HomeAdviceTrue Life Story: How I Have Found Happiness After My Wife's Betrayal

True Life Story: How I Have Found Happiness After My Wife’s Betrayal

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True Life Story: How I Have Found Happiness After My Wife’s Betrayal

Good evening madam Lively Stones,

Thank you for sharing my story and thank you to the group for all the advise.(Click here to read initial story). I just want to give you an update on what has been happening since I shared my story with the group. Well, things have really changed between me and my wife. After she refused to abort the baby, I stopped talking to her. I told her I needed tome to seek advise and think on my next steps. Yes, I love her but she put me in a very difficult position.

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Like most people said, the trust was gone. I became very sad even after a month that she sent me a text that she had a miscarriage. I was not even moved because at this point, how do I know she is telling the truth after all, I am not living with her.  The pregnancy was almost 6 months….did she really miscarry? She also stopped calling only time she calls, she calls my mother to ask about the children.

All these challenges affected my work. I became emotionally unstable because of too much thinking. My close colleagues were supportive, always encouraging me not to think too much about how my wife behaved. But the loan matter too was a big problem. I could not even eat well. My colleague, a young corper started taking it upon herself to buy me food every day so I can at least eat once a day.

ALSO READ: True Life Story: One Last Good-Bye Kiss Led To A Huge Betrayal-PT 2

Then one day, I gave 2 of my colleagues a ride home after work. We were gisting and somehow the gist entered women who cheat on husbands who have been good to them. At some point, the male colleague dropped off and the corper and I continued gisting as I drove. She then said many girls like her are praying to have a good husband like me. I laughed but she said I should stop killing myself about how my ungrateful wife betrayed ma and focus on living a happy life.

When I got to her bus stop, she said she wont get down. That she will follow me home to make sure I am ok. That she wants to take care of me. I argued with her that it was not necessary and she said, stop being a fool..that is why your wife is taking advantage of you….she asked me when was the last time I had s3x….before I could respond…she out her hand on my manhood and said…be a man and stop suffering yourself….now lets go to your house.

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I have never cheated on any woman in my life: wife or girlfriend but I drove off with this lady to my place and we had s3x. And for the first time in a long time. I was very happy. Maybe it was the s3x but I felt alive again. I have been seeing this lady for weeks now. I think I am beginning to learn to forget the pain my wife caused me because of this. I feel like a man. This girl respects me, she loves me, she takes care of me.

For the first time, I have found the courage to say that I want to divorce my wife. Its not my fault…I have been patient and no man can say I did not try. I forgave her when she cheated…I still accepted her when she got pregnant but when she refused to abort the child, my whole world shattered. I opened up to my mother about everything. She did not even know I was going through all these.

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My mother has met this young woman in my life. They met last weekend. My mom like that she is well brought up and well behaved. She is very nice to my children. So after that, I sent my wife an email that I have decided to move on with my life. She can move on with hers since that is what she wants. My wife has since been begging. Calling and texting. I have refused to take her call because if I do, she might convince me to change my mind.

ALSO READ: My Wife Broke My Trust & Our Marriage Because Of Her Ex Boyfriend-Pt 2

My wife has pleaded with me and my mom to give her till March next year, to return and make things right. I reminded her of how I begged her to come home and do the abortion but she refused….so there is no need to come home anymore. She should only send money to help offset the loan and we both can move on. She said if I divorce her, she will not help me pay the loan.

That is my predicament and I need your advise. Should I pretend to agree not to divorce so she can help pay the loan back or just dump her and manage to pay the loan by myself. If I agree to wait until the loan is paid, then she must not know of my relationship with this lady. How do I do that to this lovely young woman who has been kind and loving to me? How do I keep our relationship a secret when she clearly wants to be with me and marry me? Or do you think my wife will really change and come back to her senses? Is there any small hope for our marriage to work while she is abroad doing only what God knows?

The loan is still quite something. It will take another 13 months to pay back. What should I do please? I have never been so happy in my life for sometime…I really love this girl and I would like to keep her. Her service is ending by this September. I want to propose to her. I know its just been barely a month we started seeing but she has turned my life around….I feel like I now have a reason to live after all.

Please advise…how should I go about this matter.

Anonymous

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Jzhane
Jzhane
A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J

5 COMMENTS

  1. How you should go about this matter sir, is for you to be careful with any woman you want to propose to or marry.

    You have not really being lucky with women, remember,so if I were you,I won’t rush anything, consider your age and that of the corper’s ,this age difference was part of what your wife gave as an excuse for breakup.

    If you really love the corper,there won’t be any need pretending to your wife all because you want her to come back and help offset the loan,you can’t go back to your wife,no matter what, her mum is not a good christian mother.

    It will take 13months to pay the loan, please plan yourself well and God will help you,don’t rely on your wife to help you in anyway.

    Lastly,be careful with whoever you want to settle with,once beaten twice shy. God bless you sir

  2. Marylyn has said it all but to add to what she said,Oga sir?slow down the love you have for this new girl am sure is not up to the one you have for your partial ex wife,all this excitement is because your happiness have been puncture fo a very long time due to what your wife made you went through,if you want to know if what is happening between you and that copper is lasting love just cut off every intimacy with her from this moment and don’t propose to her at least for 3 to 4 months after she is done with her service before you will think of something like that.am sure before then you will know if she loves you and can choose you over any man or not.I won’t advice you to go back to your ex wife or forget about your ex wife. But slow down make wetin do you before no come do you again.in peace I come ,in peace I walker go

  3. Hmmmmm… I smell desperation.
    You are just recovering from a heartbreak so it’s easy for your judgement to be hasty and clouded,
    That corper might just be an opportunist, desperate to get married and playing all the right card to impress you, telling her your story might also make you seem like an easy target especially seeing how nice you are and how soft you are with your previous wife.

    All I’m trying to say is beeeeee careful. I see redflag all over the corper’s attitude but for your sake I hope she is genuine. Peace.

    And don’t lie to keep your wife if you want her to go then so be it, but for that corper? Hmmm

  4. A girl grabs your dick in a car, you both were not dating, you never wooed her, yet she grabs your dick and says you should take her home to have sex with her, and that’s the girl you call wife material? Lol

    Oga calm down oo, your judgement is clouded.
    Before you will tag all women bad because you made poor choice twice. Redflags are written over this one.

    • You just have to be careful at this point in time. You should not be in haste to propose and get married to someone you barely even know. Have you done a background check on her. Are you sure she truly loves you and is not pretending. Sure she’ll treat your children right? You’ll also need to heal emotionally. You can’t afford to make the same mistake again

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