My husband rejected a court marriage and now He is pleading for it.
“I got pregnant nine years ago while dating my current husband and then the issue of marriage came up.
I wasn’t working then. He told my family and I, that he doesn’t want a court marriage for no reason.
My parents tried talking to him, I cried and begged him severally to legalize his marriage with me but he stood his grounds not to wed me in a court.
I involved his family members to help me beg him but they said, he’s old enough to make his decisions.
He even refused to do a white wedding either because my church requested for a court certificate, so we ended up doing only traditional marriage.
I later got tired and gave up on the matter. I was hurt and broken but I resolved to marry him like that just to save myself and my family the shame of having a baby outside wedlock.
My dad was angry and disappointed in him but he didn’t care and because of that my dad vowed to see me a successful and independent woman with or without him.
After I gave birth to my baby, my dad helped me secure a job with a multinational company and things started to turn around for me.
I could now take care of myself and secure a future.
Though I married my husband, but I never forgave him from my heart and it made me not to do anything in my husband’s name.
We currently have three kids together but all my properties are in the name of my children. I never used him as my next of kin either.
Just last month my company decided to transfer me to a branch in Texas and the company is willing to pay for my entire family to relocate with me.
My husband’s business is not doing too well and he’s willing to relocate also but we have no legal certificate to show that we are married.😒
Now he wants us to go to the court to legalize our marriage and I have said “No” My dad has threatened to disown me if I ever go with him to court.
He’s been tagging me everywhere as a bad wife who is not loyal to her husband, spoiling my family also.
His family members have been calling me trying to persuade me but I told them I’m old enough to make my decisions also and I have stood my ground just like he did to me nine years ago.”
What is your advice to this young mother?
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Madam, kudos to you. Stand your ground. Do not give in to his emotional blackmail and his family’s.
Why does he want to now legalized his marriage? Because you now have the upper hand. Ma’am, listen to your dad and let him remain here in Nigeria
Hmmm madam u just need to forgive him n move on with d court weeding,u dad has his own life to live don’t let ur dad dictate for u ow u will rule ur home. Kindly forgive him for d sake of ur kids at least u have also benefit From him giving ur kids! Pls don’t look at is attitude years back it was unfortunate he didn’t realized something good can’t still come out of u.don’t allow his life to be rude out bcos is still d father of ur kids,find a place in ur heart to forgive him n let him know ow u felt when he turn d court weeding offer down….give u father reasons y u needs to forgive him and beg ur dad too to find a place in his heart to forgive him… Pls let us learn to have spirit of forgiveness in our marriage
You are old enough to make and stand on your decision….i would advice you don’t go with him…please take your children along
My dear go ahead with your plans.. he is only reaping what he planted years back. Ignore his family and anything anyone has to say they are not being sincere..
If he was he was old enough to make those decisions then.. you also are old enough to make your own decisions now period..
Congratulations and I wish you all the best.
Why are you bent of court marriage? What is special about court marriage? If this man has this opportunity that you have now do you think he will seek public opinion before taking you along with he’s kids to Texas. His only crime is court marriage not that he’s abusive husband or cheating on you. He has been providing for he’s family to best of his ability but his crime is not doing court wedding. You’re free to travel to Texas, New York, Colorado or New Jersey alone without he’s kids. You cannot take kids to where he cannot have access to them. Your father this your father that, why would you father interfere in another’s mans marriage? When your father married your mother did anyone persuade him to marry in court or shrine? This man never asked you write his name in your property. Women always playing a victim card if the man have this opportunity and refused to take you alone this same people asking you to stand on your now and I’ll call him names. If you can’t take him a long don’t go with he’s kids. Texas is not ticket to heaven cheers
Madam go with your children biko,what goes around comes around. Lesson learnt
Madam forgive him and do the court marriage, take him to Texas because of your children. As long as he is a good father and husband let peace reign and forgive. Soften your heart biko. Yes revenge would have been the best but what I know is that life is too short to spend on revenge. Be the bigger and more matured partner and legalize your marriage.
Being a single mom is not easy don’t let anyone deceive you. Don’t break your marriage rather build it. Let it be on record that you did your best
I believe your husband has realized his mistake. Probably he’s not educated enough to know the importance of court certificate of marriage especially in matters concerning the State.
Or maybe he knew, but wanted to block you out.
Whichever is the case, madam, please, forgive him. God has blessed you today and the table has been turned around. Both him and his family that supported him then are now begging.
Please forgive. Your dad will not marry you if you end up a single mum abroad. For the sake of your kids and the fact that he has not been a bad husband to you, forgive and have the court marriage with him and take him along.
I believe he has learned his lesson.
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