True Life Story: My One Month Old Marriage About To Collapse! Pls Advise
Dear Lively Stones, Please Let’s Advise this Woman…
Pls ma kindly hide my identity. My Marriage with my husband is just 1 Month and a week Old. There is this money I have in my Acct, it is my life Savings about N1.7 million…I kept this money in a Fixed Deposit Acct since 2017….and unknowingly to me my husband saw the alert on my Phone and that was the beginning of issues in this 1 month Marriage.
Before then I have told him that I want to add a new business Line to my Old business to enable me get money from both sides…Over since 3weeks he has been given me attitude, not talking or eating together with me anymore.. If we are Sleeping on the bed together he will turn his Head down ward to the Opposite direction i.e if my head is on the Pillow he will Put his own head near my feet @ the end of the Bed….
READ ALSO: My Marriage Is On The Verge Of Crashing
I have begged him to tell me my offence, he said nothing, that I didn’t wrong him. I asked what is the problem, he refused to speak until yesterday night when I reported him to his Best friendship and what he said was a shock to my life……He said I have that amount of money in my Account and I refused to set up Business for him knowing fully well that he is not doing anything for now so I was shocked…..that so all this time he has been giving me attitude so it is because of my money that I refused to release to him. Then I boldly told him that You u never loved me only love my money. I have seen that u came for a purpose…He said if I didn’t release the money to him that I should forget the marriage that he is not doing Marriage with me again.
My answer to him was…. Well there is nothing that my Eyes will see now that will make me go cry out blood. But again I thought about What will People say, won’t they say this is the 2nd husband that She married again and can’t retain the Marriage! Maybe it is my Destiny not to be with any man bcos this is my 2nd Marriage….The 1st one didn’t work out so I just remarried a month ago and this is already happening again. My question is should I give the money to him or I should let him do his Worse?
From: Facebook
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Capital No ,why would he be entitled to your money and it’s barely a month you both got married ,that means he knew about the money before you both got married ,but I don’t understand why some men are like this ….my opinion tho
This business of people putting the ” what will people say” bullshit to every dilemma they find themselves in. It’s very obvious you’re in that marriage alone. Giving him that money won’t guarantee him staying married to you. You better file for divorce yourself before you even bring up any further discussion. When you act desperate, you’ll have no one to blame for the consequences of your decisions.
Dear poster, your husband is unserious and greedy, why is he being entitled, don’t give him the money, I say again, don’t make the mistake of giving him…..
How long did you date this man? Hope you didn’t marry him in a rush because you had issues with your previous marriage?
Why didn’t you delete such kind of financial alert from your phone immediately,aside your husband knowing,it is not good having such financial alert on your phone for security purpose.
Your husband has to do his worse in this case oooo,he needs to go out to work like other men,if he hadn’t seen that money, wouldn’t he have looked for a job to do in order to provide for his family? Don’t you ever try giving him that money( your life savings since 2017),if anything happens to your business now,what will you fall back to?
Your husband doesn’t love you at all,real and reasonable men don’t act and behave in this manner. Look let me tell you,if you eventually succumb to giving him that money with this his nasty behavior,you will suffer in that marriage,he will milk you dry ,use you and send you packing at the end of the day,be warned,be careful and be guided. My dear use your head,he only wants your money.
Are you sure you didn’t marry him? You actually paid and did the marital rights with your money,no wonder he has the temerity to demand for a woman’s sweat,shame no dey catch him. Don’t release that money,if possible,put a strong password,he mustn’t go close,and watch your back in that marriage, this person can harm you,a person that can give you attitude all because he saw some certain amount on your phone,huh,be careful my dear because E get Why.
Peace be with you!
On top person money again,are some men for real bikonu? Ihe nka owunu rice
My dear, don’t give him any shishi. Let him do his worst, if you can live in the same house with him as co-tenants, then you can focus on your life but for a second thought, let this guy not kill and take possession of what you have, you just have to be very careful.
I will appreciate it if we can approach this matter from a Reality point. You claimed that this man is your husband and you’ve just wedded, but he’s not doing anything for now as per work. Help him to stand on his feet if you actually married him for real.
I believe marriage is meant for both parties to contributes and strives for the progress and success of their homes.
Sit him down and dialogue on what you planned to do with your Own money: also let him explain exactly what business or trade he intends to invest on. Both of you should look at legibility of the business before you are committed
There’s absolutely nothing wrong if you can grant him loan to start up his trade/business out of your Savings BUT DO NOT GIVE HIM YOUR ENTIRE LIFE SAVINGS….. PLEASE DONT !
The truth is, Marriage is Sacrifices and Commitments from both parties involved…Not One-sided marriage.
You can work things out through dialogues and understanding. Don’t give up yet. Your man will come around and understand you.
Peace be to you !
I am sure you knew he didn’t have something doing before you married him. So what was your plan? Did you ever discuss this issue?
I do have an issue in the approach your husband took because he could have simply discussed this with you without keeping malice.
I think you should discuss what he plans to do with his life and how much he needs to start a business, let it be something reasonable.
Since you now know his attitude, please going forward do not keep delicate information like that within his reach. Not all men are the same.
If you must give him something, you shouldn’t be coerced or manipulated into doing so. Chill, let him do his worst, he is just being greedy. I’m not against you supporting him to stand on his feet but don’t give him your entire savings.
Two wrongs don’t make it right ,let’s be mature here .firstly ,before you both got married you are very much aware he is not doing anything and you agreed to forge ahead with marriage.in the cause of your, do you ever discussed what he will be doing to take care of you after marriage?if no,you both make mistakes .you could have discussed this extensively before end up with him.
Secondly ,Marriage required a lot of sacrifice and submissiveness, it’s your marriage if you decided to help him to be on his feet and you will be the one to enjoy it at the end of the day not all your life savings .Help him with good mind ,God bless you more ,don’t let the people advising you to file for divorce cos you will face the consequences alone so think twice .
Thirdly,your husband is a very childish in thinking ,how can a good man could be giving his beloved wife attitudes on top ordinary alert .why can’t he sit you down and discussed it maturely ,even some good men will present it in the way that you will end saying sorry my love I didn’t tell you about it ,but he’s not mature enough to handle the situations.
Finally , decisions to remain in the marriage depend on you .weigh the option of his attitudes aside this one ,evaluate everything together if you can let go of anger and pride ,you will definitely get it right my sister .pls think twice before filling for divorce and never tell anybody ,anywhere to do his/her worse cos you never know what everyone is up to damage who are fighting .I wish you well by the special grace of Almighty God