True Life Story: How My Husband Convinced Me To Spice Up Our Marriage

True Life Story: How My Husband Convinced Me To Spice Up Our Marriage

A note to our readers, the story below contains some description of s3xual orientations that may be unakin to some. Reader discretion is advised.

Hello Lively Stones,

Please hide my identity. My story may be offensive to some but I am not seeking to offend anyone… I am a desperate woman trying to save her marriage. I believe this platform will not judge my actions but appreciate my situation. I am a woman who believes that marriage is for better or worse. My parents were married for 47 years before my dad died and my mom did not remarry again. I have been married for 16 years, I got married really early, at age 23 while my husband was 35 years.

When we got married, our s3x life was great. My husband and I used to even film our s3x life. It was exciting and fun. We did not have a conventional marriage but we were happy. My husband was a very carefree man. A ladies man, he flirted sometimes but it was nothing serious. My husband and I did not have any issues but after about 12 years of marriage, the s3x drive of my husband started diminishing while mine started increasing in my late thirties.

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At first, it was not an issue because I thought he was getting tired from stress at work but I caught him one day masturbating and when I confronted him, he apologized and said he does not know what is wrong with him. I prayed and fasted with him, he said he never does that anymore but our s3x life did not improve. As an understanding wife, I left my husband and decided to take him as he is.

So whenever he wants s3x, I allow him….and this is like once in a month  until it became, once in five months and today, we don’t even have s3x anymore. I have tried to understand it. I concluded that maybe he has a side chick outside. I also concluded that maybe its the age bracket between us. All these happening, did not stop my husband from being a good dad to our children and he still was a good husband to me except in the area of s3x. At this point, I accepted my fate.

I used to hear stories of couples who lived many years together but they are not intimate and I accepted mine had become one of them. I know my parents were not that intimate too in their old age. In my head though, cheating on my husband never came to mind. Yes, I have urges. I invested in toys. My husband was aware. He bought some of the toys. Sometimes he uses the toys on me too. He used to enjoy watching me pleasure myself. We have accepted our fate. We are happy, no one is fighting anyone.

Around August of last year, my husband asked me if he can ask me for a favour, I said what is the favour, he said, he would like to watch another man have s3x with me. At first, I thought he was testing me, so I told him God forbid, it can never be me. He told me he was serious and I told him not to worry…that I am not interested. Then he started sending me adult movies of men who watch their wives with other men. I knew this was not right but this was coming from my husband…how do I make him see this is not right?

I tried several times to explain to him that what he is desiring is called s3xual fantasies but that does not mean he should actually go through with it. He said he is my husband and he is giving me permission….that there is nothing wrong in it. We argued on this for two whole months. He argued that the reason our s3x life was bad was because we are not fulfilling our s3xual fantasies. He asked me if I had fantasies and I told him mine…I told him my fantasies was to make love in the sandy beach.

My husband said there is no reason why married and committed couple cannot live their fantasies. He argued that we are both adults and we love each other. This continued until I finally agreed. I told him on one condition, no women will be involved and he said yes. Hubby was so happy. He told me that he would set it up. I did not understand but he booked a luxury hotel for us and arranged for a young man to join us.

Without trying to recall how everything happened that day, I must say, it felt very weird but at the same time, very exciting. The excitement was more for my husband. He seemed so happy….and because of this…he was actually able to make love to me after the guy finished with me. I found that my husband’s fantasy was the key to rebuilding our s3xual life. I wanted my husband back and so I was ready to do whatever it takes.

So from last November last year, it became a regular thing for us. My husband was always the one arranging the guys for me. And after that, he would be so turned on that he would want me again. On valentine’s day, hubby took things to another level, instead of a guy, he invited a girl to come join us. I was surprised because we agreed from the first time, that no women will be involved but he said he would not touch her, but he would watch me and the girl play with each other. He begged me that he was so excited to watch me with a woman. This was the part I was not prepared for.

As the girl and I played….hubby got involved even though he said he would not…and before I knew it…the girl was f#cking my husband. I became angry and slapped the girl. I got so upset that I asked the girl to leave. My husband and I had a very big argument. He was arguing that if he can watch another man with me, he see no reason why I cannot watch him with another woman. Well, that was not the deal from the beginning. I told him I would not do this anymore. He said I was being selfish and said if I don’t continue with these our s3x games, he will no longer be interested in our marriage.

What??? I thought I never heard him correct but he repeated it. He said, he is a man and he has given me everything I want, that I am being selfish and controlling. He mentioned that he never wanted to hurt me but that he cannot pretend about who he is around me for the rest of his life. That its best we go our separate ways since we cannot be s3xually compatible anymore. I could not tell anyone about this because that would mean I will expose that I have been with other men while my husband partook in a threesome too. That information would be too damaging for anyone to find out.

I could not even pray because I felt very far from God since I have been sleeping with other people inside my marriage. I am confused and have no idea how to solve this problem. I love my husband. I don’t mind him having side chicks, I have accepted my fate…what man does not cheat with side chicks? But my challenge is…I cannot watch him with other women…its too humiliating. It makes me feel like I have failed as a woman…like I am not good enough for my man….like the other lady has more power and control over my man than I do.

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• True Life Story: I Am A Happily Married Man But I Have Had Fantasies About Other Men

My husband and I have not been intimate since February. He is still insisting on me compromising. He has apologized for asking for a divorce but he says he won’t change his mind about a threesome with another woman. He says it is because he loves me that he has not married another wife but that I should accept our s3xual games with other people just to keep things spicy. What do I say to this? How do I accept this? How do I control my feelings when another woman is with my husband s3xually?

This my story may not be conventional with most couples but I am fighting to save my marriage….why should I leave my marriage for other women? what else can I do?

Anonymous

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