Click here to read Part 1
Part 2
I was scared to tell her anything. She took my quietness for shyness and she said..what happened, did you and hum have a fight. I nodded. She said its ok…that is how lovers fight. Can you imagine? My Aunt thinks we are lovers!…I just wanted to be left alone. I went to my room and slept all through that night. I think what he gave me still had some sleeping effect on me.
The next morning, he came with fruits and milk. He was showing my Aunt he was a caring boyfriend. He came every day for the week. When anyone was around, he would be showing care…calling me his baby. But soon as we are alone…he be begging me,..and promising heaven and earth.
I told him to give me time. And with time,I began to believe he made a mistake and he was truly sorry. I also thought I was beginning to fall in love with him . He was truly a nice and gentle person. I forgave him…he was already talking to my mother in the village. Promising to come see my people after the lock down.
That is how I got engaged over the lock down to a man who raped me. Sounds weird right but he made sure he was so kind to me, that I felt comfortable around him again. I have never had anyone love me really so it felt good to have a man who was showing me love and care.
As time went on,I noticed that our house help became very rude and unfriendly towards me. I had to ban her from coming to my boyfriend’s house …and she didn’t take that lightly. I also thought she was getting too comfortable with him. Eventually, I asked her to give me her phone. She refused. I dragged it from her and saw that she has sent nu-d-es to my boyfriend.
Much as I wanted to be upset with her, I realized that my boyfriend was also chatting with her. I confronted him and he said she was flirting with him. I didn’t believe him. Why…cause he raped me remember? So, I told him it was over. He was begging me, saying it happened before we started dating and when we came together, he stopped.
My God…my head wants to split. I told my Aunt it was over. But my Aunt believed him and sent the house help away. She said she has been suspecting the girl and that I should not allow the stupid girl ruin my opportunity to marry a rich and handsome man.
I am confused. Truth..since the rape…he turned a new leaf. Kind and never touches me again. He sends me weekly pocket money. He calls and sends me love notes. Our wedding introduction is end of this month. I am just praying I am not going to regret this.
If you were in my shoes…what would you do?…I have never told a soul he raped me because he has truly changed. But with all these rape stories I been reading online..Should I tell mu Aunt about the rape…will she believe me?…I wonder if I am not going to regret marrying a man who raped me and also asked our house help to send nu-d-es.
Can he have really changed? At least..for the last 3 months…he has shown me nothing but love and care. Will he always love me like this after marriage? My Auntie and my family think he is a saint and do not want me to allow a small mistake with the house help to ruin everything…Like I said…if you were in my shoes,what would you do…
Anonymous Lively Stones Facebook Fan
Photo Credit:verywellmind
Did he changed?. You’ve seen a sign of who he is twice. First, he raped you, second your maid sending him nu-d-es. To be candid, you’re entering into a slayer’s den. Speak out, tell the world who he is. A rapists.
My dear don’t be fooled again, the warning signals are there full time in HD and you still want to enter, pls open your eyes and see what he is capable of doing.. Open up
Please please and please, do not rush into that marriage. He raped you before, that may be a constant occurrence in marriage. By then, you’d be at his mercy. Why didn’t he ask for your hand in marriage without having to rape you? To me, this guy is bad news, and you need to tread with caution. Have you tried to find out what truly made his first wife leave? Two strikes (raping you and his trio with the house help) is not coincidence o. Look well please sister, before you regret this… by then it will be too late.
He raped you and your house help sent him nu-d-es, my sis leave him alone and dont make a decision you will regret throughout your life.
Don’t be decieved by his money.
Regards.
Me personally will never allow such a person come close to me ever again because he is a very dangerous man. He must total distance himself from me like a million miles.
Why didn’t he try to have a proper relationship with you, woo you, ask you out etc…he rather choose to drug and rape you. The answer is very clear my sister, he is a pervert, don’t fall for his fake pretence. Run for your life!!!!!!
The signs are very clear my dear sister don’t be a victim the second time. Tell your family what he did to you and cancel that engagement.
Please don’t keep quiet over this speak up before you end up regretting the decision you are about to take.
It takes more than gifts and care to sustain a marriage.
My dear sister,I don’t know you but I just see u as my own biological sister and I will advise you like my sister. Pls don’t enter into that marriage,I was once a victim of a cunny and deceptive man like this,I escaped his tricks n deception because I didn’t keep the secret to myself. I opened up and I was saved. My dear,this man is a devil in human nature,what he is showing u now is not love and care but rather using tricks on u cos he has seen u are innocent. It might interest you to know that his wife left him cos of his wickedness and unfaithfulness. He drugged n raped u and he told ur house help to send nu-d-e pics to him n he is lying it was before he met u,balabala!! Pls don’t go into that marriage or u will end up in pain and sorrow forever. Pls forget his useless money and deception. Just open up to ur anty about d rape and don’t let her convince u that it was a mistake. God who has provided the money till ur 300 level must surely finish it up. Pls don’t rush into this marriage of deception. Look before you leap. Marriage is not money and money is not marriage. Be wise and be vigilant. Above all,go down on your knees and cry to God and beg Him to save you from this wolf called man n trust me no my sister, God will definitely act. May the Almighty hand of God rest upon you and save you from this mess.Amen. I wish you the best.
Please dear, don’t make the mistake of going into that marriage now, with everything that has transpired I think 3months is too short a period to be convinced he’s changed.
First, open up and tell your aunt and family that he raped you, now that you still have the time. Forget about him being rich and handsome, like your aunt is saying, you will be the one that will face the music when it starts.
He’s is playing with your head, try distance yourself from him for a while and think things through.
You asked “…If you were in my shoes,what would you do..”
To be honest, I will opened up to my aunt and family, explain to them I will be the one and Only One who will face the music whatever happens in my marriage.
There’s a fear of uncertainty in your heart. It’s a Red flag.
Therefore, I will walk away from the relationship!
Good luck
If I was in your shoes,I would pick race…Caring or not,he raped you and was chatting silly with your house help…You don’t need a soothsayer to tell you what to do because the signs are boldly written all over him…
My sister,don’t marry him or you will live to regret it..
Hello,
For the future, please note that it can be quite dangerous to be alone with a man in a secluded place, He took something very special from you.
It seems he really wants to marry you now because He sees you are a nice girl, to avoid getting into trouble, you were a virgin, he’s guilty and in need of a wife.
Marriage is not something you enter into hurriedly though. You should not make a permanent decision to be with him the rest of your life because of a 3 months relationship and what transpired .
Do you have peace in your heart? The foundation is wrong. He desecrated you. If you marry Him what is the guarantee He will treat you nice ? He won’t abuse you later? You’ll have a voice? He won’t do same with someone else when you are about to have a baby or your relationship would not be all about s.x?
Are you completely sure of what happened with his first wife? Did they divorce under Biblical grounds? Do they have children? What part did He play in the breakdown of their relationship?
I’ll say , let you aunty and Parents know. Put an end to this marriage taking place . Check yourself medically , carry on with life and let God bring someone else who will ask for your hand honourably and who you can get to know before making such an important decision.
Please don’t let this experience make you give yourself to any other one before marriage . Get deeper in Christ and He’ll sort this out.
However if you decide otherwise and family insists you must marry this man.
Take some time , no s.x, get answers to all questions above , involve his Pastor, be sure of his person and character…. in the law it may have been acceptable to protect the lady and make man responsible ( except for other complexity involved).
Deut 22:28 – 29 ‘If a man happens to meet a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her and they are discovered, he shall pay her father fifty shekels of silver. He must marry the young woman, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives’.
I wish you speedy recovery.
RUN now you won’t Hear..
Please dear open up to your aunt and family members before it is too late. Walk away from this guy please. This guy is a pervert and a leopard cannot change it’s spots. A word is enough for the wise.
For me I still insist speak out..you will regret ooa broken relationship is better than a broken marriage.
Remember the guy who just murdered his wife and killed himself if she were told that would be her end she would have sworn with her life that was a lie..run for your life.
If i were to be in it shoes God for bid,i will run for my dear life, because the Egyptian I saw yesterday, God knows i wouldn’t see them anymore,my dear forget that man n that scam of a marriage, before u end up like his ex wife, remember u said he’s a divorcee ,n as a matter of fact try fyning out what happened to his ex wife, please don’t marry a man who drugged n raped u all the name of love, after now ,u will know the true colors of that man,n please tell ur family about that rape,a word is enough for the wise. Good luck
[…] Read Part 1 & 2 Here and Here […]
People can pretend for months or even years but can’t pretend forever…marriage is not something you wake up and enter into, if you rush in you will definitely rush out take your time …study him be sure if he has really changed or may be he’s pretending and acting good so you won’t tell anyone what he did. Please be wise!
Tell your aunty so you will know her thoughts about it.
[…] here to read part […]