HomeAdviceTrue Life Story: My Randy Father In-law Is Threatening To Expose Me

True Life Story: My Randy Father In-law Is Threatening To Expose Me


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True Life Story: My Randy Father In-law Is Threatening To Expose Me

Hi Lively Stones,

I am afraid of what I am about to confess but I need help, maybe a therapist or a friend to talk to. I know what I am about to say is wrong and I am trying my best to do the right thing. I need your help. My name is Mimi (not real name). I am 33 years old married with one child. My husband and I got married 3 years ago, after dating for 2 years. My husband is Kisha’s brother, one of my former class mate..

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My husband returned in 2017 after spending almost a decade in UK. At the time, he was engaged to someone else but things did not work out for them. My friend told me her brother was back and needed my help with clearing some things, I work with a clearing agency. From business, we got personal and started seeing each other. I liked him alot but he had alot of ladies also flocking around him so I thought its not a serious relationship.

Infact, he never told me he loved me…he said he just wants us to have fun….I agreed. Things were cool. Then his dad needed me to help clear some goods coming in for him and asked me to come see him. When he saw me, we talked business and when I was about to leave, he asked me if I was dating his son…I told him no, that we were just having fun…nothing serious. This man got up and kissed me full on the lips before I knew what was going on.

My man’s father told me that since we have been talking, he has been controlling his hard-on cos he cant stop looking at my cleavage. The man is divorced and I had heard one or two tales of his womanizing just like his son. I laughed but told him I cant have anything because of his son. He told me his son will not mind as long he has told me that we are not dating exclusively. I also know its true cos I am not the only girl his son is seeing.

Things got further and we had s3x. To me, that was just a one off with a randy old man. After all, I would probably never see him again…I refused to even give him my no when he asked for it. But like 5 months later, my boyfriend starts to act all matured and changed…said he wanted to take our relationship further. So, like after one year of casual dating, we became a couple.

Still…marriage was never on my mind. So, you can imagine my shock when after another one year, he was proposing to me. It was a surprise proposal….all our friends were there…my head was telling me to say no but I think I was in love and I was shaking but I said I will marry him. I became scared cos now, it was real…I was engaged to someone that I already slept with his father.

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When he told his about us…his father collected my no from him and called me to ask me if its true….that I am really engaged to his son…I said yes…his father advised me to make sure his son never finds out about us. That it was just a one off mistake…so it should remain a secret in the past. I still knew in my heart that it was wrong but I could never bring myself to tell my fiancé or break up cos I was totally in love with him. I made up my mind to carry this secret to my grave…

Our marriage was cool…everything ok…occasionally argument and misunderstanding here and there. But the major issue is, he also did not stop flirting with other women. I am not really a possessive woman so I tried to overlook his faults.  We have been married for three years with our daughter. Last year, my husband got an irresistible offer to work in Saudi Arabia. So, that meant he had to travel and leave me and my daughter back home.

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My husband was supposed to come back for the holidays but he eventually could not make it and so my daughter decided to go spend the new year holidays with my family. We were with them until the new year and returned back home. The day we got back home, Kisha and her kids called they were coming to visit and stay a few days. I was excited cos my daughter love her kids.

When they were on their way, she texted me to say her dad (my father in-law)  was also coming with them. I wanted to say no but what reason will I give? I said ok. So they came and we all had a good family time that day. Naturally, the kids were happy and having fun all through the visit. But the second night they spent with us….around 3am, someone came into my room and started touching me…I woke up suddenly and discovered it was my father in law.

This randy old man was begging me for s3x….I told him no….we started struggling, I was shocked…I reminded him that we had a deal that this will never happen again…he said he cannot control himself around me…that I should please allow him this once again and he will never disturb me. I refused and kept fighting him off. I eventually got free off him…this man did not give up.

I asked him what if someone finds out…what if his son finds out? he said no one will find out….that I should be quiet so he can do it quietly and leave before day break…I could not believe this man….I saw the same desire he had with me 5 years ago….he seemed like he was possessed….his muscles sticking out….his veins showing so strong. It was then I knew I should not have married my husband cos this man cannot be trusted with the secret of our past.

As we struggled… I told him I will scream but he said I dare not….he even laughed at me…saying ….shout na….who will come this night to do anything….So I had no choice but to start screaming. This man still did not stop. He put his hand over my mouth to stop me from shouting….He was like, he became a beast and a monster…he just kept going…and was saying stop pretending you don’t want me cos I know you do. I fought and pushed him so hard with all my might…he fell and this time, I ran out.

ALSO READ: My Father-In-law Is Evil- He Wants To Destroy My Marriage By All Means-Pls Advise

I went straight to my sister in-law’s room and dragged her out of her deep sleep. I told her to come that her father was not himself. She followed me to my room but he dad had gotten up and left to his room. I told her what her father tried to do but she seemed so horrified and could not understand…

The room was scattered and Kisha said she heard me screaming faintly but she was not sure. Kisha asked me if I was sure I saw her dad or I was dreaming…I told her I was sure…so she went to her dad’s room but he locked his door…even after much knocking …he refused to open up.

I was too scared to go back to my room…so I told Kisha to stay with me. Kisha was still very confused…she kept saying she thinks I was having a bad dream. When it was morning time…Kisha went to ask her dad what happened and the man denied everything. Said he never entered my room nor did he try and attack me. That he was fast asleep. Now, I was the one looking like a crazy person. I tried to tell Kisha that her dad was in my room, trying to force himself on me but Kisha and her dad got upset and said I was falsely accusing her dad.

That was how the holiday visit ended…they left my house that afternoon. Kisha kept saying maybe I had a bad dream and someone attacked me in my dream but I am accusing her father who is 65 years old of trying to r*pe me. At this time, I realized it would be hard for anyone to believe me. I decided to let the matter go after all…he did not succeed in forcing himself on me.

My plan was to just make sure that I do everything to avoid this man….even if he comes to our house and am alone…I will run out or lock my door when I want to sleep. Then that evening, my husband called me to ask me if I am ok…that he is worried about me. I became startled cos I did not know what he is talking about.

My husband said Kisha and his dad called him to tell him what happened….that they are worried for me….that I had a nightmare or maybe I am having a mental breakdown. And that they feel I should not be left alone with my daughter only in the house. I told my husband that I am fine…that maybe it was a bad dream but nothing is wrong. My husband is still worried but I am left to deal with the trauma of the fact that my father in-law wants to sleep with me?

Do you know that since my husband called me to ask me what happened…I have been so scared that I even began to think….maybe this thing did not happen? Could it have really been a bad dream? Maybe the fear I have for my FIL made me imagine he was trying to r*pe me?  That was what I almost convinced my self happened until the next thing happened.

A few days ago, my father in-law called me with a strange number….if I knew he was the one, I would not have picked up….this mas threatened me…that if I try to expose him or refuse him next time he comes for me, he will tell everyone that I slept with him for money when I was dating his son. He rained abuses on me and before I could say anything….he cut off the phone. Am I going mad? What is happening to me? Clearly, I cannot tell anyone or my husband about the call for fear of that I might be exposed…Kisha already thinks I am having a mental breakdown.

Now, I have confessed to the world through lively stones cos I don’t know what else to do.  ….my marriage is at risk…do you think this man will expose us? Sometimes, I think he is bluffing about exposing me cos if he does….he will expose himself too but what if he lies? Hmmm…will he have the guts to tell his own son that he slept with his wife? What kind of a man is this? He has even started convincing my husband that something is wrong with me mentally? I fear when I keep thinking what my husband do if he  ever finds out? How do I deal with this fear hanging over my head cos I do not know what this old man will do next time.

Please advice me.


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A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J


  1. Some experience are personal but when dealing with someone who isn’t disciplined, you must be smart.

    That love for promiscuous man and fear of loosing him has returned to hunt you because your father in-law has no respect for himself, his son and you.

    A typical family without sound value.

    You should have told your then fiancé.

    Well, your best belt is to tell your husband’s trusted person, pastor and husband after hearing from them.

    Do not permit that man’s threat to make you become his bed warmer and whore while married to his son. No matter how well and continously you warm his bed, he will continue to ask for more and may destroy your family to have you to himself.

    You made a mistake to sleep with your girlfriend’s father even if the son wasn’t dating you then.

    Mind you,the next plan will be to convince your husband that you can be alone with your daughter hence should come over to his place or he stays with you to watch over you.

    Talk to your family members. This must surely come to the open someday. Either you loose completely and given a bad name and tag or hate by all even while still married.

    Better your husband hears from you now or you will be a victim with heartbreak.

    The man calling you mental so that nobody takes you serious. Don’t allow him suggest any clinic for checkup.

    Bring your immediate family in and closer now.

    Be smart and prayerful.

    Ask God for forgiveness and remain faithful.

    God’s help to you.

  2. With a father-in-law like this, I can bet you this will definitely come out in the open, he has no respect or care for his son. Do not let him have his way again no matter what it’ll cost, otherwise you will have nothing to defend yourself to people.
    You have the upper hand now that his daughter has heard about it, even though she does not believe yet, when the truth comes out she’ll remember you said it.
    The evil man knows that’s why he is threatening you, he is playing his last card to get you to be his puppet, do not let him threaten you, tell him if he tries it again you’ll report yourself. And honestly, be ready to report yourself or you’ll never have peace in that home. It’s the price you may have to pay for being careless in the past but atleast you’ll feel free knowing you paid it respectfully.

  3. I commend your strength to refused the foolish Old-man when he tried to rape you in your own house.
    For records purpose: try to tape/record any calls from him (either from number or strange phone numbers), even his physical communications as an evidence against him in addition to what @Lovely said in her comments, to build your evidence against the foolish Old-man who had No Respect for himself, neither his son nor daughter in-law.

    Meanwhile, seek the face of God sincerely this time and asked for forgiveness for the past sins and mistakes.
    Ask God to help you open a New page of closer relationship with Him…..to delivers you from traps of the enemies especially your FIL

    Do not be afraid of the Old man’s threat but trust in God. It shall be Well with you. Be rest assured.


  4. Madam,how long do you want to deal with this father in-law’s cheap blackmail?

    My dear,tell them you are not going through any mental breakdown,tell them everything,they need to be aware because e get why.

    You made a mistake by marrying his son,like father like son,you were in love and you married his son knowing full well that you have slept with his father and you think you won’t have issues with that marriage,huh!

    Anyways,tell your husband,call him and tell him you slept with his father when he didn’t define the relationship earlier,you felt he wasn’t serious with you and then you slept with his father,and his father wants to continue with the act now that he knows you are married.

    My sister don’t keep quiet,you better speak up, whatever would happen should better happen now,if not, with his threat,you will continue sleeping with this man oooo,please tell your husband.

    I left

  5. Dear poster, I will advice you come out clean with your hubby before he finds out himself, he may forgive u, cos he will like to know if the affair continued while u both got married, then u can open up to him about his father trying to rape u…u made a mistake by sleeping with your husband’s dad in the first place, but the deed has been done…the best thing to do is act smart and come out clean, bring in your family into it…I warn u,don’t fall for the old man’s trick, if not u will be termed all sought of names, it’s now u can talk because u didn’t continue the affair….everything will be fine dear, peace…


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