God Answered My Prayers & Gave Me The Best Man But His Mother Hates Me
Dear ma,
I need counsel. I am very shy about what I am about to ask but I feel your counsel and that of the house can help me. I am 37 years old,single,working and very well to do on my own. I have not been fortunate in relationships. I dont know why but I have left my faith to God.
Being 37 is no joke. I crave companionship and its not easy. However, I also know God will do it at His time. So, for the past three years, I have been single…I focus on my work and socialize once in a while…basically…live my life sha.
Until About seven months ago. I was shopping in our estate shop when I noticed this young guy. I have been living in this Estate for 7 years now. I actually use to come visit my sister when she was living in this estate with her family. They moved to Canada and so I took over their apartment.
So, I have been coming to this estate shop for close to 7 to 9 years. I know the owner of the shop,an elderly woman who is quite friendly. Her children use to help out in the shop during the holidays. I knew them like young teenagers in University.
Seven months ago, the young man I saw in this shop was her second son who had just finished his service and started work. He is 26 years old. Very handsome boy. And very polite too. He attended to me that day very respectfully…took my number to deliver some bottles of water I ordered for but they didn’t have at the time.
That is how he got my number and from time to time, he would chat with me to greet me or just say hello. From there, he would like and compliment my status pictures. He became my friend on social media…and then he stared sending me some really lovely romantic messages.
I ignored him and told him I would block him. He then called and said he liked me and wanted to date me. Hmm…in my mind…a small boy like you? He was like…age is just a number. So, he has been persistent and I eventually blocked him.
Two months later, I ran into him during my morning jog in the estate. He stopped me and begged me for just one date. I told him no and he said what am I afraid of. I told him: his mother…she will never allow it. He laughed and said his mother is aware he has dated an older person before.
I unblocked him later. We chatted until I was comfortable enough to let him come visit me. My mistake. This guy is too slick. Too smooth…he came around…bought me flowers and made noodles in my kitchen…helped me clean up and we watched movies together and stated making out.
I don’t know who taught this 26 year old boy how but he literally made my knees so weak. We had s*x and he is the best I have ever had. what is wrong with me? I am 11 years older than this boy….even though I look younger. I told myself it was a mistake but that was the beginning of our relationship.
Since the last five months, I have been secretly seeing this guy and I have never been so happy. Now, he wants us to tell his mother. His siblings are aware…well…his younger brother is aware and he is cool …but I am scared to death about his mother. Remember, she is friendly to me.
I told him to tell his mother and whatever she says…might determine how we move forward. He told his mother last week. And like I predicted…all hell let loose. She came to my place…rained curses on me…asked me to leave her son alone or she would arrest me…called me a cradle snatcher…etc…
I cried and cried but my guy stood by me and is still standing by me. In fact…he has been staying in my place since last week…refusing to go back home and says he wants to marry me …whether his mother likes it or not.
My sister is not so happy about this too…but my mother is supporting me. Cos, I am getting old…she said its ok as long as the guy loves me. To be honest…this guy is the most matured guy I have dated…even though he is the youngest.
I see why his mother is so attached to him…he is like her golden son…very cute…very well behaved and very helpful. He works but soon as he gets home, he helps her and always caring about her. Same thing he does for me….such a perfect guy…
Please what do I do…I love him so much…since I been hiding after his mother came to embarrass me but he has been so supportive….saying that I should be patient…that his mother will come around…that she knows she cannot determine who he marries. ..
I have been trying to listen to him…maybe give his mother time to come around but I fear she will always hate me in her heart even if she accepts me for her son’s sake….she will always see me as much older. This age difference will always be an issue…especially with the mother…do I want that kind of life?
This is the situation…please help me. This guy is ready to settle down on his 27th birthday in February. He wants me to marry him in a small intimate wedding…just our families and small friends in attendance. I love him so much…he is so s*xy yet he calls me the s*xiet girl on earth…
I tell myself everyday to find the courage to break up with him but every time I see him…I melt and loose my voice…I do not ever want to let him go…God answered my prayer…gave me a perfect man who is 11 years younger than me and now…his mother wants to kill me.
what should I do?
Anonymous
Photo Credit:Purewow
You cannot marry that guy,the age difference is so wide. Leave him alone and let somebody else come. Marriage is a life time journey oooo,11 years is not a joke ooooo don’t allow this thing called marriage elude you ooooo
Let me ask you this question “if you were in his mother’s shoes, would you allow that kind of relationship”???
11years is too wide…If it was lesser, that would have been something else…
He loves you now, will the love forever be there cause of the age difference…One of my niece got married to a man who’s 5years younger than her and now, things ain’t going smoothly between them just because he felt my niece is aging faster and she doesn’t sooth him any longer…
Do what’s right now so that you won’t regret it later in the future..
I just read it, I also feel for her.
Truly age is just a number. It depends on the two parties involved.
I have met people who are older than their husband and one won’t know. they still cherish and value each other.
Even those that are younger than their husband some still disrespect their husband.
My own advice is she should be patient, and as long as the guy is standing by her through it all she should just be calm and let things unfold. Cos I know the mom is angry because of the age difference she might come around later and it will be like as nothing happened.
Follow your heart, the mother is only doing initial gragra,please good men are scarce this days evil spirit have pososes most of them, they behave unruly, na that you meet a good man on no account you should leave him, stay with him love him, respect him and care for him, I rejected a guy because I senior him but he married somebody older than me minors education, she is very old without education or money, he does the hostling while she do the money spending, I regret my actions everyday whenever I see this cute couple, babe get sense and hold your man tight.
Be hopeful that your relationship will work. Even if the mother agrees, be ready to deal with her rejection from time to time (its just human}. You have to be strong and confident that things will work out. As long as both of you are ready to do the work, then you will have a good home.
Pray and follow your heart, the mother will definitely come around. Just give it time.
Your story is touching and its quite unfortunate that it turns out like this when the pair is good.
There’s no way you can marry him. Lets not look at what his mommy is saying. His mom is being sensible and there’s no questioning about that.
First at that age, you no longer have the body that can birth two and remain in shape except u want to do cosmetics. A woman’s body is her destiny; i tell u he was not attracted to you cos of anything but your body. He wouldn’t have noticed u at all at first if u were very rich, too classy but shapeless cos he won’t be needing the first two that much but the third.
This your guy is really into u cos of your shape, brain and class but he has clouded his thoughts to see that this your shape wont be so appealing like it is now in the long run except you make sure your shape does not rubbish your brain and class and i doubt this given your age when u start popping kids.
I tell u exactly the way it is.
Good luck to u whichever way it goes.