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My Husband Has Gone Too Far – After Demanding A DNA Test. See What He Says

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My Husband Has Gone Too Far – After Demanding A DNA Test. See What He Says

Good day ma,

I will make my post short because is a very long one. Well, I was 17 when John (not real name)and I met. I was a tennis player for my secondary school and he was in the football team of his school. We met at a state championship program. John was such a good player and most girls from the various schools had a crush on him. But somehow, we met at the registration stand, he didn’t have a pen, I gave him mine and he somehow managed to copy my house address from the registration paper.

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The next week, John was at my house and my father almost killed me. But he kept hiding and trying to get my attention. I used my tennis practice period to sneak out to meet with him. John was the love of my life. He wanted to play football professionally. I went on to study in the university and he went from one local club to club hoping to be signed on a professional club one day.

I gave John my virginity. He was the best friend and lover. We kept in touch even when I was in school and he was moving from city to city. Our problems were these: John had alot of female fans who were always on his neck. It was a major problem for our relationship. I heard several rumors and he would beg me not to listen to them but I actually caught him a few times.

John would beg and beg and promise to be better but it was always the girls. That made my father not like him. Infact, my dad warned me to forget him and face my studies. Well, in my final year, just as we were planning to get married after I graduate, even though my father was against it, John messed up big time. He got a girl pregnant and the girl made a huge scandal of it cos John was denying he was responsible.

And that was it for us. I was heartbroken but I would never marry a man with a child. My parents would not hear of it. John was heartbroken when I broke up with him. He could not play football for a year. I graduated and met someone else who I married. In my heart, I never loved any man like I loved John.

I have been married now for six years. Last year, around November, I got a call from John. He now plays for a professional international club which I wont mention here. I was surprised to hear from him. We chatted and he told me he has never stopped thinking about me. John is married to a white woman with a daughter now. He told me he was coming to Nigeria and he wants to see me.

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Well, I said no way. I would never see him. That was when John told me he has prostrate cancer and he was dying. My heart stopped beating and became so hard I almost died. I knew I had to see him. I found a way to see him when he came last December. He looked frail and weak. He said he knew God punished him with the cancer cos of the way he treated me. I told him I already forgave him and there was no need for that.

It was an emotional one for both of us cos I knew I still loved him and he still loved me. I admit, we cuddled and John wanted to make love to me one more time. I shouldn’t have but I did. It was his wish before he died. That night, I would never forget. And apart from telling it here,no one will ever find out. There are things the heart wants that one can never explain.

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John passed on in February this year. I cried so hard for days in secret. In march, I received a letter from John’s lawyer where he willed three houses and 500 million to me and my children. Unfortunately, my husband was there when I received the the letter. I did not expect his reaction but my husband got angry and tore the letter. The next thing he said was : he wants to do DNA test on our children. That why would my ex will 3 houses to me and my children and half a billion to us too.

My husband has been going on saying I must explain but what can I explain? John gave more than half of his estate to me because he was the love of my life and me his? Even his family is outraged but then…I did not have anything to do with this…and this makes me so angry that  my husband is accusing me of cheating and suspecting my children are not his. Well, I am happy to do the DNA test if he insist but if I do that, and of course its negative, I am leaving this man.

Its one thing to be upset but to doubt the paternity of my children is a crime I don’t think I can ever forgive. And for what its worth…John will always be the love of my life. I will not disrespect his memory by this stupidity that my husband is trying to bring up. If you were in my shoes, will you not do the same?

Finally, we got the paternity test done last month and of course, the children are his. But trust is broken. I no longer find myself attracted to him and he truly disgusts me. I want a divorce . That may seem extreme but he was the one who started it first. Am I being paranoid? How do you even accuse your wife of six years who has done nothing but be loyal to you of cheating and saying your children are not yours anymore? Can you ever forgive that?

We have not been speaking since April and frankly speaking, the fact that he is even saying that even though the DNA test proves the children are his…but he will never allow me take the houses and money John left for me and my children. Is that not enough insult upon injury? What would you do if you were in my shoes? Forget the houses and money or walk away from such an a manipulative marriage?

Anonymous

 

Photo Credit:iStock

 

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Jzhane
Jzhane
A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J

5 COMMENTS

  1. Honestly. You are not remorseful at all. It’s funny how you act like you are the victim when actually you are the culprit. You even said how can you husband accuse you his wife of six years of adultery when you have been loyal…I ask you, when you were having S.e.x with you were being loyal right. You kept referring to John as the love of your life, you are not even remorseful at all. Now you are not attracted to your husband again, that he disgusts you, cos he started it first…no no no sister, you are greedy, can’t you see you are actually self centered, you don’t love your husband, you don’t at all. You said this “John will always be the love of my life. I will not disrespect his memory by this stupidity that my husband is trying to bring u”, can you see you don’t love your husband. You know John committed a GREAT SIN by sleeping with you a married woman, you have no idea the gravity of your sins. I pray you repent and apologize to your husband, but I doubt you will do cos you won’t even confess your adultery to him, but you act like you are the victim when you are the culprit. FLEE ADULTERY sister. I’m just being honest with you. Imagine your husband found out you committed adultery, will you have posted this exact write up..of cos no you won’t. When you are wrong, own up and don’t act like the victim. DNA should be done cos of women like you who commit adultery. GOD bless you sister.

  2. In your words.
    “My husband has been going on saying I must explain but what can I explain? John gave more than half of his estate to me because he was the love of my life and me his? “…..Yes explain how you went to commit adultery with John.

    “What would you do if you were in my shoes? Forget the houses and money or walk away from such an a manipulative marriage?”…..Any honest person here will tell you you are the manipulative person. I hope people here will tell you the truth. Blessings be upon you.

  3. May your greed not kill you.
    I pity the battles to are setting up for your children against the John’s family cos I fear you may not live to even fight it.

    Let John and his wealth be, face your marriage, family and heal the wounds you caused.

  4. Chaiii, your husband should calm down na,haba. You can’t forget about the things John gave you oooo,just be diplomatic about everything and make him understand that John was your ex. It is well

    • It is shocking to hear someone claim loyalty after commiting adultery and it is more shocking to see a dying man still wanting to fulfill lust of the flesh.I pray God will help us

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