True Life Story: My Husband’s Baby Mama Is Evil- Pls Help Me
Dear Lively Stones,
Please hide my email address but keep me posted when you share my stories because I want to hear what the members of the house have to say about this. I am at my wits end in this five year marriage. I met my husband about six years ago. Then, he was in the process of divorcing his wife. From what I gathered, they were high school sweet hearts, she got pregnant and he had to marry her to cover shame but they were always having issues and fighting, she broke his head with a bottle and that was when he made up his mind to end the marriage.
They have a daughter, she is 8 years old now, she was just 3 when I met my husband. During the courtship and early marriage….my husband ex made serious trouble for us. She tried to take full custody of the child but court granted joint custody in the end. That means, the girl stays with the mom during school time but spends holidays with us. Anytime it was holiday, she would refuse to bring the girl until my husband go to forcefully bring her.
And she poisoned the mind of this little girl, that I came to snatch her daddy away from them. So this girl hated me even as a small 4 year old. I did everything to love her but she never wanted me. She always clung to her father. Even at night, she would sleep with her dad, and since I insisted I cannot sleep with a 4 year old in bed with my husband , because she won’t let me near my husband without crying, my husband would take her to sleep with her in the guest room.
I know that marrying a man with a baby mama can be difficult but from day 1, this woman and her child have used all forms of emotional black mail to cause trouble in my marriage. when I was having difficulty in giving birth, I could not conceive, I was told the woman was boasting that I will never give birth for my husband because she and him entered a covenant. My husband denied it. But for almost 3 years, I could not conceive.
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Thanks to my church and family, we fasted and prayed unending and finally, God heard my cry. I got pregnant and had a very difficult pregnancy. I even had to move to my mother’s house towards the end of the pregnancy cos I needed alot of bed rest and care. My baby was born healthy but just few days to the naming, my son passed away from high fever. Everyone pointed fingers at my husband’s ex. I was angry and bitter. I did not want to set eyes on his daughter anymore cos even that little brat was mocking me…saying that they will see how I intend to have a child for their dad.
This resulted in a quarrel between me and my husband. My husband got angry because I almost beat the girl for mocking me. He said I should ignore her that she is just a child. She is just a child but see the evil words coming out of her mouth. Our marriage became very rocky cos my husband now decided that the girl will stay permanently with us since her mother’s bad influence was getting too much.
This little brat showed me shege. And I could not beat her cos of her dad. It was a very trying period for me, I will not lie. God answered me again. This time, as soon as I told my mom I was pregnant, she told me to come home. That I will be at home until I give birth and until after the naming and 3 months after the baby is born. My husband kicked against it but for my safety and that of my unborn child, I had to leave.
I tried to stay in touch throughout my pregnancy but hubby was still sulking that I left the house, he was always giving me attitude when I called. He hardly called. I was the one doing the calling most times. What I did not know was that while I was away. My husband’s ex moved into the house. And before I knew it, they were sleeping together. My neighbor called to tell me. I called my husband to ask him and he denied it. I called his family …they were furious because none of them like the ex…she was very abusive to all of them.
My sister in-law advised me to go back to my house if I do not want the woman to take over before I come back. Against my mother’s fear, I went back to my house. True, she was there but soon as I returned, my husband sent her packing. It was like truly, there was juju involved. I had to tell my husband that if he does not cut off from this woman and her daughter, they will keep trying to destroy our marriage. My husband said I should leave his daughter out of it.
My pregnancy is in its 7th month. My husband’s ex send him and me a message that she is pregnant for him. My marriage is over…so now, his ex will now have 2 children for him…hubby is downcast…begging me that he made a mistake but he will never re-marry his baby mama cos she is the devil. Tell me, what is to say that they will not do anything to get rid of me. I have told my husband to choose between them and me…he said he can never choose cos his daughter and coming child, he will never be away from them.
The family said I was being too extreme to ask for him to cut off from them. But I am thinking of leaving this marriage …I want to have my baby in peace…my sister in-law is refusing that I leave but I am tired. I cannot deal with this anymore. Of course my family wants me to come home but my sister in-law and most people are saying if I leave, the marriage will be over…how do I continue to live in this pain called marriage? A husband who has betrayed me, a step daughter and her mother that are devils incarnate?
I need your advise.
Anonymous
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Nne ,you will go nowhere,you will stay there and fight. This is the kind of battle I love to fight,a fight to finish,nne you dare not give up,stay in that marriage and see what will happen at the end.
Trust me,that baby mama no reach. Here is the deal. If truly she is pregnant for your hubby,let her give birth to the child,the truth and fact still remains that you are the wife and she is a baby mama.
Prayer works wonders, keep praying,the same way you prayed and got pregnant,please don’t stop praying,she will surrender and get tired.
As for the little brat,if your husband insist that she stays with you people,no wahala,treat her the way she ought to be treated.
Madam,you must not leave that marriage ooo,abi you one become single mother or baby mama to your own husband ni? So you want to leave so that the stupid woman will come and take over your home with juju,you better stay in that house and occupy it till Jesus comes.
Peace be unto your husband and your beautiful family, amen.
As far as your story; they were not fully divorced before you came in, that’s why they can say you snatched their father or husband. Maybe he would have changed his mind if you weren’t in the picture. Technically he was still married.
If you want to stay and ‘fight’ you can do that but make sure it is worth it.
The man is not a child, he made his decision, his baby mama was not a mistake he just wants to eat his cake and have it. (Playing with 2 women freely)
I think he belongs to his baby mama. You may just be the extra in the picture but since you are married it’s up to you to decide if it’s worth the fight.
This is no marriage, you are wasting your youth. Continue to fight for what is not worth it. Your hubby and his X are making mockery of you but you haven’t realized that yet. By the time she moves in with her children to stay with you(and your hubby who seems to still be in love with her won’t send her away or choose you over her) or has 3 extra children while you are still married to him or probably you loose this one too or even loose your life and leave your beloved child/children at the mercy of this woman who will be their stepmom,only then will your eyes open(I hope it won’t be too late). Choose your happiness first
There’s no marriage there ooh. You will die of stress if you even consider fighting for that man. She’s toxic,she a devil bla bla bla but he went ahead and slept with her. That man has seen who to play for a fool and has gone all in. If you stay,just be sure that what you’ve seen upto this moment is nothing. Be ready for real problem. I rather you file for divorce for your own peace of mind. All these isn’t worth it,trust me. Besides,rather now with only one child involved. You can still meet a better man who will love and respect you for you. Not one who has already chosen his kids even the one who’s yet to be born,over you. How can you say an 8 year old child does not know what she’s saying yet he won’t even make effort to correct the girl. Let me tell you,he’s spoiling that child and she will turn into something really bad if caution isn’t taken. But let them deal with that,just get yourself out of the picture from all these obsession and madness. You’ll be fine nne, God gat you, there’s nothing to fear.