Please I need a relationship advise. (Kindly pardon the errors) I recently met a single mom of two via SM based on job. We chatted and she wanted to relocate to Ibadan. I helped a bit to find a place but was not lucky. She finally got one on her own and we met and I helped in setting up the house.
After relocation and we set up the house, I bonded well with her kids and she showed signs that she in love with me too. She also seemed comfortable with the fact that I am a young man still living with his parents. Sometimes, My mum would be calling profusely to know my whereabouts, and the second day I was there, I felt she didnt like my mom calling too much.
And I tried to make her understand that it’s been long I been in a relationship. My family think I am an introvert. I havent gone out in 3 years from morning till night, that is why it would look somehow to them. Moreover they knew I was with her. Days after days, we still in communication and she even wanted me to sleep over.
I got home and my phone had issue. She dropped missed calls as messages which I was unable to reply any. She blocked me b4 I could know it. I reach out to her on my other what’s app and called till I explain.
She later told me, how caring and loving I was but I complain alot ( all I complained about was food) and that I have some certain mentalities that revolves around my parent that she feels she wants to change and maybe something can still happen. She raised my hope a bit.
I had a dream 2 days ago about her. Coz I stalk her alot, I know when she is online and would not want to disturb her to chat and she won’t chat me up either. I will go to her twitter and read her tweets and replies to people’s tweet. I discovered I was getting jealous and insecure.
She barely knows them. I know my parents. What I want is what they give to me. They don’t force is to do things. They go with our ways but give advice. I already told my momma about her. She objected initially but I made her see that I loved her. She said okay and gave advise to be careful so that I won’t regret.
But, I love her. She won’t just want to give me a chance. It’s burning me seriously whenever I can’t chat or communicate with her. I am really into her. I can’t even go to her place anymore, coz we barely talk. I won’t just want to go and sit down all day.
What do you advise me to do? Of I want her to go, I am finding bit difficult to let her go just like that. I have been emotionally attached to her.
She removed my number from her saved contact. Everything just went sour in a blink of an eye. Please help me.
Thanks for your time
Single mums….hmm be careful. I STRONGLY ADVISE you be CARFEUL man. You know what tell her, you to have a kid or kids and see how she reacts, if she wants you to care for her kid or kids and she has a problem with you having a kid or kids…. Pls know she is just out to enjoy what you can offer and not cos she loves you.
Also you said she told you her past life and marriage, my Bro she maybe lying, she may even be the one at fault in her past marriage and the husband dropped the marriage, I need you to ask her can you talk to her Baby daddy but only after you guys are talking normally with no issues..hope you get me all along. Back to the issue, I think the issue is we don’t love ourselves enough, that’s why when the person or persons we love disappoint us..we get seriously heartbroken, my man don’t trust anyone, I’m telling you from experience..so love yourself so much that even if on your wedding day, the lady says she doesn’t love you, you won’t even be to bothered. You are much stronger than you think man. Man up, and love yourself. Blessings
You need to be patient. Find out why are first marriage didn’t work. Some ladies also don’t want to remarry( all they want is a man friend) so she may be in such class.
Also what are you own plans? Are you ready to settle down? Where will you live when you get married?
You also need to show high sense of responsibility by telling her plans and not being jealous. Remember she is a single mom which must have made her grown more than her age so you must be patient with her.
Finally try and get her family members/ pastor involved they can help you work things out. But if you are not ready to settle down soon, just leave her alone and let her be.
[…] of dating a single mother is what motivated me to send my story. (Read yesterday’s story here). This young man’s story is similar to mine. I am 33 years old and I dated a single mother of […]
Hello,
Single or divorced or widowed women have tasted marriage and they know what they want and what they cannot put up with. Sometimes too, they have trust issues.
Now,its up to you to try and reassure her that you will be a different man from what they have experienced or they fear.
And its not in your words but in your actions. So first…you need to move out of your parents place.
No woman wants to come live with a man in their parents place.
And as for your family…they need to love her and reassure her by accepting her and calling her and encouraging her .
Its a tough one but if you persevere…she will believe in you.
Except of course…if there is someone else in the picture….maybe someone more emotionally mature and ready…then you you have got competition…you either try and win her over or you leave her be.
I wish you the best.