking me along? Is this marriage thing still going to happen? I am so scared of breaking up cos Jacob has been my life for the past four years…is it all going to be for nothing? 4 whole years? Do you really think Jacob will abandon me to travel? How do I handle this matter please?
Do you have a story to share? We want to hear all about it. Email us at firstname.lastname@example.org or Whatsapp +2348029870309