True Life Story: Why My Sister Is Against My Relationship
Hi Lively Stones,
My elder sister lost her husband about 7 years ago. He was a medical doctor and he died of cancer. They just have one son who was 11 year old at the time. The family of her late husband wanted to take care of her, so they processed papers for her to relocate with her son to the US.
My sister is a beautiful woman and her in-laws love her so much. After a while, our family and her in-laws started talking about marriage for her. They wanted her to remarry and they wanted her to marry their relative that is in the US as well. She and this relative tried to date but according to her, it was not working out cos she broke up with him.
Unfortunately, my sister got involved with another man who is married but his wife in Nigeria. Her in-laws were not happy about it but my sister was defiant. Their affair brought about strain for families involved. The Man’s Nigerian wife got frustrated and filed for a divorce.
My sister and the man have been living together for a year now. She wants to marry him to get a residency but its like the man is taking his time because he was also flirting with one of my sister’s friend. Seeing that the man is not serious, we her family have asked her to move on, that her in-laws relative was still very much interested in her but she refused, insisting it must be this man.
While all of these was going on, my sister called me to say the man was coming to Nigeria for a visit. She asked me to accommodate him cos his house in Nigeria is still occupied by his ex wife. I agreed. I did everything in my power to welcome my sister’s man and make him feel comfortable in my home. My girlfriend was around during the time he was in my house.
After he left, my girlfriend and I started having issues. I mean, I thought we were having the normal relationship issues but before I knew what was going on, this girl broke up with me. I love my girl so much, so I was not going to let her go easily. I begged and begged her. It was her cousin, whom I was begging to help me talk to her that told me that my girl and my sister’s man f*cked while he was in my place and he has promised to take her to US.
I confronted my girl about this and she denied it. she said her cousin is talking rubbish. When I called the same cousin, the cousin denied …saying she was just pranking me. Which kind of prank is that? So, I asked my girlfriend why she wanted to break up and she explained that she was getting tired of our relationship. That we have been together for almost 2 years, yet no proposal in sight. I told her to give me till the end of the year.
My girl and I are back together but I can’t lie…I wonder sometimes if she indeed tried to hook up with my sister’s man when the man was around. So, I said let me warn my sister. When I told my sister, she was like, its very possible because she knows the guy has tendencies to stray.
My sister then warns me not to marry my girl cos she suspects my girl must have slept with her man. I told her that I cannot dump the girl cos I did not catch them together but I feel she should leave her man after all…she knows him to be a flirt. My sister said I cannot tell her who to date or marry cos she is older than me but she warns me, that if I marry my girl, she will cut me off for life.
Please does this even make sense? I am so angry with my sister giving me ultimatum. That is now affecting my relationship with my girl. Is this fair? Should I dump my girl or should my sister leave her man? Why should she tell me to leave my girl while she stays with a man who is clearly no good for her? what is so special about this man?
My sister has reported me to my mom, saying that I am part of the people who do not wish her well, that I know she loves her man, yet I want her to have high blood pressure by marrying someone who wants to marry me to be close to her husband and maybe steal him one day. My parents are saying for peace sake, that I should consider my sister. Is this my sister mad?
Why should I be unhappy just to make her happy? Its one thing if I have evidence that something truly happened with her man and my girl. But I have no evidence, the cousin is still saying it was a prank, just to get my reaction. What if this her man never even marries her? I would have sacrificed my happiness in vain.
I need your advice please. I think my sister is selfish or do you think I am paranoid? What should I do? This relationship could cost me and my sister. I need your guidance.
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