HomeAdviceTrue Life Story: Girlfriend Break Up Engagement Four Days To Wedding

True Life Story: Girlfriend Break Up Engagement Four Days To Wedding

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True Life Story: Girlfriend Break Up Engagement Four Days To Wedding

Well done Lively Stones,

I found myself in a messy situation.. I will just go straight to the point. If you have ever been in a long distance relationship, please be very careful. Make sure your babe is not knacking someone else behind your back and confessing love to you at the same time. Sometime, in February this year, I linked up on IG with a former school mate. Her pictures really looked nice. I liked her pictures alot until she DM me, asking about me and why I am liking her pictures.

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Long story short, she told me she was into social media influencing and before long, our chat became flirty. She said she was single and we used to chat and facetime everyday. She seemed very fun loving and at some point, just sending nudes was not enough. She kept asking me to come and see her in Lagos, I would have but my job did not give me the time.

So she came in March, and spent two weeks. It was 2 whole weeks of knacking.  Next, she kept asking me where the relationship was going. I told her lets see, if things go well, it could be marriage in the long run. She laughed and said, please hurry o…I am not getting any younger. I was like, no worries, lets chill and see how things go. We started even talking about her moving to Abuja to join me, how I will visit her parents before the end of the year.

ALSO READ: Should I Break Up With My Childhood Best Friend To Save His Marriage?

This babe went as far as posting me on her stories. I truly felt she was genuine. I fell in love. I visited her in May, spent 2 days with her in the hotel. I spent money on her. Made sure we had a good time. Only for me to get a message from a guy one day, in June, the guy was asking me, how do I know this babe….I was like…what kind of question is this? he said she is his fiancée and they are getting married in July but he has been seeing me on her stories, that she claims I am her cousin in US.

My god…I told the guy to not worry about me cos I have no business with him. In shock and anger, I called my babe…telling her about the guy that called her fiancée …She started pleading…that she will explain…I said..oya explain…she said yes…they are in a relationship but she does not love him anymore but there have gone too far in the wedding planning, she is afraid of how to call it off.

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That the guy has spent alot on her and her family. That they have been having arguments since she met me ….thinking he would get the hint and break up but the guy still does not give up. That he did not wrong her but she is just not in love with him anymore. I was very upset that she was just telling me and told her to break off with the guy before anything else with us. We stopped talking to each other for some time, in my head, I thought she decided to move on and marry the dude.

Then just a week to her wedding, she showed up in my place. I asked her what she was doing here, she said she just broke up with her guy. She was crying .,..saying it was a very hard decision, and that she hopes I will not make her regret her decision. To me, I was very honest…marriage is in the near future…but if she is not being honest, I cannot play along. I will not be wondering if its me or another guy you really want.

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While she was in my place, the dude called me again…and started begging me to release the girl. That if he does not marry her, he will commit may never love any woman again in his life.  It dawned on me that he was that kind of guy that was manipulating the girl into marrying him. The girl clearly does not want him but he was crying and pleading…even saying he does not mind sharing her with me, I should just not take her away from him.

When I asked him why will he share his wife with another man, he said, she told him that my d*ck is bigger than his and he knows she likes s3x alot so he does not mind. I told him, he is crazy. So, a girl will diss your manhood, yet you still want to marry her? At this point, I wanted to be away from this drama so I told my babe to leave me alone.

I told her that even if she will not marry the dude…let her break up with him finally and give him some time before she and I continue. I wanted to be sure she is not with me just for d*ck. She said she lied to him about that cos she just wanted to get rid of him. After all the long talk, I told her, I can’t do this anymore…so she left the next day and I later found out that the wedding did not hold. However, she blocked me on all communication channels.

One of my friends who knew us together ran into her last month and she told him how she dumped her long time fiancé for me just days to their wedding yet I refused to fight for her love. I explained to my friend what happened, my guy said I messed up. That I should have pursued her after I was sure the wedding did not hold. That she is very heartbroken.  I told him I would reach out to her and see how we can mend things now that she is single.

ALSO READ: True Life Story: I Tried To Break Up With My Girlfriend But Failed

To show you how hard I tried, I had to get a new sim to call her cos she blocked my main no. When she picked up my call, she said she will never trust me again. That I let her down in her most vulnerable time. In fact, she made me feel terrible. I apologized but she said she can never trust me again. I know she is hurt but is she not the one that caused all of this?

How is it my fault that she was dating me and another guy at the same time? Yes, she broke off her wedding for the guy but she should have done so before having anything to do with me. How am I now the devil? How am I the one that is not trustworthy? I would like to be with her now, I still have feelings for her but she says she wants nothing to do with me. My friend is blaming me for not trusting her when she confessed her love for me. That it took her to end her wedding and yet, I did reciprocate her love.

My friend says she is only playing hard to get, to test me…that I am not showing enough interest and effort to get her back. So, even when I reached out to her and she said she is done with me, I should go harder. Well, I am not like her ex…maybe she is used to guys crying over her…I can’t do that.  I do not know how to convince someone to like me. I am a plain, simple man. What else am I supposed to do? A guy that was ready to do anything for her, she dumped him….what if she does the same to me? Am I being over paranoid?

Ha…abeg, I fear women o…what did I do that is so wrong, why is she putting all the blame on me now? Is this not emotional blackmail? Between me and her, who is the one that should be having trust issues against the other? Woman matter tire ma…I like her but I am confused. How do we work out any future if she says she cannot trust me?

Anonymous

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Jzhane
Jzhane
A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J

8 COMMENTS

  1. Please sir ,move on.

    She is not real,she is just playing around.

    Abeg move forward,find another better woman jare. Concentrate on your job and career biko

  2. From your story I can see u have pride and ego. Things of the heart and love should not have anything to do with your man’s hip. Bro, if you love her, go for her.

  3. it good to be back here, lively Stones.
    Please move on . She is getting attention and she loves it. sOON she ll get tired of you even while married to her and treat you same way.

    • Ur story is annoying can’t u see she is using ur head ,this is why I have said it before even though there are good women ,the women who are manipulative are more than the good women ,I suggest u dump her like the way u dump refuse in a dustbin ,she is cruel and selfish ,and one day she would cheat on u too ,once a cheater always a cheater ,do u know the sacrifices the man made for her yest she dump him ,who do u think u are , probably ur sex game is good but that’s not enough ,fear women if u loose guard too much they would manipulate u , wreck ur life and dump you ,u can’t date her ,she is ur sex mate that ends there ,I suggest u look for another woman who u can trust ,how do u manage to date a manipulative woman,now she wants to take advantage and put the blame on you because u are giving her the opportunity ,she is far from a good woman , anyway the other man was a simp ,he was ready to worship her so he got what he deserve ,just forget about her ,she used someone remember she would do same to u

  4. “I love you” is the most abused expression in the world.

    Those who say it often don’t always mean it while those who mean it don’t always say it.

    You have to stay on guard.She doesn’t love you because she says she loves you. She loves you because she proves & continues to prove it. That is how you know. Actions over words.If her actions continue to differ from what she says. That’s a cue to emotionally check out of the relationship while you allow time to reveal what your understanding cannot. For every day is for the thief but one day is for the owner.There’s a popular video of a lady who was sucking a man’s dick while saying “I love you” to her man on the phone.We must also not overlook the fact that some men use those words to get under the skirts of naive ladies & abandon them afterwards.That’s why I have always maintained that nothing about relationship is ever moral. It’s a cesspit of absurdities. And both gender do more evil with it than good:For the man, he secures his entrance into the woman’s “passage of pleasure” (because she’s the gatekeeper of sex), after which he may abandon her.For the woman, she secures his commitment (& his money) because he decides whether the relationship holds or not. While she may later cheat on him with who she genuinely wants & even give him the latter’s children.It’s always been a game that two can play.

    Unfortunately, women naturally have the upper hand, while you have to find yours through “game”.

    And if you don’t, you are certain to get played.

  5. My man nor be only u woman matter tire o, Lol, just kidding, the girl doesn’t really know what she wants yet….she was dating the other guy and couldn’t break up, all because she was enjoying the benefits, she finally found the courage to do so now she’s trying to put all the blame on you, emotional blackmail, you are the one who’s supposed to have trust issues and not her….well if you feel you want her and can cope with whatever outcome, then you can try harder in winning her love back, it is well, peace bro….

  6. […] ALSO READ: True Life Story: Girlfriend Break Up Engagement Four Days To Wedding […]

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