True Life Story: How I Lost Everything In My Relationship To Pain & Trauma
Hi Lively Stones,
Please keep me anonymous. Today’s story (click here to read story) moved me to want to share my story. Sometimes, couples split up due to reasons they cannot explain but if they truly love each other, they will find their way back to each other if they meet again somehow. I met Jaison (not real name) in my final year. I was in my home state Bayelsa. He came from Lagos for a party organized by one of my mum’s business partner, a very well-known wealthy business tycoon. There were many dignitaries in attendance. We were at the same table and exchanged nos. We started talking after that. We got tighter and started a long-distance relationship.
I visited him in Lagos and sometimes he came to Bayelsa. Things were getting serious. My youth service was worked to Lagos so we can be close. After camp, I moved into Jay’s house in Ikoyi. Jay engaged me after my camp experience. Everything was going fine. Even though I read Chemistry, I do event planning and that is what I wanted to do as a career and with Jay’s connection, I was already getting jobs even as a youth corper.
Every event I planned, I got mad reviews and got even more popular and patronized. That is how one of Jay’s uncle who lives in Epe gave me an event to plan for one of his political associates. I was used to planning political events but this particular one, I pulled all stunts. I had to even move into a hotel days before the event. And it was a grand event. Although it finished very late around 1am in the night.
Guests were happy, still drinking and socializing. I decided to retire to my room then. My hotel room phone range around 2am and it was from the host of the event, Jay’s uncle’s friend, the politician. He said he called to thank me for organizing such a beautiful event and he wanted to thank me in person, he invited me to join him and his personal friends on the roof. I told him I was grateful but too tired to come. Then he said he wanted to introduce me to a friend who needs my services for an upcoming event.
So, I said ok. I was already in bed so I wore a pair of shorts and T shirt and went to meet this client and his friend. When I got there, there were three men there, drinking and smoking shisha and I think cocaine as well. I was offered a drink…I refused but they insisted so I took a few sips. I sat down, and chit chatted for a few minutes. One of the guys took my no, the one who said he has an event to plan. We were still talking but that was all I remembered.
I woke up like hours later….in my room….but I was not wearing my shorts….only my T Shirt….my shorts was on the floor…my head was pounding…I felt some cramp…then it hit me….I put my hand in my vagina…..and semen poured out. I had been drugged and r*ped. I fell to the ground….trying to remember last night…how I was with those three men…talking and they must have druuged me….and someone or is it three of them must have r*ped me. I was shaking….
All I could do was call my mom….I was crying….couldn’t even say much when my mom picked up….all I could say was mom please come….I have bee r*ped….my mom was screaming and crying….asking me where was….I told her in Epe….she asked if I had called Jay…I said no…so my mom dropped called Jay and jay called me immediately….I could not even spill out any words…I was just crying. Jay called his Uncle…his Uncle said he was in his way back from Epe but he would turn back since he was closest to me.
Long story short, Uncle, Jayce all came and took me away. They kept asking me who and I said I don’t know whodid but I was with Jay’s Uncle’s friend the politician and host of the event with his friends. Jay took me straight to the Island….I was taken to the private hospital where I was treated immediately. My mom flew in from Bayelsa that day. It was the most traumatic experience of my life. I wanted to die. Not even my father’s passing eight years ago was this painful.
My mom and Jay called in the police and tried to arrest the politician and his friends, but they are very big people in the society….they had immunity clause and were very influential people in society. Their legal representative said that I was invited for drinks and smoke…that I came willingly and there was s3x but I also willingly participated. It hit me….all three men must have had their way with me. My mom with all her connections could not touch these men. I was flown out of the country to go and heal.
Jay was so hurt too….he blamed himself for allowing me to go for that event. Eventually, there was alot of pressure and blackmail. That we should accept a settlement. Or they would destroy me and my mom and also post the video of my getting r*ped by three men. I was accused of smoking cocaine while partying with sugar daddies wearing bum shorts. It was too much. My lawyers advised that we take the settlement because its is as good as an admission of guilt on their part.
The incident broke me completely. Affected my relationship with Jay, we broke up. I felt too bitter ….I tried to put the entire incident behind me and start life afresh abroad. Jay tried to keep in touch but I did not want to, so he stopped after a while. Jay got married last year. I saw their pictures online and I cried. I have not been able to find love or be with any man since that incident happened to me. My elder sister got married last December and I travelled for the wedding. This is my first time back in Nigeria after three years.
ALSO READ: My Neighbor R*ped Me Because He Is In Love With Me-Pt 3
After the wedding, on my way back to UK, I met Jaison on the same flight as mine. He was so happy to see me…he quickly upgraded my flight to business class so we can sit together all through the flight. We sat together and gisted all through the six-hour flight…in fact, time flew by so fast, it felt like only one hour. When we landed, Jay insisted on seeing me while he was in UK. We took an uber to my place…the attraction and chemistry was obviously very intense. Jay was saying he told God if he ever saw me again in life, he would do everything to get me back.
I kept reminding Jay that he is now married, and I do not want to come back to Naija. Jay wants to divorce his wife. He says he married her to forget about me but seeing me, he cant forget anymore. A trip for one week ended up being one month for Jay. He spent the entire January with me…telling his wife it was business…I felt very bad but for the first time in three years….I felt happy and safe again.
Jay and I want to be together, make our life work….I can see how people may view us….how we got an innocent woman like Jay’s wife involved but its not our fault……life was cruel to us….we lost each other and I almost died … but we want to make things right…we deserve a chance to be really happy and I am deeply sorry to the woman involved …we never meant to hurt her. Jay had told her about us and she has refused to accept it. She has gone all over social media to call me names and brandish me a homewrecker.
I am not a homewrecker, but Jay convinced me he is not in love with her….agree to come back to him…I found out I am pregnant too…I found out two weeks ago. Jay and I always wanted a baby since day one. Is this not God’s hand? Is this not a sign of our second chance? See where circumstances have pushed us. Having read our story, I hope anyone hurt by us can forgive us…forgive me…. To the one involved, I hope you can read this and no that I never intended to hurt you. I want people to put themselves in our shoes….are we bad people for what has happened?
Am I to blame having to go through r*pe and trauma…am I to blame for feeling weak and losing the love of my life? Everything was taken away from me by three untouchable men who karma will visit one day….for three years….it was pain and trauma….Do I not deserve a chance to be happy after all I have been through? How do I lose everything, my dignity and self-worth to three evil men and still loose the man who loves me? Am I a still a homewrecker?
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Whose fault was it when you decided to go and see the three evil men? You refused at first but when you were told that one of them wanted to plan an event,an event that will give you somuch money,you went. You knew you needed to rest from the stress you had gone through but you still went.
You came back to your room and didn’t lock the door,all you saw was your short on the floor and semen.
Let me just tell you,in as much as you have decided to treat Jason’s innocent wife this way,karma is also waiting for you just like karma will deal with the three men that raped you.
She is a woman like you ooo, remember. You were the one that broke up with Jason,he begged you but you were too weak to accept him back as at that time. Afterall,it wasn’t Jason’s fault,so why didn’t you accept him?
Anyways,I’m not in support of this ,you have successfully destroyed another woman’s home,I hope it will not be done to you and no amount of excuse can justify the evil deed.
This is all I have to say to you,you were remorseful at the beginning of your story but at the end,you seem not to care about Jason’s wife,just dey play ooo, dey play. You went to live in the UK ,yet you couldn’t look for your own man and leave your Ex alone with his peaceful marriage,abi. There is God! You lost everything,I wonder what you even lost sef. God is watching ooo.
You lost everything,were you a virgin before you were raped? You lost everything,did Jason leave you? Rather you left him. You lost everything,did the men steal from you? No wahala,shebi you don carry belle,I wish you all the best………
As much as I sympathise with you, I will tell you the truth. You know he is married and you are living with him doing all the things with him, you even tried to say its GOD will, no, you are just being wicked to your fellow woman, is this “women supporting women”. Why have you decided to be greedy towards a fellow woman, why are you this wicked to her. She called you a homewrecker, yes, she is right, you are a homewrecker. Change your evil ways and stop making excuses to justify the evil you are doing to a fellow woman. I wish you well sister.
Madam I’m sorry for all you have been through.
But note . You better leave some body husband ooo. Jay was begging you after everything you refused. And my gender no d reason well. If not one who refuses to come back to you ,no go back to am. See my dear with or without pregnancy leave some body husband alone.
If not that after the break up with jay you are still single, no serious relationship .that’s why you are now seeing that you and jay are meant to be together again . If you where to be married since all this things has happened.if jay come back begging you I’m sure you will never accept him . But as you see say go no won go you come the justify your situation.please tell jays wife that you are very sorry and she should forgive you. Tell jay that you cannot marry him let him go back to his lovely wife. No make that woman and the law of nature to course you and your generation oooo. With para I rest my case.