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True Life Story: My Wife Wants Wants A Divorce-Did I Push Her Too Far?

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True Life Story: My Wife Wants Wants A Divorce-Did I Push Her Too Far?

Dear Lively Stones,

My wife is seeking for a divorce and its all my fault. Please keep me anonymous for the sake of my family and children. Some people are expecting me to divorce my wife because in their eyes and culturally, my wife is actually the one who has committed an atrocity but I know I have a serious part to play for the blame. It all started in 2020, I think around June,by that times, our marriage was going through some serious issues. It was mostly me that was complaining that my wife was no longer attractive to me and she too was loosing interest in s3x.

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Before we started having children, our s3x  life was like great…more than average at least…and I could manage to resist temptation from outside cos the streets are crawling with women just throwing themselves at a man especially married men. But things got worse after our third child, we were facing trying times, she suddenly lost interest in s3x. When I touch her, she will say she is tired or not in the mood. When I complain, she will reluctantly lay down on the bed for me to do my thing and leave her alone.

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It got to a point where I was frustrated and I yielded to the temptation outside. It was not my finest moments but I cheated on my wife several times and justified it that she was the cause because she was not giving me good s3x but to be honest, I wanted her to be jealous and want me back. Unfortunately, I got the maid pregnant and the girl refused to have an abortion no matter what I tried to give her.

My wife got to know and that really damaged everything in our marriage. It was a horrible time in my life. My wife wanted to leave…my family turned against me…I disappointed everyone and my children, as small as they were, they were not happy with me. Infact, it took the intervention of God that my wife remained in the marriage. However, she stopped working so she can be at home to take care of the children and stop bringing maids to the house. But since then, no matter how much I begged and apologized….we never were able to get past that hurt.

My marriage was like we were two strangers living together just for the sake of the children. Towards the end of last year, on our wedding anniversary, my wife moved back to our bedroom…we made love for the first time. I was shocked…it was like I was making love to a brand new person, my wife had become a tiger in s3x. I thought it was because we had not made love in almost two years, maybe she missed me. Anyway, I was happy that she seemed to have finally forgiven me. All was well finally. I was even using our case to advise other couples facing infidelity problems.

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In April this year, my wife got pregnant but it ended up in ”miscarriage”. I did not mind cos we already have 3 children anyways. So, I moved on. Until the month of June, one evening, my generator refused to come on, I had called the generator guy to come and fix it for several times, this guy will collect different amount of money from me but the gen would not work. That evening, I saw my neighbor talking to a young man that was fixing his own generator, so I asked him of his own Technician is good so I can use him to fix my gen.

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My neighbor said he is very good. So, I told him I would like his own guy to come help me fix my gen when he’s done with his. As me and my neighbor talked, I lamented how my gen guy had been ripping me off. I noticed as I was complaining…the guy was looking at me very weird. I thought my story was amazing him but he asked me, you mean that guy that comes to repair your gen has been collecting money from you? I said yes….he shook his head…he asked me how much…I calculated almost 100k that I have given the guy for my gen.

My neighbor shook his head again and sighed. He said this: my brother , I don’t like to meddle into another man’s affair but as a man, I cannot take it when another man is f*cking my wife and also charging me for it. I was shocked…but my neighbor was like, are you having issues with your wife?I said no…he said…are you sure? Cos, its common secret that the generator guy is doing something with your wife…and he does not want to care but if the guy is swindling me too…then I need to know.

Initially, I wanted to get angry with the neighbor but I just asked him to tell me more…why he suspects my wife is sleeping with a common generator guy…he said, since 2020,m he has been working from home as an IT expert so he hears when most people drive off to work, the compound is supposed to be quiet for him to start working….he said that once I drive off….different strange men open the gate and go my apartment and they don’t leave until maybe I am about to 12 noon or when my wife knows the children are about to come back from school.

My guy said its the noise of the gate opening that distract him and that is how he was able to recognize one of the men as my generator guy. So, he accosted the guy one day, asking him what are you always coming to do at such a quiet time in my house cos he never sees him working on our gen. The guy wickedly laughed and said he is servicing my wife’s personal generator. My neighbor told him to stop it cos its an abomination to sleep with a married woman and the gen guy said, he is not the one at fault, that my wife is all over him…that if he does not answer her call, she will come to his house and he does not want his wife to know that he is sleeping with this woman.

After listening to my neighbor, the guy was like, if I want to test what he is saying…I should set a trap for my wife….I should ask my wife to call the gen guy the next day while I hide in his apartment. I quietly told him I can’t believe what he is saying but I will do what he is saying. So, I went back in…told my wife to call the gen guy tomorrow….next day, I went to pretended to drive to work but I parked at a supermarket and waited for my neighbor to call me….about an hour later, neighbor asked me to come quickly.

I sneaked back into the compound and into my apartment from the back door….what my eyes saw almost destroyed me. I walked into my wife and a strange man f*cking…I looked closer and the man is my dry cleaner….a man that has worked for me for more than 5 years. Instantly, I gave the man a big blow….he lost his balance….I began to fight him…my neighbor came and was trying to separate us. Meanwhile….my wife just kept staring at me…like no remorse…nothing…no begging…

The dry cleaner man ran out when he saw a small window to get out of my grip…as I faced my wife….asking her why….that I heard she was fcking my gen guy but its the dry cleaner….my wife just said…no o…I am fcking both of them…gen guy will come in the afternoon. yes…..that was what she said….I slapped her…my neighbor had to hold me down not to injure her…when I asked her why she was doing this…my wife just blurted out….you caused everything.

My wife said…after I got our maid pregnant…she felt disgusted at me, she almost took her own life…that she blamed herself for not giving me enough s3x that drove me to the hands of our maid….she said she wanted to prove that she can be a bad btch too and so, she began to plot her revenge since…so she started watching prn…later she started sending nude videos to strangers online…and then one day, she started f*cking every man that came to our house.

As we were talking….the generator guy knocked on the door….oblivious to the fact that I was around….this same guy I been trying to call for weeks, he refused to pick my call but here he was…ready for his s3x appointment with my wife. I pounced on him….he started to beg…saying its not his fault…that my wife has s3x sickness…because several times he wanted to stop but my wife kept tempting him with money and nice things and my wife would cry so much that she is lonely…so he only tried to make money from a willing benefactor.

My neighbor asked me to let the gen guy go…I did…I was ashamed…I wanted the ground to open and swallow me….

I need your advice.

…TO BE CONTINUED BY 6PM TODAY

Anonymous

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Jzhane
Jzhane
A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J

7 COMMENTS

  1. What you can do at the moment is to be PATIENT sir.

    Before you condemn yourself sir, pls be PATIENT. Don’t act now because whatever decision you make now can be destructive.

    I know what happened requires you to act immediately but if you do, the devil has you where he wants you.

    What you can do at this moment is to go before God and ask Him to HELP YOU. Let God HELP YOU first before having a discussion with your wife. Are you listening to me sir?

    I will say it again, BE PATIENT.

  2. Sincerely this Ur story is pathetic ,sad ,horrible and vile

    There is no perfect excuse for why people cheat ,but if u had made mistake before it is required she forgives u and move on

    I do not see why she would be using her body as a tool for revenge ,this is very disgusting I can’t imagine

    From u to a dry cleaner ,from a dry cleaner to a barber from a barber to a gardener etc

    She is shameless ,I tell u this is very unbelievable she has no remorse for her action

    And this is what porn does ,we really do not say this things because many of us are engaging in it ,but porn destroy it is like a person smoking cigarettes who knows it is damaging his lungs but can’t help but still consume it ,porn is that way

    U see when u start watching porn it affected Ur ideology about sex ,purity and stain Ur mindset

    U begins to see every one as a sexual tool ,this is what many of us pass through

    It blur Ur mind from seeing the innocency of people ,u begin to think every one is a sex object

    Ur wife was lonely ,she needed help but didn’t seek it from the right source she occupied her self with garbage no wonder she can’t stop

    Look at how messy she has become it is normal for people to make mistakes ,what is not normal is when people think the best form of revenge is to do same form like sex

    Two wrong doesn’t make a right

    This is why I concluded that if as man u hurt a woman ,pls apologies to her ,pleas for her forgiveness but never beg her to stay ,if she wants to go respect her decision , because if she stays because of Ur begging then there is serious issues ahead ,she might use that to punish u

    Hello how do u guarantee that the time she wasn’t enjoying sex with u she wasn’t having it outside ,how ?

    I said something before as long as there is nepa light u don’t need a generator ,once she is having it outside or he is having it outside ,they would not love it with u or feel anything having it with u

    Ur wife maybe was probably been doing it before u had sex with Ur housemaid

    But when u asked a partner ,why she cheat ?

    She would give u a perfect excuse and really she would blame u

    Do u expect her to say it is her fault ,

    Do not blame a woman for anything ,that’s the way it is she doesn’t want to be blame

    So how do u want to start ,do u feel u would have any iota of respect when u go out

    I did not join u , but she needs help both emotional , spiritually and physically

    Imagine a woman paying other men to have sex with her ,what kind of urge is that ?

    Porn cause it ,Ur cheating it her excuse

    I would not tell u what to do ,but u have serious work to do

    Ur dignity as a man is tarnished ,now u do not know if she want to be help

    Until Ur partner sees they did wrong ,u can’t help them

    Until they are truly sorry for their action ,they ain’t sorry

    Ur wife is not sorry

    A shameless woman would drag u to the lowest point

    Infact it is better u stay with a hoe than to be living with a woman who has no shame .

    But u have work to do ,I can’t tell u to divorce her but she needs help

  3. Hello sir i feel you both should go for therapy to repair your marriage. Drop the blame game and make effort for repairs….do this for the children, you will win sir just try restart and learn from the mistake

  4. She should have left the marriage instead.
    I don’t even know where to start from

    Omoooo ☹️☹️ this betrayals, pains, hurt, emotional damage is just to much to handle.

  5. Any woman that stays after being cheated on is definitely going to cheat back. You people think it’s easy for women yo handle it? No it’s not. You started it and she is finishing it. It’s just unfortunate that you both are too selfish and you put sex above what’s good for your children because these are very unhealthy behaviours you’re both exhibiting in the name of sex and revenge.

    But as a man know this, if you cheat on a woman, the day she finds out, she is NEVER the same again. No matter how easy you think she is taking it, you are just deceiving yourself.

  6. The earlier you realized the marriage is over the better for you. Kindly file for divorce so that bot if you can go your separate ways

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