True Life Story: Help: My Husband Suddenly Moved Out Of Our House
Hello Lively Stones,
Someone mentioned that I need to speak to a marriage therapist, I checked online to find that Lively Stones is the number one relationship blog in Nigeria. My husband and I really need, to speak to a counselor even though he has refused to agree to it but I don’t know what else to do. Right now, if you ask me what the issue is, I don;t even know what I did or went wrong.
I need your help. My name is Caroline, I am 33 years old woman, I got married to my baby daddy last year. Before our marriage, we were dating for almost three years before I got pregnant, he said he was not ready for marriage but we were cool. But on Valentine’s day last year, he surprised me with an engagement and we got married in April last year. Since we have been married, every thing has been fine until like four days ago.
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Four days ago, I noticed that my husband was unusually very quiet. I kept asking him if he was ok, he said he is. I asked him why he is so quiet, he said nothing. At some point, he sounded like my asking him was irritating him so I decided to give him his space for a while. Then two days ago, my husband called me and told me that he is no longer interested in our the marriage, that the marriage was a mistake and that I should know that he is no longer interested.
My mouth was just open, confused…I was like, what happened…did I do something wrong…he said…its not me, that he is the one. That he realized that he made a mistake by proposing to me, that he has not been happy for some time, that he tried to mask his feelings but he realized that being married to me will never make him happy. I begged him to tell me why he was not happy with me…he just kept mute. I started crying….he didn’t even flinch….he walked away to the visitors room and slept alone that night.
I cried myself to sleep. Before I woke up, he was gone. He left me a note, that I should start looking for an apartment, that he will pay for it and send me monthly upkeep for me and our baby. That he will be filing for a divorce as well. I called my parents and family…everybody has been asking me, what did I do to him….I have searched my heart, I cannot recall doing anything to him since we got married.
Yesterday, I had to report to his family. They too were very shocked. They told me to be calm, that they will call him to ask him what is going on. But I have never been able to rest since. I have been fasting and praying, I don’t know where this attack is coming from, who is trying to take my husband from me? Why will a man just all of a sudden decide to end a marriage that has been nothing but peaceful and happy.
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Is there a woman behind all these? Is he having an affair with someone? I have never had any reason to suspect him to be having an affair. He is a good man, a good husband and father. This matter is really confusing me, I need you people to pray for me and advise me on what to do. I never forced my husband to marry me…even when I got pregnant, he said he was not ready for marriage…I didn’t pressure him….now he married me on his own…why is he saying he wants a divorce now?
Everyone keeps asking me what did I do to him…I did nothing….literally…nothing. Since we got married, I have never been disrespectful or cheated. This is a great shock to everyone. Some are saying he is being manipulated: so who is this strange person manipulating him? how do I go about this matter? How do I stop this person from taking my husband away from me and destroying my happiness? I am loosing my mind….please help me.
Anonymous
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Dear poster, I think you are doing the right thing by telling both families and praying.
The only advice I would give you is to make sure you have something doing to sustain yourself and your child just in case it still goes south.
Wishing you all the best.
You have to put your mind to rest. He has moved out let him be for a while and then study him.
You must keep praying and interceding for him
It may not necessarily be another woman but something else is troubling him.
It’s disturbing but you need to calm yourself.
In the face of chaos, we must calm the war within then think right.
You did well to get his family and yours informed.
In your place of prayer, ask God to arrest his troubled spirit, give him clarity and deep peace.
It could be that he wasn’t ready to have family when he had one , maybe he proposed marriage because his family or friends encouraged him to bring you home and give the baby a family name. It could that he was in love with someone else who didn’t want him then but wants him now or maybe, he married you in hope to love you and be happy but his heart may still long for the other person.
No matter what the case his, trust God completely to show up.
Pray for a wholesome marriage and home.
Pray for his peace of mind, clarity and focus in his life then family.
Pray for God’s influence over his heart and choices to favour his home.
Pray that his love for you will grow and his fears crushed.
Pray against external or inner manipulations. Let God reunite your family again.
Trust and focus on God alone. Don’t panic. Have plan B but don’t loose faith.
Request his family to visit and speak to him if he insist on you leaving with his baby.
I hope you have something tangible doing that brings in money for you? Be sure to have savings and increase your earning. Help where necessary and make the situation a steppingstone stone not a stumbling block to you.
I pray that you will return to smile.and share your testimony.
Be calm and prayerful,this too shall pass.
Allow him for now,he will come back to his normal/right senses.
It’s well,these are some of the challenges some people face in matrimony. Just be at peace,take care of yourself and your baby. The Lord shall come through for you.
Peace
Hello dear,
It will be ok. Please be strong for your child.
Don’t kill yourself thinking what did you do?
His family knows what’s happening, that’s good. Your husband may be dealing with something, give it sometime, let him see you gar it, don’t act like your life will crumble if he leaves. Most importantly, intensify your prayers but from a place of peace.
We must all come to the place where no matter who leaves, we can still surge on. In Jesus name, He won’t leave but please try to get a hold of your emotions and let your trust be in God.
Once all these settle, work more at ensuring that no matter what happens you have a means of sustaining the number of children you bring into the world if you had to do it alone but that won’t be the case for you. Amen
CHEATING IS A CHOICE, STAYING FAITHFUL IS ALSO A CHOICE.❤️
You will always meet ladies who are more attractive than your woman, you will meet ladies with more vibes, you will meet women who are more informed, you will meet women who acts as though they care more than your woman.
Also as a woman you will meet men who are far richer than your man, you will meet men with more attractive body than your man, you will meet men with more vibes, you will meet men who act more caring than your spouse, you will meet men who talks better than your man;
I mean men who knows how to say sweet words, crack jokes. Etc.
Note. People must always be better than others in some areas of life.
And sometimes the people we see as being better than our spouses may not even be what we feel they’re. Note. People show you what they want you to see and most of the time it is not their true self they reveal outside.
Learn to appreciate your partner
Love your partner without any reservations.
Whenever you feel unsatisfied regarding any aspect your partner is not doing well, be willing enough to open up to him/her.
Be satisfied please.
It takes commitment, and self control and discipline to stay faithful, and believe me it is achievable.
Love is never enough, self-discipline and relentless commitment is very essential when it comes to relationship/marriage.
Stay Faithful.
One Woman Is Enough!
One Man Is Enough!