True Life Story: My Wife Is Bringing Bad Luck And Frustration To My Life-Pt 2
CLICK HERE TO READ PART 1 OF THE STORY
...CONTINUATION
I shared the first part of my story because I did not want anyone to think I am being influenced by what I am about to reveal. Even though I feel my marriage was a big mistake, I am trying to do my best for the sake of my children but I need your advise on how to handle this matter with my wife…How do I know my wife not a destiny destroyer? Please advise me because, in the midst of all that has been happening with my wife, its like my luck wants to shine again. That is why I am asking for advise. What is happening now is that, my ex, Gloria who is the only woman I ever loved years ago just reached out to me.
Never miss a story — subscribe to Lively Stones Relationship Blog PUSH NOTIFICATION for daily Post to stay up-to-date on the best of what LIVELY STONES has to offer, from juicy celebrity relationship news, romantic articles to compelling true life stories.
Gloria and myself were in a three years relationship. That was the best relationship of my life. I loved her so much but I was not ready to settle down at the time, she tried to persuade me but I was not ready financially or mentally. So, Gloria got married and moved to US with her husband. Gloria and her husband are now divorced and she has been reaching out to me.
Gloria is now a US citizen too. When I started having issues with my wife, Gloria and I began to get close again, even though she was abroad. But now that things with my wife have gotten to this level, Gloria is asking me to consider this may be God’s way of giving us a second chance. I mean, this is the probably the only woman I have truly loved…and with how my marriage is, is it not obvious that I married the wrong woman?
Gloria is a nurse in the US, she earns very well, she only has one child and getting married to her will mean I become a citizen soon…the only condition is that I must fully divorce my wife before I come over to marry Gloria. My wife and her family have refused divorce papers I served last week. They are making my life a living hell. They say they want me and my wife to reconcile, they are making all kinds of promises which I know they cannot keep.
They are now saying I should give my wife money to start trading on Okrika clothing. That they will monitor her to make sure she does it well this time. The thing is, I don’t want to borrow any more for this woman…I am still paying my corporative loan . And from what I am seeing, she will not be able to manage any business…she just can’t. And to think that the family did not strongly caution her about cheating on me, in my own house but proceeded to lay the blame on me for not providing food money is not going down well with me.
The father said any man that can not provide for his family is an infidel, so why do they want an infidel for a husband? They are telling everyone in my village that I am trying to run away from my responsibility as the father of our children. That made our village council to call me and my family for a meeting. We got there and explained everything to the council. The council fined my wife six months suspension; that means, she will stay with my family in the village, so that they will watch her to see if she will change and be of good behaviour.
More from Lively Stones
- I Forgive My Wife But She Still Left Me After The Cheating-Please Advise
- I’m finished! I cheated on my wife with a Church girl, now this is happening
My family and her family are in agreement of the council decision but the problem is…I don’t even love my wife…I never did…why can’t they just leave me alone? Is there any need to wait to see if my wife will change after the 6 months suspension abi probation? I know she will pretend if she has to for that six months but while I am wasting six months,
My fear is that, if I wait six months, what if Gloria change her mind…she may think I am trying to waste her time like last time. I keep asking myself if God did not want me to be with Gloria, why did she appear all of a sudden when I am going through all these problems with my wife…and now, Gloria is single and living abroad….and I still love her. I don’t want to regret this opportunity.
Please advise me…will this six months probation save my loveless marriage, will it change my lazy and cheating wife? Or should I stop procrastinating and force the divorce so I can move on to Gloria, a woman, who I love and will change my fortune totally? I need your advise.
Anonymous
Do you have a story to share? We want to hear all about it. Email us at [email protected] or Whatsapp +2348029870309
Share this
With what you described, will your wife suddenly be able to manage a business and would it bring in enough to meet your families need? Probably not.
Will she cheat again? You can’t say and may not know if she does.
Do you need to run paternity test on all 4 children? Certainly yes and take care of those that are yours to reduce the financial issue ( they all maybe)
Do you have grounds for divorce according to the Bible if you decide you can no more continue? Yes
Should you take care of your children if you decide to divorce? Most certainly YES!
Is her parents response to infidelity acceptable? Most certainly NO
Will she change after 6 months? Will your marriage be restored and will you boom financially? It’s not a definite yes, you both have to work at it. Your finances may still be as is for some time except new streams of income open up mostly to you
Should you move on and and marry the ‘love of your life’? Is it even scriptural (Why did she divorce her husband?) …. I’ll leave that to Jhanze to respond but search the scriptures on divorce
In all this, you decided on the wife you choose.
All the best
Your wife’s family is right. You are running away from your responsibilities and you are worse than an infidel.
You didn’t love your wife but you were fucking her and now have 4 children you both cannot take care of and want to run away from because of your selfishness.
You don’t love Gloria, you only see an opportunity for a better life there.
If you leave what will happen to your own seed?
You have 4 children.
Mr Man, be patient, pray and lead your home. Keep speaking to your home and wife tye way you want them to be.
The grass is only green on the side that it’s watered.
Please marry Gloria,she has been the love of your life,you people separated because you weren’t ready for marriage at that time.
Your wife is not ready to change,if they like she should go for 10years suspension abi na probation,she cannot change. She was brought up to be independent and lazy.
Move to the US and discuss how you’re gonna take responsibility of your four children, meanwhile be sure the four children are yours.
Udo
Hello Poster,
This is a very delicate matter but this is my advice:
1. Take a deep breathe…..relax and do some deep self reflection.
2. Prayerfully seek out a therapist or counsellor, one that is sound professionally and on the word of God.
3. You and your wife alone need to attend therapy sessions together, to talk about the major issues affecting the marriage
4. Both of you will decide if after these issues are enumerated, if you are still willing to give your marriage a chance.
5. If one party is not willing, then you must give them some time to pray and process the situation more. If after a period of time, there is no willingness, then file for separation
6. If both parties are willing to give the marriage a chance, then there must be agreements on the burning issues around financial management, infidelity and trust and integrity of both parties. You must set boundaries and make certain commitments to love and respect one another. There will be a promise/vow to let go of the past….heal together and never make reference to those hurtful past
7. Both must never allow negative family influence the decisions of the marriage
8. The US ex is not an option. If perhaps, many years after a divorce happens, then that is talk for another day
This type of situation needs fasting and prayers….guidance and counselling…for both parties
They can overcome any challenge they face except one party is no longer willing to make the marriage work.
Let love and patience guide you. Let forgiveness help you heal. Take your time.
Let God lead you as you make your next steps.
I pray for permanent healing for your family.
In Jesus mighty name…amen
One, send your wife back to her parents house to learn manners, she is a wicked and irresponsible woman, send her now.
Two, do DNA test, I repeat DNA test, don’t be a fool man, do DNA test, so you won’t be spending money on progenitors not yours.
Three, forget about your ex, you have no business with her, forget her absolutely.
Four, don’t go to the US to your ex, the US is anti-male and pro-female, their laws don’t favor men, from domestic violence, false rape accusations, divorce settlements, child custody, alimony and other analogous issues. US hates their men, don’t let your ex deceive you, it may look rosy now, but when she lies against you of.
You are WARNED, forget your ex, if you go to the US, you will regret.
I wish you well.
✌
Dear writer,
It’s important you understand that jumping into opportunities aren’t the best approach to settle issues especially marriage issues.
No matter how beautiful an opportunity could look,not doesn’t suggest that it’s the best opportunity for your situation.
Your ex has her baggages and what you need isn’t about taking a step in that direction but to sort your issue to the end.
Take time to pray, as God to change your wife for a harmonious relationship and peace in your home. While at it, ensure you both get help aside your family members and village elders.
Your marriage had kids involved and not one to back off from easily.
Have a heart to heart talk with your wife and see if she is willing to change and give yourselves time to try.
Be responsible and confirm the paternity of those kids first.
Be responsible, cut your wife off from her biggest influencers that’s only if she is willing to make the marriage work.
Do these wholeheartedly, not haphazardly with America woman on your mind.
Where thing’s don’t turn out better with all the steps above, go for separation but remember to protect your mind and stay in health.
Don’t forget to cater for your kids ,come. what may.
Don’t let this press down on your health.
God help you.