True Life Story: Please Advise-Will My Unborn Child Pay For My Sins?
Hi Lively Stones,
Please keep me anonymous. Do you believe that the sins or punishment of a parent can be passed to an unborn child? I already know some people might bash me for what I am about to share but this has to do with life….and I taking a decision that I could regret for the rest of my life. So I met Jerry on a dating app. I went on dating app because, its difficult to find someone that is genuine and real these days. I chatted with Jerry for like 2 months before we decided to meet in person.
Jerry is a very nice guy. He told me he was divorced from his wife, heartbroken and just needs a woman who can accept him for who he is. Jerry also did not like talking about his divorce, he said it was too painful and he needed to forget and move on. So things were great until like seven months after.
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That was when Jerry told me that he is very sorry but that his wife is trying to come back and wants to work things out. I must confess, I was heartbroken because I had come to fall deeply in love with Jerry. That day he told me, I cried and cried….and then he made love to me for the last time…it was more like a good bye S**….and it was like my body and soul was not ready to let go of Jerry but I could see that Jerry wanted to try to work things out with his wife.
Exactly, six weeks after, I discovered I was pregnant. I was confused. I did not know whether to tell Jerry or not….that good bye S** was a sign that Jerry is someone I can never forget in my life…why else would I get pregnant….we have been having S** through out the relationship….why now? So, I concluded that it was God’s will but I was not sure if I should tell Jerry.
After talking to some close family members, I was advised to tell Jerry because he has a right to know as the father of the child. So, I sent Jerry a message that I was pregnant. Jerry called me and was so surprised. He kept asking if I was sure and if I had not been with anyone else. Those questions angered me but I told him I was going too keep the baby cos I wanted to remember him through the baby. And I am 38 years old, single…why on earth will I abort a pregnancy at this age?
Jerry asked me to abort the pregnancy cos it would upset his wife if she found out. So I told him not to tell his wife. I was ready to keep this a secret. I dont even need anything from Jerry cos I am well able to take care of myself and the baby. Jerry reluctantly ended the call. Four days later, Jerry called me…and when I picked, he asked me to hold on, he put the phone on speaker.
The next voice I heard was a woman’s voice…she introduced herself as Jerry’s wife. She said she wanted to talk to me, woman to woman. She said that she is aware that I am pregnant for her husband. The lady went on to start begging me to abort the pregnancy. That she and her husband were going through a rough time in their marriage but they are trying to build their marriage back but if there is another child outside the marriage, then she is not sure she if she still wants to work on the marriage.
To me, Jerry ambushed me by calling me to listen to his wife beg me to abort this baby. I felt so bad for her. Infact, I was so ashamed that it was me that was standing in the way of her marriage and happiness. I promised her that I will never disturb her or her husband and she can count me as dead to her…cos, I do not think I can abort the baby. I told her the baby was not planned and I believe that this baby is innocent and should not be aborted.
The next thing, the woman started cursing me, cursing my baby…that I am a home wrecker…that my baby will be an imbecile….that I am will never have peace since I don’t want her to have peace…that I will bury my baby cos the baby will not make it for me to eat the fruit of my labour. I was shocked at the anger and hatred in her voice….I was still trying to calm her down but she refused to listen…I had to end the call.
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And since then, I have been crying. The words this woman hurled at me is really shaking me….I am afraid for this child I am carrying….I know she is angry but I did not get pregnant intentionally….its God that gives children and life…who am I to take this unborn life? Please I need your advice….as a woman, I know how Jerry’s wife feels but how can she ask me to abort this child that did no wrong? Is abortion the only way out?
I have begged for her forgiveness, I have begged God for forgiveness even though I did not hurt this woman knowingly…how can her curses affect me when she and her husband were divorced at the time I slept with him?….I did not force myself on Jerry…this child was conceived in love…why did God allow me to get pregnant from the last S** with Jerry? Please I need this woman to take back the curses she made…cos truly, I have not been myself since that phone call. I don’t want her anger to avenge me to be passed on to my unborn child.
What is my sin? Am I the first to fall in love with a supposed divorced man? How is this all my fault all …all alone? What should I do please? I need advice.
Anonymous
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Dear Poster,
I feel your pain and your words showed you are a good person but a victim of circumstances.
Keep your child and do not abort the child to please anyone. Ensure that you stay away from Jerry and his family.
You are the mother and all your child has. You must be bold and strong to defend your unborn child.
Do not cower rather go in prayers and counter the woman’s words with your strong good reasons. If God gave the child to you as you believe, God will keep keep the child also. Ask God to forgive you and fight for your child.
Jerry told you he was divorced and the S.e.x was consensual based on that knowledge.
Remove fear since you had no intention of taking Jerry.
I must point out that when he told you he was going to work on his marriage, you should have zipper up and leave emotions out of it.
Next time, so not allow yourself to sleep with a man when you know he has no lasting love to offer you.
Avoid divorced and separated men on dating app even widowers, they are heartwreckers most of the times. If you allow yourselves to date without S.e.x, you will find out they still love their wives and willing to return to them. Don’t be carried away till you say I do in a traditional and court way.
Once again, bless your child daily, pray for your child and yourself, remove fear and stay away from Jerry and the wife.
All the best.
Dear poster her curses has no effect on you nor the baby, rather she should be cursing her husband. What if you die in the process of aborting the baby? So she and her husband will be happy at the expense of your life.
Pray for your pregnancy journey and live with no iota of fear in mind.
Don’t fear, start speaking words over your child. Cut every time with that family. If possible move to another apartment so they can’t find you. Do not abort for any reason.
Dear poster,Jerry knew his wife was making plans of reconciling with him yet he continued with his affair with you.
A man who really wants his marriage to work out shouldn’t be seen on any form of dating sight,do you know how many girls he has met before you?
Anyways,you dey fall hand sha,I can’t believe you’re bothered because an ordinary woman like you just decided to whine her mouth and you’re scared of your unborn baby, abeg move joor,she just dey play,curse ko curses ni.
If you’re capable of taking care of the child,please do because I’m sure Jerry will come back for you,him and his wife are not even serious. Jerry will come back for you,when his wife shows him shege banza pro max then he will remember you. It is well
Just be at peace with yourself, nothing dey happen but you make mistake oooo and you are blaming God,you shouldn’t be having unprotected S.e.x oooo unless the person is your husband.
Be at peace cos of your child nothing will happen to you and the baby
Dear poster,
Please, don’t abort that innocent baby you are carrying. You’ve already asked God for forgiveness and I believe he has forgiven you.
You are no longer a baby.so don’t put your life on a hold for another.
All the best sis.
Nothing will happen to you and the unborn child. Your intentions are clear not to have Jerry for yourself. Don’t abort but confess positive words over child.
It’s well.