Her Boyfriend Gave Her An Ultimatum-To Follow Her Dreams Or Get Married
Greetings ma,
Please I was directed to you concerning counselling. It’s not actually for me but my friend.
She is a year 3 student and her boyfriend wants to get married to her immediately she has her degree which is next year but then she wants to further her studies abroad but the guy is not in support of it saying he doesn’t want a ghost wife and that if she wants to pursue her dream then she should forget about the relationship. She is confused because she really loves the guy and does not know what to do.
He desperately wants to settle down by next year and wants his woman by his side not getting married to her and then she lives to go and study abroad.He desperately needs a home cuz he says there is so much pressure on him to get married and that he also wants to give birth to his kids early.
She’s scared of loosing the guy yet she wants to go further her studies that’s what make her confuse. He has everything and a successful man and assure her of a better life and to give her all she wants but he wants marriage nothing else.
She wants to pursue further education but out of the country and the man has refused that he doesn’t need a ghost wife, how can he be married as still live as a bachelor is what he asked.Her sister abroad may want her to came for studies there and she doesn’t want anything coming in between her family and her.
Please advise my friend.
Anonymous Lively Stones Whatsapp Member
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Well. The thing is your friend cant have both at same time. This life no balance at all. She should also know that no guy should be a factor. Left for me , I will suggest she goes to pursue her dream.
Forget all this men ooo to me she should Pursue her dreams oo if he cant support her now when will he start
Bia nne you better marry that man oooo,you already have a degree and I believe you can still further in Nigeria, there are still some good schools in Nigeria here.Anyway the choice is yours, marry the guy or study abroad.You love this guy,he is okay,so what do you really want?Biko check it well ooooo.
Please take note once a man is under pressure then he’s not ready for marriage… please kindly further your education… your right man will locate you……. Don’t let anybody tie you down with marriage…. He can change later on, and you will be regretting it…. Please don’t let anyone think you can’t do without them… you will fine and will be great with marriage
You have nothing to lose whichever one you decide to choose, if he’s in support of you furthering your education and the only problem he has is you travelling abroad why don’t you marry him and further in your country. But if your studying abroad dream is stronger and you won’t find it difficult over there (that’s with finance and accommodation) go ahead and add more values to yourself over there, good and successful men like this one will come looking for you because of your value at the right time…
Think about it
Give yourself time to really ponder on these goals !
Do you think if you further your education is better for you than to get married now? Or, the rather to marry now and further your education later either in the country or abroad ?
The choice is yours….. but commit everything to God in prayers and ask Him for divine guidance before you make that choice !
Achievements in life goes with different level of sacrifices.
It is Well.
She better advanced herself because if that guy is her husband he will wait
Young lady: are you desperate to marry?
Why should this be up for discussion? Ask yourself this: whatever decision you take today,will you be happy with that decision in 50-80 years time?
That is not to say: if you both agree,you can sign an agreement that you can do your degree when you are married but people can change afterwards..be careful.
I would say…fulfill your dream..go to school as you may regret you sacrificed your dream for marriage.
Both of you should sit down have a heart to heart conversation. If you both love each hard enough…then you could both come to a mutually agreed compromise.
No fear in love…if she is afraid of losing him…then she already did.
Let her pray about and follow her dreams…marriage will happen with the right person who will support her dreams and ambitions.
Cheers.