True Life Story: One Last Good-Bye Kiss Led To A Huge Betrayal-PT 2
Dear Lively Stones,
(Here is the continuation of the story from yesterday. CLICK HERE TO READ PART 1 OF THE STORY)
That was when the bomb went off in my husband’s head. He was like….barely four weeks? But he kept quiet and did not say anything until we got home. By this time, my heart was pumping so hard…I thought I was going to have a heart attack. When we got home…hubby asked me to sit down and said…honey…your pregnancy is barely four weeks…that means its not mine…
My knees just gave way…I fell to the ground and started crying. I kept saying I am sorry…I don’t know….hubby became so angry and said….its not mine? You mean its not mine? I said I don’t know…he got up and called my parents. He was shouting and telling them I was 4 weeks pregnant and the last time we had s3x was five months ago. My parents became alarmed…they kept asking me what happened…I was too afraid to talk.
The next thing…I fainted from panic and crying alot. When I recovered…hubby was no where to be found. I called and called him but his number was switched off. I called my mom who told me she was coming to Lagos the very next day. I was able to tell my mom about the only other man I had slept with and my mother was like…I should not tell my husband until she gets to Lagos.
When my mom arrived….she wanted to slap me. She was so upset. She said I was going to abort the baby and claim to have a miscarriage and that I should tell my husband the baby was his but I must get an abortion and tell him the baby miscarried. My mom was able to call my husband to come and she asked me to boldly tell my husband that the baby was his but my mouth failed me…
As I opened my mouth…I spilled the beans. I told him…I slept with someone in Dubai but it was a huge mistake because the man took advantage of my being all alone in Dubai. I knelt down and told my husband I was going to abort the baby and asked for his forgiveness. My mother’s eyes almost killed me. I told my husband to decide whatever he wants to do…but that I will never allow myself to betray him this way again.
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That was when my mother too knelt down and started to beg. She told my husband that she even asked me to lie but I refused ….that she is begging him to forgive that it was the devil’s temptation seeing that our marriage has been through so much trials. My husband got up, went and packed his things and since the last one month…I have never herd from him again.
My husband blocked me on all his numbers. When I tried to reach him through friends and family, I was told that he told them not to tell me anything. I went to his office….his security was told not to allow me in. I did the abortion and almost died of pain and frustration. Even the doctor asked me not to do the abortion cos of my slim chances of getting pregnant. I did it anyway. I was sick for two weeks. Even my mother left me cos she was too ashamed and embarrassed.
My dad came and he stayed with me for a week. It was my dad that finally convinced my husband to talk to him. He told my dad that he needed some time to think and get himself to accept the fact that I betrayed him. So until then, he does not want to speak to me. I am living in the house alone.
I have tried to commit suicide once. My domestic staff found me and they told my husband. My husband asked my parents to come and take me home so I do not harm myself but I refused so, my husband told my domestic staff to watch me all day and night. Someone must stay by my side yet he has refused to talk to me or see me.
Its been two full months…I love alone in our home…my husband is still not talking to me. Everyone is still begging him for me but he still cannot see me or talk to me. I sent him an email and begged and begged him. Every day, I go for confession and ask God to help me touch my husband’s heart but just few days ago, my husband told my father that he cannot continue the marriage…so he has told them to ask me to stay in the house as long as I want but he is not coming back.
My heart dropped…this man loves me…I know that…that is why he cannot look me in the eyes…the betrayal is too much…yet he has refused to kick me out of his house…he says I can stay as long as I like yet he wants nothing to do with me…hey Jesus…what do I do to get my love to forgive me….I know I betrayed him….I know nothing can change that but what then becomes of our marriage? I do not want to loose him…I will not move out but how do I get forgiveness and acceptance from my dearest husband….how….how…how.
This burden is too much….I probably deserve to die for my mistake but death had refused to come…so what becomes of me…how long do I stay in this house where I am no longer wanted by the man who once adored me? I blame myself….I can blame the fact that I was abandoned in Dubai and I was going through so many emotional pain but I just want my husband back…otherwise…this life is not worth living….the pain of this separation is too much.
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What else can I do? I know its hard to forgive a woman who cheats in this society but if it was a man, he would expect forgiveness…why is forgiveness different for a woman? I was not in an affair with anyone…that trip was filled with a lot of temptation and I was alone without my husband…I was hurting and needed my love and attention but it was from a stranger that I received the attention.
I only wanted to give one last good bye kiss, to thank him for keeping me company but the devil had different plans…oh My dear husband, I am not justifying my actions…I will never justify my actions but what else do you want from me? I need help, prayers and advise.
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Please don’t leave the house,keep staying there,keep praying, keep begging him,don’t commit suicide,God will not be happy with you.
God bless you sis
So sad but you need to see a therapist that can help you deal with this pain and anguish. You can’t do this alone. You need extra strength.
Don’t lose you yourself in all of this don’t let depression eat you up. You need to gradually start accepting your reality. You made a mistake but you can’t live in that mistake. Forgive yourself. Seek help from God,
As for your husband, he is feeling so many things with is even more than the fact that you cheated on him. Imagine that you slept with someone else once and you got pregnant. Meanwhile you have been married for years and couldn’t conceive. It is a lot for a man to deal with. Give him time to process and make his decision.
Please, don’t commit suicide. You will end up in hell fire, if you do so, which can never be compared to any suffering on earth.
Remain in the house, since he didn’t ask you to leave, which means he still loves you. It’s the pain of betrayal that is too much for him to bear.
Take this matter to God. Ask God sincerely for mercy and forgiveness. Then continue to ask Him to touch his heart. Seek for prayers from true people of God. Keep sending him texts.
I believe God will touch his heart to forgive you.
I join you to pray that God should touch his heart. To err is human but forgive is divine. Let divinity touch his humanity so that he can forgive you.
Let me first sympathise with you DeaR Poster.
Though, you ll pardon me as well cos, i may sound off- line in some ways too. hopefully your husband will read and reason along to heal faster too.
Firstly, i sincerely, do not like the fact that you want to kill yourself and you aborted the pregnancy! how was JESUS CHRIST BORN?
secondly, your life is too lonely. Obviously, money/ wealth / luxury is not everything. we watch these things in movies ,how women in luxury goof.
thank God you have a conscience to feel sorry for what youve done . Please dont loose that conscience in your life’s journey.
Thirdly, I just listened to my pastor preach a sermon about Joseph, the earthly Father of Jesus , where the scripture says ” Joseph , BEING A RIGHTEOUS MAN would not want to put Mary to public disgrace , thus he planned to quietly call off the wedding.
And my pASTOR ASKED: can we see why JOSEPH WAS AJUDGED A RIGHTEOUS MAN? such a man who can find these age? Rather we have men who are ready to cast the first stone while, if tables turn, they may fall at slightest tests of life?!
Now back to your story Dear, you have operated a lonely life. you have been through alot which has made you vulnerable. a man may not go half of what youve gone thro , especially your waiting experience and will fall for a skirt.
. . Please give your Hubby time, time and time again to heal. since he loves you, you keep going back to his creator, your creator in prayers, HE ll heal you and engage his heart for you.
pleaseeee, stop beating yourself this hard! shits happen o. this is your own shit and you ll come out of it. Be remorseful, be sober, but give yourself to prayers not depression.
Because, infact, the way youve been, makes me afraid that, if someone hurts/offends you, you may also find it hard to come to terms and forgive such ,just the way your husband has been to you !!
Please, start seeing this experience a growth process, build your strength from within. engage in exercise, it will heal your soul. You cant get acceptance and forgiveness so soon as you want it .
Please give yourself time, sayweeks to even months.
Everything will be fine but you need to do as above .
it ll be well.
My question is are u sure that man can get woman pregnant? After how many years of trying to get pregnant for ur husband, n just one night of careless kiss n sex,u just got pregnant,
I just hope that that man is man enough though
My dear, just give urself time to heal,God will help u,He will see u through.
[…] ALSO READ:True Life Story: One Last Good-Bye Kiss Led To A Huge Betrayal-PT 2 […]
You seem to desperate wanting him to come back and not worrying about your health.
Get a life please, get something doing to keep your mind busy. You are a good woman, some women would willingly go outside of marriage to test if they can get pregnant and rub it on their husband face or let the husband train a child that is not his. You didnt do any of this.
Try and get something doing that wouldnt let you feel so lonely, something that would fetch you money to move on with your life if your husband eventually never comes back. Give him time to heal while you keep your self busy after a year or 2 leave the house if he didnt come back and start your life again.
It isnt your fault he couldnt get you pregnant and it might not have been entirely his fault too. But letting you worry for so long with no certainty of experiencing motherhood is not ideal. This doesnt justify you cheating, what is wrong is wrong.
At the end of the day Love alone might not enough for him to come back to you, Trust is broken here and even if he comes back he may not be the same man you knew.
Get a life, keep the hope alive, plan of a future if he doesnt come back. Lifr goes on.
[…] ALSO READ: True Life Story: One Last Good-Bye Kiss Led To A Huge Betrayal-PT 2 […]