True Life Story: My Husband Is Having An Affair Just To Get Rich Again
Hello Lively Stones,
I don’t know if my story is a confession story but my husband is the one that needs to confess that he is a cheat and scam, a selfish man….he needs to change his ways otherwise I am leaving this marriage. The only problem is, I am stuck in the marriage for now because we are not financially buoyant but every day in this marriage is a living hell and I don’t know what to do anymore….it’s driving me crazy, please advise me.
When I met and married my husband, I met Uju (not real name) who he and everyone told me was his school daughter. She seemed very nice and took me like her big sister immediately. My husband plays a big brother role in her life and I just accepted that…I never suspected anything. My husband does the same for many of his family members and mine too…always assisting people financially.
Four years later, my husband’s distant cousin came to ask my husband for his permission to marry Uju. This cousin of his is a very rich guy, he is into oil and gas exportation as well as other big time businesses. My husband played a very big role in Uju’s wedding. He even pretended to be emotional during their traditional wedding.
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Its been like five years that Uju has been married, her children visit us during the holiday and my children visit her during the holidays too. Unfortunately, my husband lost his job last year. Things have been very difficult for us because my husband had a very good paying job and he never wanted me to work. I am a full time house wife. After he lost his job, we tried to start a business with his savings, he bought two buses to put on public transport business. My husband lost so much money by trusting someone to import those buses….a family friend.
Eventually, it turned out that the guy scammed my hubby, he did not buy any bus and he has not been answering our phone calls since for many months. Things went from bad to worse. We could not pay our house rent, we begged our landlord to be patient with us but the man only gave us 3 months, after which he served us a quit notice. My husband was so upset that the man was inpatient after we have been loyal tenants for over five years, my husband said we should pack out…pack out to where? The house were building is still at foundation level.
I tried to beg the landlord but my husband got angry with me for doing that, saying I am disrespecting him as a man. Some of his family member heard what happened and they encouraged him that they will help us get another accommodation. Then my husband called Uju’s husband for help. I was surprised he did that. Because he was too proud to beg our landlord but he was not ashamed to call his school daughter’s husband for help. Of course, Uju’s husband out of respect, gave my husband one of his apartment in an estate in Lekki.
That man removed shame from our eyes. We moved into this luxurious duplex that Uju’s husband gave us and Uju helped us furnish it. Uju was bringing food stuff for us and making sure we were ok. Being that they also lived in the estate, it was very comforting to always rely on Uju for anything we needed. They even enrolled our children in the same school that their own children go to. I felt a bit uncomfortable that small Uju became our destiny helper but you know, God can use anyone right….
Things have been going on fine until two months ago. Our children had gone to the village for holiday with their grand parents. I went to the island market on this faithful day. And it rained so heavy that I was stuck for many hours. I texted my husband that I will be delayed because of the rain and said no problem. But as the rain got heavier, I looked at the fact that the more I wait, the more it gets dark and the rain might never stop. So I entered the rain, there was no taxi cos of the rain so I took bus. I was heavily drenched.
Getting home, I tried to call hubby to come open the gate for me but the network was not allowing my calls go through. I have my own key, so I let myself into the house. On getting inside…everywhere was quiet so I went upstairs to look for my husband. As I got closer, I began to hear sounds….and when I got to our room…it was my husband’s back I first saw….and then I saw them together: Uju and my husband were fcking. The btch was moaning and screaming as my husband was ramming her from behind. I screamed….they both looked at me like they saw a ghost. It would have never occurred to me in a thousand years.
My husband and Uju? Uju is like 7 years younger than him. Uju ran off our house as she was begging me to please to please forgive her. My husband did not say anything. He got up and dressed up. I demanded answers….why would he do this to me? He did not answer me until I threatened to expose him and Uju to Uju’s husband. That was when I saw a side of my husband I never seen before. He went after my me and grabbed my neck….he threatened to murder me if I tell anyone about him and Uju. He said he is a desperate man and he needs Uju for his plan to work out and so I cannot dare to be in his way.
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My husband said he knows Uju has always been in love with him. They had an affair many years back but because of the age difference, he did not want to marry her. So now that things are bad, he wants to get back on track with Uju’s help. That can’t I see how wealthy Uju’s husband is…that Uju has agreed to help him financially but on one condition, that he f*ck her. It was Uju’s idea for my husband to call her husband for help. She helped convince her husband to help us with the house and everything they have been doing for us. I was shocked, and ashamed of my husband and the extent he is willing to go to get money.
My husband insulted me, saying he regretted marrying me, that I am good only for child bearing…that since things have been bad, that I have not contributed or made any effort to get us out of this predicament….I reminded him he was the one who always discouraged me from working and he said, well you are a fool for remaining unemployed after things went south. I couldn’t believe the words coming out of my husband’s mouth. I tried to do several things after he lost his job but he was the one telling me that I was embarrassing him….that he is the bread winner of the house and his wife must never work. Now, he said I am useless?
What even baffles me more is that, for the past one year, our s2x life has not been the same. Every time, my husband is not interested in s3x…he will say he has too much on his mind, that he is thinking of how to make money, that s3x is not on his mind….but right now, he is having s3x with another man’s wife. He said Uju is young and s3xy, that its only Uju that makes his manhood stand again. Can you imagine? I have not seen Uju since that day. I noticed she blocked me. I cried for many weeks because my husband did not talk to me and I knew he was with Uju who’s husband was not in the country at the time.
Right now, I don’t know what to do? Like I said, I don’t have any money of my own….if I decide to leave now…I will be leaving with nothing….and I cannot tell anyone about my husband’s affair with Uju. This last month has been the most terrible time of my life. I have thought of ending it all but then, I will be leaving my children without a mother…of course, my husband will marry someone else…and still be f*cking Uju. How can he be so heartless? Am I truly nothing to my husband? I can’t believe he said all that I am worth is just for child bearing alone.
I went to one of my husband’s friends who I know he trusts and told him what was happening. This man told me he is aware of my husband’s plan and that as a good wife, I should stay by my husband until things change. That its not a new thing for a man to have a side chick. That many side chicks have helped men become successful. That as long as my husband has not asked me to leave, that I should be patient and that I will reap the fruit of my labour later in life…can you see what his best friend is telling me?
I know I need a plan before I finally divorce this man. Please I need your advise. I am thinking of saving enough money before I take the divorce decision but now that my husband is aware that I am aware of his plan, he has stopped giving me money for anything. How am I going to save any money? I have thought of getting a job but since I graduated from school 18 years ago, I have never worked in my life….who is going to employ someone of my age with no experience…it feels like I am stuck in this marriage except I go look for a rich man to sleep with.
And right now…I don’t think looking for a sugar daddy is a bad idea because my husband is doing the same thing to survive and I am so hurt right now….all I can think of is revenge. My husband said if I have any sense, I will support him to continue with Uju so that we can become rich too like them. Uju’s husband has promised to make my husband one of his business partner. My husband wants to be rich so bad that he does not care what I think about him cheating….so maybe I too can help us get rich too by sleeping with sugar daddies…. what a man can do,…a woman can do it better right?
If there is another way, please advise….for my mental sanity….I can’t sleep anymore….I am going really crazy.
Anonymous
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Your husband is a very irresponsible man, he is an ingrate, how can a man be banging the another man’s wife, a man who helped you for that matter. Gosh, some men disgust me. Him and his friend are very irresponsible men.
My dear sister, please, look for a job, you will see, it doesn’t have to be corporate job, just try to get a means of income, you will see.
Your idea of getting a sugar daddy to be banging because your husband is doing it, is wrong, more so, it’s evil and wickedness to cheat on your spouse even if the spouse is cheating on you, or do you want to be an irresponsible person like your husband? So, please, dead that evil idea, IT SHOULD NEVER BE AN OPTION, adultery is a sin people have made so light of, but do not join them.
If you can tell Uju’s husband, his wife is an irresponsible woman, please do. Infact, tell him, he should never come close to your husband, if he asks why, tell him what you saw, please do, its so disgusting that your husband is banging the wife of a man that helped him financially, its so pathetic some men are so wicked, trust me, your husband and Uju can murder that man just so they can be together, please protect that man at all cost.
But, incase he starts flirting with you, please, cut off from him totally, you seem to be a woman of character. You will overcome this.
I wish you well.
✌
Like you said, “all I can think of is revenge ” ok, after sleeping with sugar daddies, then what next? You will only be like your husband, an adulterer and irresponsible woman, so, please, DEAD THAT SATANIC IDEA of committing adultery. Our true nature shows when under pressure. You don’t need any sugar daddy, sugar daddy culture is evil and wicked, run from it.
Dear poster,you should understand that your husband has always being rich,he is not used to being poor. He sees this opportunity as a way of getting back on his feet but this is rather ridiculous of him as a married man.
He deceived you about Uju,he didn’t marry Uju because of her age,then he just married you just for marrying sake and that’s why he can do and say all those nonsense to you without being remorseful or sober for his actions.
You need to get something doing asap,be firm and don’t quarrel with him any longer, pretend you’re okay with whatever he’s doing with Uju atleast he can be giving you money,save the money,keep collecting money, remember you ain’t working and you have yourself and kids to take care off.
Pretend to love him, ignore his rubbish with Uju,don’t get angry,just be happy with him,so that he can be giving you money. My sister save oooo, because e get why. Then you know what next to do with the money you have gathered so far
Don’t divorce him,never!
Don’t go after sugar daddies,be warned!
Save enough money from your husband, infact look for a way to gett Uju’s number since she already blocked you. Get it and tell her you don’t have anything against her ooo,that you understand she was the one your husband has always wanted to marry but because of her age bla BLA BLA,you can even ask her to give you money to start up a business,madam use your brain and play your game well,no be everything you go dey attach unnecessary emotion too.
Stop thinking and take care of your beautiful self.
Moral lesson to those sit-at-home moms claiming I’m a full time house wife,una colleague don japa oooo,you better look for something to do, online business is there ooo,do something.
I’m really sorry to hear that you’re going through such a difficult situation. Discovering that your spouse is having an affair can be incredibly painful. Here are a few suggestions on what you can do:
Take care of yourself: Focus on self-care during this challenging time. Surround yourself with supportive friends and family, engage in activities that bring you joy, and prioritize your physical and emotional well-being. Taking care of yourself will help you cope with the pain and make better decisions about your future.
Evaluate your relationship: Assess your relationship and determine whether you believe it can be salvaged. Consider whether your husband is genuinely remorseful and willing to work on rebuilding trust. It may be helpful to seek individual counseling to gain clarity on your own needs and desires.
Financial considerations: If your husband’s affair is motivated by money, it’s important to evaluate the impact on your financial situation. Consult with a financial advisor or attorney to understand your rights and options, especially if divorce becomes a possibility but not initiate divorce in anyway.
Seek support: Reach out to a support group or a therapist who specializes in infidelity. Talking to others who have experienced similar situations can provide comfort, guidance, and new perspectives.
Remember, every situation is unique, and it’s essential to make decisions that are right for you. Take the time you need to heal and consider seeking professional and godly guidance to navigate this difficult period in your life and also pray for him.
Sometimes life put an human in a very difficult position that makes it harder to think clearly, I’m sorry you had to hear those hurtful words from your husband. Please bear in mind that he is a frustrated man, someone who earns so we’ll becoming someone who now begs and look up to people to have one or two things is extremely humbling for a man of his Caliber.
Not surprised he got desperate. Everything he told you was a reaction from his sadness, he is unhappy, that doesn’t justified all he said though.
You have a valid reason to Divorce, But I don’t think that’s the right thing to pursue now. Considering your situation , it’s Time TO TURN THE OTHER CHEEK.
Reconcile with your husband, support him even though it’s difficult, but it’s a lesser evil. Now the plan is to use that reconciliation to gather as much money as possible that would enable you stand on your feet. Then if the matter is still eating u up after those years and you can’t let go, divorce. But this time, you now have something to fall back to.
Everything is planning. Many people endure toxic bosses and abusive collegues because they have no option at that moment. It’s a lesser evil to being unemployed.
In the same vein, Reconcile, Endure, plan yourself and STRIKE!
Dear Poster,
Your husband kept so much away from you. Most marriages have baggages and secrets. I don’t sign them as appropriate but yours is one of such.
The question is, do you still want your husband and family? Can you distract yourself with a good skill and means of income?
You have to find a way to earn and raise money.
Make up with your husband till you find the best option to deal with the situation.
Divorce isn’t the best option right now.
Don’t as the lady any form of assistance. Keep your hand clean. If you do, invariably you are supporting your husband and hurting yourself more . Remember, all we do today await us tomorrow.
Focus on God and keep.praying for your husband. He will come around some day.
Best wishes.