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True Life Story: My Husband Is Living A Double Life In The Name Of Hustling


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True Life Story: My Husband Is Living A Double Life In The Name Of Hustling

Dear Lively Stones,

Please keep my identity private. So three years ago, things were quite difficult for me and my husband financially. I was  a full time house wife and he was a business man. It got so bad, we could not pay school fees and house rent. My husband pleaded with me, that we should relocate back to the village. As an understanding wife, I agreed. We lived in the village together in my in-laws house for a year, farming and doing petty trading until my husband told me that his friend who’s family relocated to US asked him to come manage his hotel business in Abuja because his friend will soon join his family abroad.

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I was very happy. So, my husband went to Abuja and started managing the hotel. Sometimes, he would visit us once in a month in the village, send money and buy things for us. After a year, I started expecting him to ask us to come join him in Abuja but he never mentioned it. I took it upon myself to ask him and he said hotel business is very busy and shady business, that he does not want his family around that kind of environment.

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I complained to my mother inlaw, she talked to him and told him that his wife must be by his side, so that there will not be unnecessary temptations. He then said ok, that by the end of last year, we would come join him, that he wants to even buy a house so that we will be comfortable. And true to his words, by November last year, we moved to Abuja, to join him in his new house. Our story was like that of grass to grace but I never knew that this sudden success was not ordinary.

After I joined my husband in Abuja, I started noticing that he stays more in the hotel than at home. He always says he’s busy managing the hotel. I started suspecting maybe he is moving with girls. Everyday, I pray and cover my husband. Last week that was valentine, I never expected anything from my husband cos we have never celebrated valentine before. To my surprise, he told me he booked a room for us at the hotel, so he wanted me to come and stay with him. I was happy.

That day, my husband showed me the hotel room and told me he would join me later. I was served food and I had my shower, I then began to wait for my husband. Around 9pm, I called him and he was not picking his call. I called reception and I was told he was in the office downstairs. So, I decided to go to his office to see him, especially because I have never seen his office before.

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As I got to the office, it was locked from inside so I knocked…very lightly….no one responded but as I turned to leave, I started hearing noises coming from inside the office. It sounded like grunts. I realized there was someone inside and the noise was like someone was having s3x or moaning deeply. I became anxious, thinking my husband was sleeping with someone inside his office. My heart started beating fast.

I stood by the door, not knowing what to do and suddenly, I got an insane idea, I knocked again and this time, I said, room service…I don’t know why I said that but after a few minutes, the door opened and my husband opened the door with his nothing on but only his boxers. Soon as he opened, I pushed my way inside with all my strength…I ran inside to see who was with my husband and behold, I saw who it was…it was a man…he was lying down…stark naked with his thing out…the guy jumped up and he was shouting…what is this…who is this…he was frantic…scared that I had discovered him like that.

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My husband ran behind me, grabbed me and demanded in very angry voice that I leave immediately or he will send me back to the village. But I was already leaving cos I saw an abomination sight… I refuse to accept that my husband was with another man…naked and they were having s3x. I went back to the room upstairs, I packed my things and got a cab to take me home. All thoughts crossed my mind…this was a lie….no way my husband is gay….he makes love to me very well and our s3x life is solid…how can he be gay?

That night, my husband did not come back home. The next morning, he came back and when he saw me, he just said,…why did you come to my office? I was angry and asked him…why are you with a naked man in your office? He said I am a woman and I have no right to ask him what he does with his life or in his office. I told him I will tell his family that he is gay and that I would leave him for it.

That was when hubby said, he is not gay but he is doing it for fun. That he is just curios and doing it for the money. That many rich men in this city are into this sort of thing and they pay millions for it. That he does it to make money that he has used to change our lifestyle. He said his salary is just N150k, that he is not really the hotel manager, that the manager is hardly around, that he is the hotel supervisor but he makes over N5M servicing rich men who want this service. He said he found out that is how his friend was able to build the hotel and also able to relocate himself and his family abroad.

Now, I don’t know what to do but I told my husband what he is doing is a sin and I don’t want anything to do with that…he said if I want to leave him, he is fine but I would be stupid to leave him now that he is so rich and has money. That its just a business lifestyle, that I should be happy about the sacrifices he is making. I told him we have enough money now, that he can stop but he says, his goal is to make so much money that he can relocate us abroad before he can stop.

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Can you believe that? I have been so shocked since last week. My husband looked me in the eye and is calling having gay s3x as just business. What will I say to my children? I have decided to return back to the village because since last week, I have barely spoken to my husband…I don’t know how to look him in the face anymore…I feel like…I don’t know him anymore….I feel disgusted looking at him.

Please advice me…what do I do….I have been fasting and praying for God to deliver my husband from the sin of this Sodom and Gomorrah but it appears this one is more than prayers…what can I do…I feel so confused. Is my husband truly into this for the money or did I marry a man who is living a double life? Please advise me.



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A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J


  1. My dear poster, kindly leave that man and hustle ur life. After all, you were managing whilst in the village.

    May God forgive that man. Indeed ” the love for money is the root of all evil”

  2. This type of immorality is covenanted and require spiritual help. Hubby is bisexual or had bisexual tendencies. He most likely won’t stop easily due to pleasures he derives and the money rewards. He got married to you possibly for the purpose of procreation. You need time to heal from this indelible traumatic experience. It’s really hard to get the scenes off one’s mind but it’s do-able. Please, fast and pray. He too should seek God’s deliverance. Matthew 15: 13 – 14 says… Every plant not planted by my heavenly Father will be uprooted …. God will deliver him and save your marriage.

  3. Dear poster Get a STD test first of all. Then decide what best for you and maybe the children i wish you safety and healing both emotionally & physically.

  4. Hello now that money is flowing sit with him and tell him he cant touch you till he declared healthy and fit….please keep praying…..i am sure God brought you to abuja to see the truth….i believe it takes 2 to marry but it takes one to divorce…..may God help balance the situation ogbenutan

  5. Run as fast as your leg could carry you and don’t look back. Go any hospital and carry out an STD test, HIV first.

    Is matter of time before he contract HIV that is if his not infected yet.


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